Terrible weekend, not liking DD1's behaviour or mine very much

(4 Posts)
lovebooks999 Mon 11-Nov-13 10:20:17

Not sure where to start. DD1 is almost 6 and DD2 4.5 so only 15 months between them. 9 times out of 10 any squabbling appears to be coming from DD1 and I see a mean spiritedness in her that reminds me of myself and i do not like.
i shouted my head off maybe 4 times this weekend out of sheer frustration - pathetic that a grown woman cannot control herself but the relentless of it all justs wears me down. We went swimming yesterday morning as we do every sunday and every week there is a row about which one of them comes with me into the shower after and which one goes with dad. DD1 always wants to come with me and then DD2 is upset. Then there is always a row as to which one goes through the turnstile first (DD2 did ) and then crying from DD1 thtat sister always gets to go first and will be first downstairs etc. By the time we got to the car and DD1 would not get into her seat i just shouted my head off.

in the afternoon dad first took DD1 out for a walk and then later DD2 and i played cards with DD1 . we had a great time playing cards and at the end maybe because she wanted to keep playing, i take a plastic plate from the table and she tries to knock it out of my hand and get the crumbs to go on the floor. i put the plate in the counter top and she reaches for it to tip the crumbs in the floor. why does a child just want to deliberately annoy you?

i find her a lot harder to be with than DD2 and i feel ashamed of myself for feeling that.

she started school in september and all has gone very well but her behaviour at home is bloody wearing and every bedtime pretty much she plays up.

i am on my own basically all the time during the week and i think that causes a lot if resentment in me.

i am the adult and i need to get off this merry go round. i have all the books but no energy or resiliance.

MissPB Mon 11-Nov-13 13:06:25

Hello. Sounds as if you have not had much fun this weekend. It is awful when you feel as if you are constantly telling them off isn't it - I have times like that too although I am trying really hard.

How about instead of telling her off for the crumbs (for example) you ask her to help you to sweep them up. That shows her that if she does these things, she has to help recitfy them. Does that make sense. Easier said than done.

Are you getting time to yourself? Sounds as if you need a break from them by the weekend - could your partner take them swimming by himself to give you a break (and also stop the arguing!)

Hope this helps!

FunkyBoldRibena Mon 11-Nov-13 13:09:31

Why can't both of them shower with dad/you and both of them go for a walk with dad to give you a break and they take turns in going through the turnstile?

FunkyBoldRibena Mon 11-Nov-13 13:10:05

And she definitely needs to clear the crumbs up if she spills them.

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