I'm exhausted - does it get any easier????????

[Reesie]

My lo is nearly 8 months old and I must admit I'm shattered. I think I'm just having a bad day today - but I'm so tired, my body aches all over. I haven't had a nights sleep since my lo was born. I'm still BF and she now only wakes once at approx 3am - 4am - but is not very good at gettig back to sleep after that....

I honestly don't know how people with more than one child does it. How do you????? I don't think I'm a wimp - before I had a baby I had a really demanding job and renovated property in my spare time, I was just go, go, go.. I was also training for a marathon pre-pregnancy. I was always mellow... All that seems a breeze now !

My back aches, my shoulders ache, I've a headache and I'm having trouble keeping my eyes open.....! I'm not depressed - I'm just finding it SUCH hard work. Just managing to get the washing and cooking done whilst looking after my lo. How do you yummy mummies manage getting your make-up and hair done???????? God knows where my make-up bag is these days.....

I know I've had problems with my lo sleeping since birth. Up until last month she was waking every 2 hours at night and naps barely last 30 mins each time.

So - please tell me of your stories that things do get easier!!! Or any top tips to make things easier!

[mintchips]

It does get easier Reesie honestly. Tiredness makes everything seem 10 times worse. I bf my 2nd dd until she was a year old and she would still wake up once or twice a night for a feed.

Do you have any help with your LO? Even having a couple of hours to yourself to have a sleep or a nice bath or get out on your own can make a difference to how you feel.

I've had varying sleeping problems with all 3 of my dcs but you do get through it and it does get better

x

[DrippingLizzie]

Reesie, it will get better...my DD is 14 months now and the difference from when she was 8-months-ish is amazing. Not b/f anymore, sleeping much better and far less dependent on me during the day (i.e. she plays a lot better now, either independently or with my DS, aged 4). She's climbing all over the place now so got to always keep my eye on her, but she's certainly not as physically or emotionally demanding these days

...I think I may be getting my life back . There's light at the end of the tunnel, honest, and you're certainly not alone in how you're feeling at the moment.

The fact that you're being open and honest about your situation is great...you sound like a FAB mum!

[miniegg]

hi
i totally know how you feel. i'm much newer to all this than you - my DS is less than a month old, but i have never known such exhaustion! all the symptoms you describe! he is also a "bad" sleeper, and for the first fortnight, slept only for about eight to ten hours out of 24 - ie about half what the books say, and then only in 30 minute or hour long stretches. I actually thought I might die of exhaustion!
I had a really traumatic and long labour (it dragged on for about 40 hours, including the pre labour) and was totally shattered by the time he was born, and I just never recovered.
All i can say on a positive note is that even in this short period things HAVE got much easier. He already sleeps a lot more (it turned out the poor little thing was starving hungry as I wasn't producing enough breast milk for him. now he's on formula and seems a lot happier) so THERE IS HOPE!
also i can totally relate to what you are saying about barely having time to brush your hair/put on make up etc and all the domestic chores piling up, as you desperately try to do the washing up/put on another load of wshing in the 10 minutes you get when the baby's not crying! it's a nightmare, isn't it.
could you get some help? (a cleaner?) Do you have a partner/husband who can do a bit more around the house?
my DH volunteered to look after the baby for a whole night last Saturday, giving me my first night sleep to myself. needless to say i didn't sleep very well as i was anxious about the baby BUT it was great just to have someone else in charge. obviusly that's a bit harder if you're breast feeding but perhaps you could express enough for someone else to do the "night shift" for you occasionally? it would give you something to look forward to!

[Reesie]

Thanks sooooo much for your replies. I was just having a bad few days - I have found out why now - I've had mastitis! No wonder i was feeling so shattered!!! I will admit that I work as a midwife and I missed all the signs on myself!! I'm still saying though having a baby is still ridiculously hard work. My dh is fab - does loads of housework and gets up with lo when she's eady to start the day at 5-6am so I can have a lie in .

I've started antibiotics now and already feel a lot better.

Thanks for your support Mintchips, Drippinglizzie and Miniegg - what fab people you are!!

Also - i put some lipgloss on today - Hooray!!!!

[mintchips]

Glad you're feeling better Reesie. Enjoy your LO

xx

[CoteDAzur]

Reesie - I dare say you will continue to feel shattered until you stop the night feed and teach your little one to sleep through the night.

You will feel so much better once you start sleeping through the night!

[Reesie]

I know Cotedazur, I'm working hard on dropping the night feeds. Up to 3 weeks ago she was STILL waking 2 hourly . She's now down to the one wake up and the last couple of days has gone back to sleep to 6.30 - 7am.

I'm a bit of a wimp when it comes to cc. When she woke up I just used to go in and pat/shush her back to sleep which worked well and quickly - however the 3am-4am wakeup - she won't have any of it and goes beserk. I then feed her as she looks hungry and she does BF really well. I don't know what to do to get her to drop this feed?????

I do feel lots better though as the antibiotics have kicked in. I haven't got any family in the area and dh works long hours and weekends ect is spend trying to finish renovating the house we live in. I don't get much of a chance for a break I suppose - also she only cat naps in the day for 1/2 hour - barely enough time to clean up after the meal and chuck some laundry on!

I think also that having a baby is such a life changing event - much more than I could ever imagine before I had her. I absolutely adore her, I constant;y think of her. Ehat I find difficult is trying to concentrate on doing anything - my mind is constatly distracted by a little person trying to grab my keys/phone/hair/basically anything, trying to launch herself off the sofa/my lap, shouting as she doesn't want to be left on the floor with her toys whilst I'm trying to cook tea...etc etc She is so lovely and funny though! I am besotted - just knackered!

[whomovedmychocolate]

Ah I could have written that a few months ago! DD is ten months old. She has just (in the last fortnight) starting sleeping 8:30 till 7am and I am bloody delighted. It takes a week or so to get used to having so much sleep though!

Eventually you accept you can't do everything and that it doesn't matter if the only thing you do all day is play with your child -they will only be babies for such a short time and soon won't want to have anything to do with you - so focus on them and enjoy the time.

It is bloody exhausting relentless work, don't get me wrong but it does get easier.

[CoteDAzur]

Reesie - That is called "baby brain" and affects all mothers

To get her to sleep through the night, all you have to do is stop the night feed. That is all. It will take 2-3 difficult nights, but then she will sleep through the night. Courage!