Advice on parenting a naturist!!!

[MiloMummy]

Please does anyone have any advice about how to get a little naturist to put clothes on! DS is almost 2 and half and every day gettign dressed is a struggle. I don't even bother if we're staying home but I feel I need to clothe him to go out (although Health Visitor says I should take him out nuddy and he'll soon get the message - don't feel brave enough to try yet but am getting desperate.

I've tried games and rewards charts and it works for a day or so then he gets wise. (No flies on him!) I end up holding him down (sometimes takes 2 of us!) and I hate it as it's making things worse and I end up being kicked or headbutted in the face as he thrashes about. All advice greatly received...

[ruty]

we had this a bit earlier with ds, around 18 months, and it was a phase he grew out of [though he still refuses to wear short sleeves in summer and jumpers in winter and no coat ever, ever.] I would take him outside with nothing on myself, just into the garden or something, until he realises it is rather cold!

[FrayedKnot]

I'm still waiting to find out

DS is 3.6



If he picks the clothes, he is a bit keener. Occasionally.

[MiloMummy]

Oh thanks so much for responding so quickly. That's so kind.

I've tried letting him pick his own outfit but I get...

Me: So, are you going to wear the red top or the blue top today?

(simple 2 option question as per all parenting books)

DS: No, nothing....

I give up!

[BlueberryPancake]

THis is a long shot but... One thing I saw on telly once is a little girl who was had hyper sensitive skin and she just didn't want to wear clothes because it was really rubbing on her skin and was uncomfortable. Have you tried organic cotton outfits, loose fitting, and super soft clothes soap (or washing balls, like the EcoBall on www.ecotopia.co.uk ?It's a wild shot but might help!

[EBAB]

Hi. Ds (3.4) is just the same, and we do actually go on naturist holidays sometimes , which has added an interesting dimension to our explaining the rules 'over here'.

I try to be very relaxed about this, getting ds (who is a hot bod anyway) dressed only when necessary. He wears a fresh long-sleeved T-shirt to bed, and will wear it for most of the rest of the next day. If we're at home, that will be just a T-shirt and nothing else. If we're going out in the car, ds will sometimes add the trousers before getting in the car, though he frequently rides naked and we just put his clothes on when we get to our destination - still in the car. And he always wants to cooperate by then.

It does help that ds has developed a bit of normal self-consciousness - he wouldn't now want to be in the supermarket naked, though would prefer to be so at home. So he won't go out/get out of the car without being dressed. Before this kicked in, we explained that it's a rule in our country to be dressed when you're out and about, and that we couldn't get out of the car and do 'x' until he was dressed. Works fine.

Two other tricks: (1) I don't know if your ds is out of nappies, but ds is, and we don't put him in pants, much to grandparents' horror. The primary reason is that he's more likely to use the loo, as it feels less like he's wearing a nappy. But it has the added bonus of less clothing to put on. (2) Don't worry about getting loads of layers on your ds. Just cover up his top and bottom, and then let him come to you if he's cold and needs another layer. This coupled with the commando approach (the French do it!) and the T-shirt from the night before means you have a pair of trousers to put on him and that's about it!

Oh, how's this for another idea: if you're prepared to don some layers yourself, you could turn your heating down/off as the autumn progresses, so that your ds gets a bit nippy and starts to ask to wear clothes?! Although we had central heating at home, Dad rarely turned it on, and so we wouldn't have dreamed of wearing anything less than about five layers!

Oops, long post, but HTH.

[gigglewitch]

ebab and blueberry have said what i came to say after seeing the OP. i work with someone who is mega-sensitive to clothes (he only wore shorts all day today. not another thing) and we find that we roll a "going out routine" together and clothes only have to be worn to leave the building, defo no undies as someone else said, and check out what fabrics he likes / doesn't.

I also have a son who likes the colour red so much that he must wear at least one item of it (hmm red socks with school uniform) bit odd but hey ho have a think

[barnstaple]

DD was like that too and after huge struggles would go to nursery (and then school) wearing things which were (usually) appropriate! As soon as she got home clothes were off. Have to say I never found a solution, but she's 8 now and is interested in clothes and fashion but still wanders around with very little on at home (and sometimes tells me as she's undressing for bath that she hadn't worn knickers today). To be honest, I found it easier to put up with the fight over dressing when she had to be clothed, and left her as naked as she wanted to be the rest of the time, though I was gently questioned by the woman at the photo-development place once as most of the photos were of my dear, but naked, child - on the phone to grandma, making a cake, dancing to dh's guitar etc!

[ruty]

oh yes i forgot to say ds refuses to wear pants too. Commando at all times.

[MiloMummy]

Wow! Thanks so much for all the helpful advice. I never even considered he might be really sensitive to the feel of clothes - even though he does have mild eczema and has disliked getting dressed since newborn. Duh! He's always telling me it hurts while getting dressed etc but I just thought he was playing up. Pass the bad Mum award please.....! I'll definitely look into it.

Plus I never thought about letting him go commando. What a great idea! He's just out of nappies and we're having a little regression stage so it might even help that. He's been potty trained whilst naked since 14 months but would always wee in pants until recently.

EBAB - I'd love to hear more about the naturist holidays. My DH is a bit of a closet naturist (like father, like son!)