sorry, its this old chestnut but not wanting a row over it

[MerlinsBeard]

Just want someone to tell me in simple english, if god loves us all so much why does he not answer our most urgent prayers?

have issue with praying and have had for a while - i know not all prayers are answered just wondered why?and how does he choose who is more deserving?

[Nemo1977]

MOM no answers but something I have often wondered about...have had a lot of bad things happen in my life and cant understand why God would let them happen. Sometimes though I am aware he has blessed me in other ways. I dont know how he picks..

[haggered]

God works in a different time than us and sees the whole world, but when you truly ask for something he will answer but his time zone is out ......just keep at it

[Carmenere]

Now I'm no expert but I'm fairly sure that prayers are not just supposed to be for asking for stuff. God(or your faith or whatever) can only help you to deal with stuff not actually change stuff. IMO anyway.

[MerlinsBeard]

I should give u a bit of bg....i used to be a methodist but something happened involving me praying for my life and that prayer not answered that made me leave the church. I still belive in god but regards what the bible says i don't know. Recent events, where again i prayed, have got me wondered wtf i have done to deserve all this sh*t!

[Nemo1977]

I sometimes think that the sh£t is there to make us stronger for the other stuff we have to face. Ok it is horrendous to face those times [believe me have been in some dire situations] but also think it has made me a stronger person and still have belief..although never 100% sure what in.

[Coolmama]

Oh, this is a deep one -
I think that first, here's what I believe short and sweet -
for me, it is not about what God lets happen - He gives us the ability and free will to make choices and decisions and unfortunately, sometimes we make those decisions without enough thought and then, when we "reap what we have sown" we ask God why he "let" this happen.

• I do believe that God answers all prayers, he just that sometimes doesn't answer them in the way you expect, and so, because you are not looking in that direction, you don't realise that your prayer has been answered.
  

And lastly, I think it is also about how we ask for what we think we need or want.
Rather than praying "God, please change my life", maybe the prayer should be "God, please give me the strength to make the changes I need to lead a more fulfilling life" When My dad was diagnosed with cancer, I begged and bargained with God to heal him - it didn't happen. When it became obvious that my dad was going to die, the light dawned and I changed my prayer to ask God to make is passing as peaceful and painless as possible - that happened.
When my mother died very suddenly- I railed against God for taking her from me - until I realised I needed for ask God what I could learn about myself from that.
This is really brief and hope it helps, maybe just a way of looking at things a little differently.

[tenalady]

mumofmonsters, he doesnt give at an instant and he gives in the most mysterious and unexpected ways. I tried for 12 years to get pregnant. I went to church every sunday and in that section where they fall silent for you to pray for yourself and others, I pleaded to have a child. When I said my wedding vows to my now husband there was a question as to whether we should cut out the bit about procreation (cant remember the exact wording) I decided to leave it in cos I had faith that my time would come and one year later I got ds but it wasnt straight away

[MerlinsBeard]

I am reading ur replies, thank you, just finding it difficult to not go into detail (id on't want to) and also to not direct my anger at him at you

[Nemo1977]

mmm not sure about the reaping what we sow bit as a lot of things that happened to me I had no control over but dont want to go too into it. There just is no answer I think.

[MerlinsBeard]

hmm yes reap what u sow....i think nemo is prob looking at it from where i am coming from.

think i should parp myself away from my own thread b4 i offend anyone....thank you for replies tho, apprieciate it

[Coolmama]

Hi Nemo - my whole post was basically just trying to give a different view - I also don't think there are black and white answers, but maybe that's what having faith is all about.

[Nemo1977]

mom its a discussion not an arguement am sure nobody is taking offence..it is all about persepctive

[Coolmama]

completely no offence - life is way to short for that - I think that in some small part of me, I have found some way of making sense of the way God answers my prayers, but that is just me -

• If I can help, just shout -
  

BTW what's the PARP thing? or am I being an ignoramus?

[MrsBadger]

am following this thread with interest

I don't think 'we reap what we sow' always applies - I mean yes, bad decisions we make can come back and bite us on the arse, and we should treat people as we would like to be treated etc etc, but sometimes things happen to us, and the only choice we have is in how we deal with them.

