i've posted this in the childminder's bit but now i'm openig it up for discussion with parents as i don't know what else to do now. if you have anything useful to add then please feel free
i'm a childminder and i have 2 girls aged 1 and 7 and 1 mindee aged 3.
over the past few weeks mindee kicks bites and punches my dd1 (7) she doesn't retaliate and yes sometimes he is provoked and she is punished on those occasions which have only been a few times (he is punching etc at least 1 a day apart from 2 days where he didnt do it at all)
i use time out immediately and the rest of the time i give him stickers and praise.
his mum has been hard on him too, sending him straight to bed, not allowing him to have pudding etc.
i've talked to him about anger and how its ok to feel angry but not to lash out and to do star jumps instead.
he just does it so impulsivly you can't see a build up at all. he always does it the second my back is turned but i know my dd is telling the truth because i have seen the marks.
i just don't know what to do now, i've asked his mum about adhd and she says she has looked into it and doesnt think its that, she thinks it is down to his age and its just a phase that he will grow out of (could be?) in the meantime my dd1 is starting to dislike him more and more, he spends 50 hours a week at my house so she is with him from morning to night this is her home and i want her to be happy and they can play nicely sometimes im sad that they can't play well all/ most of the time. (at least without the violence)
when he's on his own with me he is very good and affectionate, tells me he loves coming etc i don't want to give notice because i'm sure he will stop it but just how i can make him stop i don't know?? please help??
i have booked myself on a behaviour course but it doesnt start until after xmas.
please its making me miserable that my dd1 and him can't get along, it makes from 3.15 til 6pm horrible as i dread what he will do next. he has even pushed my dd2 (who is only 1) out of the way because he wanted a toy, he didnt hurt her but thats not the point.
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Please can i have advice from a parent spoint of view on this
13 replies
LoveMyGirls · 30/10/2006 21:40
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