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Parenting

6 month old DS hates pram. At my wits end.

11 replies

suzexxx · 06/09/2013 09:18

My DS has never really liked his pram since the first time he went in it. I've got a travel system and in the first few months mostly used the pram basket to take DS for walks, but very quickly he hated having to lie down and not be able to see what was going on. He'd cry and scream, even after i'd got him out, fed him and changed him etc.

I started using the car seat attatchement for shorter journeys, which i found he preffered as he could see out and face different ways, whilst being pushed along, however this didnt last for long.

I'm now using the pushchair attatchement and occasionally the car seat and he hates both. He screams from the time he gets in until the time he gets out. I make sure all his needs are met before we go out anywhere and he has toys attatched to his pram to look at when we go out. He screams are more like tantrum screams and he arches his back so i cant strap him in.

Yesterday as it was a nice day i took him to see my Mum and took him for a walk to the Country Park, a short walk from her house. His screaming was so uncontrollable that i ended up carrying him most of the way, whilst my Mum pushed the pram. It's getting to the point now where i dread taking him out and i'd love to be able to take him on a long walk everyday, but it doesn't happen. I only am able to go on very quick and neccessary journeys now.

I've thought about buying a new pram as perhaps he finds his pram uncomfortable, but i havent really got any spare money and it won't guarantee any change. I've got a baby carrier, which i used quite at lot more when he was smaller, but he's now so much heavier i'd struggle to go on long walks and carry my changing bag too.

Has anyone else had this problem with their DC? I'm guessing things may be this way until DS can walk as he constantly wants to be on his feet and gets frustrated if he's not. I just don't want to get scared to go out, which i'm starting to.

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delasi · 06/09/2013 09:40

Sorry that I can't say I've had the same and can offer a solution, but didn't want to read and run, and the carrier aspect jumped out at me before I even got to the point where you mentioned it. You could get an ergonomic carrier - lots of recommendations on the boards here, but for example a Manduca, Connecta, Ergobaby* - which I think range anywhere from £60-100 bought new. We have an Ergobaby which we started using at 6mo, DS is now 9mo and around 9.3kg, and long, and both DH and I find the Ergo very comfortable. We're both short and I'm not particularly strong so it does work very well, and I have a friend more petite than me with a very big 2yo boy who happily and comfortably still uses her Ergo with him.

I've never used a sling library but I always see them recommended, so perhaps you could find out if there's one local to you and see how your DS reacts to being in one of these carriers? And also how you feel in it. Then see if you can budget/save for it if it's a positive reaction. We saved for ours because we use a carrier a lot and I knew the Ergo worked for us as I had tried someone else's. I'm so glad I did and I wouldn't be without a carrier now.

*I see some people recommending against the Ergo on the basis that there are so many counterfeits, but if you buy from an authorised retailer then it shouldn't be a problem.

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delasi · 06/09/2013 09:42

PS I use a rucksack when we're using the carrier, instead of a specific changing bag, as it's much easier to carry.

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SweetTeaVodka · 06/09/2013 11:39

Another vote for a sling or carrier. My DD would rarely settle in a pram and we used to spend most of the time with the pushchair holding her in one arm and pushing the empty pushchair with the other. We started babywearing and she is so much happier, plus we all love the cuddles and interaction it gives us (me, DH and DM fight over who carries her when we go out sometimes). Plus it can be useful in the house for having two hands free!

Ergonomic carriers or slings, those that support baby facing you with legs in the M/spread squat position will be most comfortable for you and baby. There are loads of buckle carriers available now that allow this, and they all have various pros and cons and fanbases in their own right, so you may well be able to find something that your DS would like? It may be that he prefers being up and able to see the world and snuggle with you.

There are loads of sling libraries about now and these can be great as a way of finding what slings or carriers work for you. They also often have trained consultants who can help and lots of other mums who can offer you advice and support. the UK Sling Libraries network has a list of them, and some libraries do postal hires (two that spring to mind are <a class="break-all" href="//www.slumber-roo.co.uk/" rel="nofollow noindex" target="_blank">Slumber Roo and Chester Sling Library but I'm sure there are others.

To give you an idea of the range of carriers available, there are Tula, Manduca, Ergo, Beco, Boba, Rose & Rebellion, and Connecta, to name but a few! There are also other types of tie on slings.

I do as a PP and use a backpack instead of a normal changing bag when I use a sling.