Prayer, in my opinion, is asking God to give us access to strength and other qualities within ourselves, rather than asking him to solve our problems for us.

In a funny way he's like a good teacher, or a good manager, or even a parent - providing us with the tools we need to do things ourselves but not taking over and doing it for us.

In that sense prayer isn't an urgent, desparate 'last resort' - that'd be like trying to get fit by running one sprint and wondering why you're knackered. Rather it's like jogging for ten minutes a day - seems to make no difference for ages, but then one day you have to dash for a bus and realise you're not panting...

[MrsBadger]

oh, and 'parp' is MN slang for 'I'm not getting into this argument, so I'm leaving the thread'

[MerlinsBeard]

sorry, i shouldn't have started this thread really. not in the right frame if mind for it at the oment.

In particular i keep coming back to the verse erm pslam 91v 11 i think...god will send his angels to protect u and keep u from harm,....well where the fuck are they then???? thats where i am at at the moment.

[Coolmama]

HI MrsBadger - you said it much better than I did - the idea of asking God to give you the ability or strength to cope with a situation rather than fixing the situation.
The "reap what you sow" comment came to mind because I was talking to a girlfriend the other day about the fact that her DH has turned out to be a bit of a disaster, and she was asking how it is that God could do that to her etc and we ended up talking about why she didn't pray for guidance before she got married -

[Tortington]

parp is an ingnorant way or saying - this thread pushies all the wrong buttons and therefore i am not going to post - rather than not fucking posting



imagine - you only phone your mum when you want something.


that would be not nice.

so how is it ok to just talk to god when you desperatly want something?

thats the way i see it.

i dont ask for thngs on a day to day basis. becuase i dont feel i have the right as i havent talked to him properly for ages

[Nemo1977]

custy but what if you dont only talk when desperate but things are still shitty a lot of the time..as a child and in other times I have absolutely begged for some help but have always 'talked' regardless.

[monkeytrousers]

cos he doesn't exist, it's wishful thinking. but if it helps, carry on

[Tortington]

i personally talk to god when i believe strongly - i ebb and flow in this regard - so i believe he knows whats going on. - if am not getting what am asking for - its for a reason. maybe i will learn to be more tolerant, patient, graceful, prudent, accepting.

i kinda roll it in with kharma and the balance of the universe stuff

[MrsBadger]

mumofmonsters, re that verse - I always found a much more helpful one to be that one from Isaiah - something about even strong men grow tired and weary, and even young men stumble and fall, but those who trust the Lord will soar on wings like eagles, run and not grow weary, walk and not be faint.

It doesn't say 'those who trust in the Lord get to lie on comfy sofas and not have to walk anywhere' - we still have to walk the road, but we've got the resources to do it.


Am also reminded of that silly story about the woman stranded in her house during a flood who was convinced God would save her, and turned down offers of help from a neighbour in a rowing boat, the coastguards' launch and finally, as she was perched on the roof, from a helicopter, every time saying 'No, no, I'll be fine, I'm praying - God will help me'.
Eventually she's swept away and drowns, and when she gets to Heaven she stomps up to God and says 'Oi, I was stranded in that flood praying non-stop - why didn't you help me?'. God says 'FFS, I sent two boats and a helicopter, how much more did you want?'

Help comes from unexpected quarters - a bunch of random mums on t'internet might be the only angels you're going to get - make the most of them!

am thinking of you, just in case it'll help, and wishing you strength to get through whatever it is

[Nemo1977]

see thats where I have flaws with the karma etc..but wont go into it.

[Marina]

MrsBadger, that puts me in mind of Julian of Norwich's lovely passage about (paraphrasing) God said not we would not be tempted, He said not we would not be travailed, He did say we would not be overcome.
Her writings kept me in touch with my faith at a time when it was being tested very severely.
I would recommend them MoM. I could not stomach a lot of the Bible for a long time. I felt I needed a mediating, wise and faithful voice instead.

[learning]

ok I do believe in a higher power and do pray. Have asked your question so many times and i don't have the answer. But believe there is a reason for everything not necessarily what you want to believe in.

I think God or Whoever does things for a reason. Amd believe that God has a better plan for someone f he takes them early . That is something that I totally believe. That person has another role to fill or has had to much pain in their life that God decided to take them early because he knew that they suffered too much.