Have I offended this Muslim family?

(19 Posts)
Everincreasingirth Mon 07-Oct-13 20:04:35

Argh.... Blushing at the memory of this.
My middle ds son in year one is friends with a little boy who gas come round for a play and tea on several occasions. He is a lovely boy and they get on well so is no trouble and I enjoy having him. I don't know the mother very well. We will have a quick chat on the doorstep when she picks her boy up about the weather or whatever and likewise if we meet in the school playground. I assume (though never discussed it) that she and her family are fairly devout Muslims as she wears a head scarf and keeps her arms and legs covered and has requested that I don't give her son any meat as they only eat halal (?excuse spelling) meat.
So the little boy was here tonight and after tea got a text from the mother saying something had come up with her family, which sounded quite urgent and would I mind if her husband picked up her child. Of course said this was no problem. As it was really warm for October today the boys were playing in the garden so when the dad knocked I asked him in whilst I went to call boys in.
He followed me through to the kitchen where much to my dismay was a great pile of laundry topped by a collection of my underwear on obvious display. Nothing amazing . All m&s and the like so hopefully vaguely respectable if a little Lacey here and there. Though i would prefer nobody to see my smalls I thought oh well, nothing I can do about it now so went into garden to collect boys ( who both were ignoring my calls to come in) only to come back into kitchen to find the bloody dog with one of said Lacey bras in her mouth proudly presenting it to the dad... So now I am worried that I look like a complete tart. Should I approach the mother and say " sorry, really was not flaunting my underwear at your husband". Really don't want to offend him. He said nothing at the time. In fact appeared completely unaware that there was a bouncy springer spaniel pawing at him with a imodest item of clothing in it's mouth. At least they were freshly washed I guess . Arch!

sonlypuppyfat Mon 07-Oct-13 20:07:52

I'm sure your dog doesn't understand about rules in different faiths he was just playing.

Everincreasingirth Mon 07-Oct-13 20:08:01

Just concerned as the mum is always very modestly dressed ( scarf etc).... Maybe I am overthinking this

usualsuspect Mon 07-Oct-13 20:11:10

I'm sure even Muslim women wear bras and knickers and he has seen underwear before.

I've no clue why you think he would be any more offended than anyone else.

HormonalHousewife Mon 07-Oct-13 20:11:23

I'm sure she wears a bra and pants too wink

I feel your pain - how awful !

jchocchip Mon 07-Oct-13 20:13:29

I'd say overthinking! Least said soonest mended - I'm sure your ds's friends Mum wears lovely underwear and his dad has seen a lacey bra before grin

sonlypuppyfat Mon 07-Oct-13 20:14:54

Surely you are her friend and she wouldn't expect you to feel the same as she does, I have a Moslem friend I respect her and I'm sure she respects me. You are very nice for worrying but you are over thinking it

You're definitely over thinking it but I can't stop chuckling as it's exactly what put dogger would do! And I'd be exactly the same. So awkward when it's the first time you meet someone and you're stepping on eggshells. I'm sure it's fine!

Our*

beeny Mon 07-Oct-13 20:19:53

You are very sweet for overthinking this and im a muslim a true muslim would not make you feel bad.Hope u don't.

Everincreasingirth Mon 07-Oct-13 20:33:40

Of couse I know she wears underwear and that her husband will have seen it all before... But not my underwear! and I don't know her that well. .and I am pretty sure that if you value modesty enough to keep yourself covered when out that displaying your pants etc on the first meeting must surely break some laws of etiquette... Just hope the dad isn't going to go home and question if my son / family is suitable for his son to play with.... I know, getting my knickers in a twist if you excuse the pun

invicta Mon 07-Oct-13 20:35:51

Why don't you do a general 'sorry about the mess' type apology without going into specifics?

I'm just still chuckling - ANYONE would find it awkward if they went to someone's house for the first time and the household pooch came up to them wielding a bra!

Everincreasingirth Mon 07-Oct-13 20:38:56

Think may just ask her round for coffee and let her know about some of the other situations the dog has got us into and hope she laughs

eurochick Mon 07-Oct-13 20:39:14

I'm not sure what the relevance of them being muslim is. As others have pointed out, muslims were underwear too. I can see how it would have been embarrassing to anyone though!

ProphetOfDoom Mon 07-Oct-13 20:40:30

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Everincreasingirth Mon 07-Oct-13 20:45:23

Yep, would rather the mut didn't think it amusing to present my undies to anyone so those of you who are saying you are not sure what diff it makes him being Muslim is are right of course but somehow it just feels worse.... Thankfully he didn't get to see me chasing dog after he had left trying to retrieve the offending item, expect he could hear my language several streets away though...and no doubt that now the dog has found out what a great game this is she will be repeating it at every available opportunity ....

nicename Tue 08-Oct-13 13:52:28

I thought you were going to say that you flashed your boobs accidentally or your bum. Either wouldn't merely be a religious matter tbh.

My dbil has seen my skanky undercrackers on the line (oh the shame) and don't think its offended him. Granted, the dog wasn't wearing them...

MerryMarigold Tue 08-Oct-13 13:55:16

I think if he was offended he wouldn't have told his wife. I think if he found it funny and told her all about it then there's no need to apologise.

Stay schtum.

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