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SquidgersMummy · 06/09/2013 12:58

Hi. My dd is 13mths. She too went thru a phase of this. I love my 3 wheel buggy and really walk everywhere poss - and I try to go out every day - so we had to get around it. I set off with her in the buggy at her am nap time, when I know she will cry a bit but then settle quicklyish. I start with her upright then gradually creep her seat back - but at 6mths I used to get her in her coat, feed to sleep, put in buggy laid back and leg it quick! I wld have everything ready as I knew she'd cry - but would settle if we set off quickly with no faffing. I ALWAYS take the baby carrier - I have a baby Bjorn with a back brace thing - I know lots of people hate them but I have a torn disc in my back and I find it comfortable even now at 18 lbs and I love the fact it's easy to click in and go. Whenever we go out I plan that she'll sleep on the way and that I might need to use the carrier on the way back. I tried the carrier and a rucksack but its too much weight and she cant sleep as well. The buggy holds so much - still take it even if its just for luggage! My dd is getting better at going in the buggy but if we are anywhere interesting eg supermarket, park she prefers the carrier as she can see and interact more. So don't give up on your pram but perhaps a carrier will help too. They do go thru phases it's just persisting a bit for now but also using a carrier so its not making it too stressful all round. You'll love having your hands free again xx

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Bluemonkeyspots · 06/09/2013 13:07

I totally sympathise as I LOVE getting out for long walks with the pram. Dd and I walk for miles just for the sake of it and for me it would not be the same with a sling (will add that I have 4dc and have never even owned a sling let alone use one so maybe I'm the one missing out)

Is there any chance you could borrow friends buggys for a shot, I'm sure if you put a plea out (even on the dreaded Facebook) people would be willing to give up their pram for the day.

I take it your travel system is also quite bulky? Were you planning on also buying a umbrella fold at somepoint in the future to keep in the car boot on take on holiday? If so why not buy one sooner rather than later, you would definitely get the use of it at some stage.

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cantthinkofagoodone · 06/09/2013 13:11

My LO did this and still can do tbh but as mean as it sounds, if I ignore him he gets over it. DS always wanted to be mobile (from about 3 months old anyway) and couldn't stand to not be moving unless he was sleeping.

Do you use a dummy at all? I used to give one to DS and he just played with it but it kept him quiet for a while.

I think LO would have preferred a parent facing pram but similarly I wasn't going to get a new one for a short period of time.

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stargirl1701 · 06/09/2013 13:16

A sling or carrier. I use an Ergo with DD.

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MyNameIsSuz · 06/09/2013 13:21

How long have you been using the pram seat? Mine was exactly the same - hated the pram attachment and we used it twice, using the car seat and a sling instead until he was about six months. When I switched over to the proper seat he hated it the first few times, but we persevered and he is now fine. Could you try taking him out when he's really tired and tipping it back, nice cuddly toy or muslin near the face, couple of danglies on the hood etc, make it nice and cosy. If he gets used to sleeping or dozing in there he might change his mind about it.

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suzexxx · 06/09/2013 13:29

Hi everyone,

Thanks for all the advice , it's also nice to read i'm not alone with this problem. I'll give my sling another go and perhaps take it out along with the pram incase i start aching.

My pram is a travel system, but not a bulky one. It has seperate attachements that clip into the wheels. DS currently still fits in the car seat so i either use that if i'm just going to one place or put the pushchair attatchement in my car too. We weren't planning on buying a stoller just yet as DS has only just been able to use the puschair bit of the pram since 6 months.

Once DS is having one of his crying fits nothing calms him down. I tried a dummy in the early days and he struggled keeping it in his mouth and now he completely snubs a dummy. He's got various toys attatched to the pram, but again he doesn't really care for them.

I'll also try and borrow a friend's pram for the day to see if he's any different. Worth a shot.

Thank you :)

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HPsauceonbaconbuttiesmmm · 06/09/2013 13:49

I've had 2 babies like this, and have admitted defeat early on and used a sling. Persistence does help at about your stage with building up from short walks. I also use a lambskin liner which they've both liked. But I agree it's worth trying a different buggy first, but try it several times or it'll just be the novelty that makes them not cry. Also get them to associate the buggy with something nice, so give a meal sitting in the buggy in the house, or just play with him in the buggy without going out.

Fwiw, DS became happy enough in the buggy from about a year I think but was never keen. By 18m it was gathering dust because he walked everywhere!

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lola88 · 08/09/2013 19:01

DS liked his lightweight pushchair much better than his big bloody expensivepram I bought the pushchair to fir easily in the car but eneded up using it all the time apart from when it snowed. I used to stick a folded zipper behind him so he was sitting up pretty much straight I think he liked the freedom. He's 19mo now and walks a lot but when is his buggy he sits right on the very edge so close his bums fallen off a couple of times! He leans out so far it's just the straps holding him in. I was never a fan of the carrier no matter how many slings and carriers I tried it just wasn't for me.

I got this one at 10 weeks and used it daily until my step dad broke it forcing it down I have no doubt that it would have lasted another year if it hadn't been broken by him. It was a fab buggy light easy to fold and very comfy looking. I've got a cheaper version now which is about £40 from argos but is mamas and papas too.
www.mamasandpapas.com/product-tour-buggy-black/1048h2900/type-i/

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