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Parenting

do you want "the best" for your kids?

9 replies

hatwoman · 10/11/2006 14:17

it's something I hear so often. And I'm really not sure I get it. It's not a sentiment I particularly feel. I just don;t have this gut, burning, instinctive thing that so many others seem to. I have real faith in my kids and i think they will be happy and succesful even if they don;t get the best. I want them to have what's good, but I can't say I feel this need that it has to be "best".

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Flamesparrow · 10/11/2006 14:19

Good point... I guess I want what is best for them, but I think that is slightly different to wanting "the best" iyswim

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saadia · 10/11/2006 14:26

I suppose it depends on what your definition of "the best" is. I want them to have the best childhood - love, hugs, attention, healthy food, good healthcare, a good education - but not necessarily the most expensive things.

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mousiemousie · 10/11/2006 14:29

I don;t think this normally means buying a luxury version of everything, it's not normally about buying objects, just about wanting your kids to have the best lives, which is a different thing entirely

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Spagblog · 10/11/2006 14:30

When I say that I want the best for my kids - I don't mean materialistic things!

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hatwoman · 10/11/2006 15:56

no - I don;t think it means materialistic things either. But even about non-materialistic things I still don't feel it

I think there's a difference between wanting what's best and wanting the best. I can sign up to the former, but even then it doesn't feel like a huge priority. I think it's because for me what's best is not getting worried about it all

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Greensleeves · 10/11/2006 16:00

I think there are people who say this and mean trainers and holidays and ultra-expensive schools. In that case, no, I don't think those things matter at all.

If it means non-materialistic things like love, security, good friends, a happy, fulfilling life, optimum health, the best diet/self-worth/sense of moral integrity I can give them, then yes, of course I have that instinct. I want them to love life. I want to make that happen. Doesn't everyone?

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3andnomore · 11/11/2006 16:41

hatwoman, would depend on the context...I say I want the best for my children, which means all our love and everything else...but I don't think of it in materialistic terms...

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Piffle · 11/11/2006 16:44

I give my children the best I can give them. in other words they get my best (usually
But not best - toy/shoes/bike etc

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lazycow · 13/11/2006 14:22

I don't feel this much either. Perhaps it is because wanting the 'best' either materially or in terms of non-material stuff suggests I know best what my child needs and that by giving them the 'best' I can somehow mould them to what I want them to be.

What I most hope for my child is that they find their true vocation and passion in life and that they follow that and live their life in line with who they truly are. Does that make sense?

I hope that it won't involve drugs, BNP membership, or any of the other things I dread but I acknowledge that it may.

I see my role as a parent to help ds recognise what he wants from his life, do the best I can to help him prepare for it and then when he is old enough - let go.

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