Son is obsessed with the internet

[Snakepit]

My 8 year old son is obsessed with the internet and I'm worried he will turn into a hermit/nerd. Up until last year I wouldn't even let him use the PC, it was playstation or nothing but then at christmas I gave in and let him play "The sims 2" and he became obsessed with it, sneaking on the pc at every available moment, copying the way they act and everything and constantly going on about it. Then he started to ask to go on the internet to download stuff for it so under supervision I let him on and was quite impressed with how well he could work it using google etc.
Then he was being bullied at school so I thought it might be a good idea to set him up an email address and let him have an 'e-pal' but after setting up an address we couldn't find any suitable sites for e-pals so he joined up to club penguin and became obsessed with that, going on about it constantly and annoying people with it and from there it has just got worse. He's constantly on the PC, he's joined up to runescape and habbo hotel and just chats online constantly. Today he is off school due to the floods and has spent the entire day on habbo hotel only coming down for his dinner. I asked him to put some clothes away very nicely earlier on and he snapped and screamed at me to stop disturbing him.

Should I ban the PC or are they all like this?

[FluffyMummy123]

Message withdrawn

[mumto3girls]

give him strict times that he can be online. It's not good for him to be on all the time.

[purpleturtle]

I think you probably need some level of boundaries attached to it.

Ds1 is only 4, so still at CBeebies level, but he could play for hours if allowed to. I make him come away when he's had a while, and sometimes I use it as an incentive for doing other stuff.

[popsycal]

agree with cod
I am a teacher and we recently had a seminar on e-safety. Habbo Hotel was one of the areas which was amssively highlighted......
PLease do supervise him extremely closely. Let me see if I can find you a link

[singingmum]

Give him a time limit.I only allow my dc's 2 hrs of comp or PS" time per day unless it's for research purposes.As for the internet I'm with aol and they have a thing where you can set up extra addresses and give them age limits ie. my ds is12 almost 13 so I set him up with a 13-16 address which when he's loder I can update I'll do the same with my dd7 but with the younger account.These accounts limit what they can do on the internet(we did this after someone had searched for xena nude,thought we had better block those things)We get a report emailed to us telling us what the children have done on the internet inc accesing blocked sites.We also have to authorise websites so that they can only acces what we feel is right for them.
Good luck

[curiouscat]

Definitely ban or restrict it, too much screen time and he could lose out on real friendships and experiences. Could you sign him up for scouts or something else outside school?

My ds is 9, would love to play all day but we restrict it to an hour or two weekends only. And then only if he's behaved well etc.

[cornsilk]

Our PC sometimes 'breaks down' for no particular reason - then our ds has to find something else to do.

[USAUKMum]

we have our computer password protected and the DC have their own account to use. All Internet sites have to be pre-approved by us before they can be used on their account.

We restrict computer time to about 30 min per child (at most) -- but my DC are younger than yours. DD gets her time only on the weekends. DS mainly plays on a Wed or Thurs. DS would be there all day if I let him and he is only just under 3.

[ChasingSquirrels]

I am glad there is no one restricting my use

[Tortington]

yeah ok - with an interactive game its not good to have mum disturbing game play

however if both mum nd child were aware of strict rules that pc only in use between 7-8 pm then cores can be done before hand or afterwards.

to be honest i think the onus is on you to get his arse down the cubs or something

[USAUKMum]

ChasingSquirels I think we're supposed to be responsible with our use

[ChasingSquirrels]

shouldn't the supposed be the bit in bold

[dramaqueen]

My ds who is 6 has 1 hour per day to use the pc. When he first became a bit obsessed his behaviour detiorated, he became aggressive and only talked about the games he played on the pc. We took it away and put it in our bedroom for our use only for 4 months, to get it out of his head. Then we put it downstairs in the hall where he had to stay involved in family life as people pass by on their way upstairs etc. He doesn't like coming off it after an hour, but if we slip up and leave him longer we really notice his temper.

So I would say either ban it for a while, or cut it right back then let him earn his time on it.

[USAUKMum]

Agree with dramaqueen about breaking the cycle. Good advice.

Yes chasingsquirrel you are right now where are those children I'm sure we're supposed to be doing the school run. .......

[slayerette]

Tbh, I would be worried about the bad reaction when you asked him to put the clothes away - it definitely sounds as if it's causing him problems. Where is your PC (you say 'coming down for his dinner')? At his age, it would be best in a family room where you can see what's happening. And you should set a really strict time limit on his use - or ban it altogether for a while, see if you can get him involved in other things like clubs, etc, where he has to interact and use some physical energy. Too much research has been done on links between excessive screen time and disturbing behaviour for you not to take control of the situation now, I think.