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Getting 18mo DD to stop using a bottle

11 replies

InTheFace · 03/09/2013 20:51

Hello, wonder if anyone has any experience/advice they could share.

My DD was mix fed from birth. She has drunk milk and water from a bottle for the last year, but I have always been keen to get her using a cup. Tried with the cup at 9mo and 12mo, but it was evident that she was emotionally attached to the bottle, so dropped it.

Now, at nearly 18mo, I have gone cold turkey (we are on day 3). She is not upset at having the bottle withdrawn, more annoyed really. This manifests itself as only consenting to drink gulps of water from a plastic Evian bottle Hmm, having previosuly drunk a healthy 2 or 3 bottles a day, and no milk whatsoever.

Predictably, I am fretting about her not having had more than 5 gulps of milk since Sunday (she would normally have 16-20oz/day), and perhaps never drinking milk ever again (not remotely melodramatic, me, no). She no longer consents to eating yoghurt (although never tried the fruity ones) and only eats melted cheese (gah!).

Am I being ridiculous? Is there a better way to stop her using a bottle? I can safely say that if she wants to do something, she will. So if she wants to drink milk, she will take it however it comes. But I am seriously considering custard / rice pudding / milkshake (none of which she has had so far) just to get some calcium and protein inside her. Otheriwse, her diet and behaviour are normal (even great, really) for a toddler her age.

Thank you in advance!

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MortifiedAdams · 03/09/2013 20:54

Could you still.do milk.in a bottle but switch to a cup for water? At mealtimes, set her lunch and a cup.of water down "theres your big girl cup for water, how lovely" worked well for dd. Lots of praise for her using it too.

I always carried a spare empty sippy cup and would pour bottled water in if out - no negotoations.

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InTheFace · 03/09/2013 21:30

Thanks Mortified. We have tried the praise thing with using cutlery, putting food back on the plate (not down t shirt / on floor / on my plate etc), and most recently packing toys away, but I think we are now well and truly busted. Tried just a couple of weeks ago with something else (forget what now) and she was totally unaffected by praise. . The child is ridiculously stubborn!

We are heading out of town for a couple of days tomorrow, I will try you non-negotiable tactic. It appeals to the meanie in me :)

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5madthings · 03/09/2013 21:36

What about a straw or a special cup that she chooses?

I letmine have milk in a bottle till they gave it up on their own and they had water from a cup the rest of the time.

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InTheFace · 03/09/2013 23:22

Personally, I am inclined to let her go with the bottle for as long as she wants, it's her doctor who keeps telling me that she has poor tone in her mouth and lips because of the bottle, and that this is why she still drools while teething. Which, incidentally, I don't have a problem with either, even if I didn't think the doctor was spouting rubbish.

To be honest, it's mostly because it just seems wrong now: she really is such a 'big girl' in all other respects, I wonder whether this is becoming a crutch she just doesn't need now. I am forever reminded of an uncle who sucked his thumb right up to his forties. Any time he was watching tv, or reading...it was strange and it affected his relationships. I think I'm overly worried about this issue because of this.

Tried the straw, not impressed. Yesterday I let her have the pick of all the feasible drinking vessels in the house. She picked....a bone china teacup AND saucer. Yelled when I tried to take the saucer back. The cheekiest of all monkeys!

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strawberrypenguin · 03/09/2013 23:29

No advice I'm afraid just popping in to say my 22mo DS is very similar. Refuses to have milk in anything but his bottle (has juice in a cup though) I've given up trying for now, he's happy and I'm guessing he won't want it forever. I offer him milk in a cup from time to time and one day he will take it I'm sure but we haven't got there yet!

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curlew · 03/09/2013 23:33

How many bottles a day?

Oh, and what's wrong with a "crutch"?

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mumofboyo · 04/09/2013 15:28

It's probably totally the wrong information to give or suggest so feel free to completely ignore what I have to say, but my ds, who is now 2.5, wouldn't drink from anything other than a bottle until I offered him a drink of my tea from my cup (it was decaf). I then started having just milk and giving him that, pretending it was my tea. Luckily he's quite gullible so fell for it Grin. Now he has his own cup specially for his milk. I also flavour it with nesquick strawberry milkshake, and he loves it.

I also got him to use a straw by offering him some of my milkshake from the Grind whilst out in town one day and he got it straight away. So I started making my own, using vanilla yoghurt, blue top milk, overripe banana, orange juice, peanut butter and a handful of frozen berries. He loves it and seems a good way of getting him to drink milk.

As I said, not everyone will agree with me and will shoot me down as a terrible mum for offering caffeine (in the form of decaf tea Shock ) and sugary milkshake, so I'm only offering it as a last resort suggestion!

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InTheFace · 04/09/2013 19:48

Thanks for the replies! Wrong to admit it, but it is comforting to know that my DD isn't the only one...

mumofboyo I have no problem with any of what you suggest. In fact, I have decided to stop stressing about her milk intake and will consider it job done if she has enough in the way of fromage frais, rice pudding and weetabix, all of which she has consumed heartily since I last wrote.

Also, this evening, she reached for and guzzled my water out of my glass. Knowing her, this means she is over it, and it will only be a short while now until she is back to drinking everything, bottle or no bottle. Such a relief.

You can take a camel/toddler to water, but you can't make it drink...

curlew nothing wrong with crutches when you need the support. Lots wrong with them if you are being lazy or not challenging yourself (big words for a toddler, but you get the drift). She was drinking 3 bottles of water and 3 bottles of milk a day, each 240ml. We live in a hot and humid country.

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curlew · 04/09/2013 22:55

"curlew nothing wrong with crutches when you need the support. Lots wrong with them if you are being lazy or not challenging yourself (big words for a toddler, but you get the drift)"

Oh, Lord- I couldn't disagree with you more!

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5madthings · 04/09/2013 23:06

Honestly I would have carried on with the bottle for milk.

Sucking is a huge comfort to babies and toddlers, one they need and one they grow out of.

Mine all had milk from bottle or breast at this age.

Ds1 stopped bfeeding at 18mths.

Ds2 was 3yrs ten mths when he stopped bfeeding.

Ds3 was three yes 6mths when he stopped

Ds4 had mlik in a bottle at bedtime until three years four mths.

My dad is 2yrs 8 mths and still has 5oz of milk in a bottle at bedtime. They all cit down on milk from breast or bottle gradually.

They weren't lazy, they didn't need to be challenged! They all developed ahead of 'schedule' in other respects, my dd talks brilliantly, is potty trained day and night but yes she has milk in a bottle at bedtime! Its a comfort, its part of her routine and she likes it. She is still little, the idea that she is lazy or needs challenging is frankly laughable.

I think its a bit mean to force the issue and make them give up a comfort at such a young age actually.

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InTheFace · 05/09/2013 17:14

5madthings honestly, I think you are right. My instinct is to let her continue until she is ready to stop, but for some reason... I don't know. I have never pandered to anyone on anything thus far, I have stood my ground and followed my instincts on a number of things since DD was born, often in the face of GPs etc telling me I'd be making a rod for my back blah blah. But for some reason I am finding myself swayed on the bottle issue.

Seriously, I am not suggesting that a 18 mo baby is lazy or not challenging herself by wanting to drink from a bottle. That was the reasoned response to the question about crutches. But drinking from a bottle when she seems so developed, it just strikes me as odd. Like that uncle sucking his thumb well into his 40s. Not hurting anyone, you say, but it did affect his relationships with women, and it did restrict his ability to stay with people, go to their houses for a weekend etc.

I think maybe I am projecting too much. Ugh. And now that I've started I really don't want to stop. In the grand scheme of things, no great harm will come of it.

Next time I will remember to stand my ground more firmly.

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