What surprised you most about becoming a parent?

[Keztrel]

Or did your expectations turn out to be pretty accurate?

[BackforGood]

I was gobsmacked how much time this little chap took up. I think I had an idea of a new baby being asleep for much of the time, and me having hours each day to swan around doing as I pleased

[Keztrel]

Hmm, I thought newborns slept most of the time too...right I'll cross that off my list of things to expect

[HarumScarum]

I was astonished by how much head space DD took up even when she was asleep/didn't need me for anything in particular. Honestly, I couldn't have believed it. Also astonished by how difficult it was to put her down (both because she didn't want to be put down and I didn't want to let go of her).

[HPsauceonbaconbuttiesmmm]

The amazing amount of stuff there is to learn about parenting.
How little sleep you can still function with.
But number 1 is the love. I would gladly lose life or limb to keep my kids safe. My heart feels like its being squeezed when they smile. They are light up my world. I thought I would love them but the intensity is phenomenal.

[Arcticwaffle]

One of the biggest shocks was the tides of clutter. Before having children we visited friends with 2 small children, and the bathrooum was covered in plastic toys etc, and I wasn't particularly judging (!) but I thought, "Why don't they just pick the toys up?"

I hadn't realised that they had probably picked them up about 50 billion times that week already.

[SillyBlueHat]

How bloody exhausting it is, even when they do sleep

[KFFOREVER]

What surprised me most when my newborn wanted feeding every hour or so. I so underestimated how exhauasting it was and no, newborns dont sleep for hours on end. Also i had to say goodbye to my immaculatey tidy flat and hello to baby paraphenalia in every room.

[Franke]

The relentlessness. Even 10+ years on.

[LineRunner]

Yeah, definitely love (bigger), clutter (more), disappearing time (where the fuck did the week go...), and noise (aaaagh).

And lack of sleep.

[Thumbwitch]

That I couldn't put him down if it made him sad. And didn't want to, in fact.
That I had far more patience than I could ever have imagined with this tiny little scrap. (None for DH though. ;) )
That I had to feed him for 2h at a time because he had tonguetie and fed really slowly
That breastfeeding can really fucking hurt if they get the latch wrong/have tonguetie

DS1 didn't do much sleeping during the day either - I used to get really riled with DH coming home and whinging that nothing had been done, after all, don't babies sleep most of the time? Not mine, no! Two half hour naps in the day if I was lucky.

I was all set to be a stern rigid parent - and ended up being an almost-attachment parent (not quite).

[AngryFeet]

How all consuming it is.

How much I love them.

:)

[gwenniebee]

The love. Oh my word. I thought I knew what love was, but it's all consuming. I missed her when she was asleep!

The headspace she took up when she was brand new. That it's impossible to concentrate on anything if you can hear your baby crying.

That breastfeeding does not come naturally to everyone, but it's damned well worth persevering with.

That your day won't always go to plan, but it's not usually the end of the world.

[Thurlow]

That sometimes you really do just know what to do. I brought loads of books, I still read parenting guides and ask for advice, but sometimes you just have a gut instinct and it is right.

That many babies don't know how to sleep and you have to teach the. Poor DD must have been hallucinating from the lack of sleep in her first week at home!

How much they can make you laugh, even doing the silliest thing. And how much they can make you cry, even doing the silliest thing.

And yes, the love. It's a cliche but it really is overwhelming sometimes. I realise that never in my life had I been truly scared or fearful of anything; now the thought of something happening to DD makes my heart stop.

And how quickly comfortable you become with another person's bodily discharges

[MissPlumBroughtALadder]

I never knew what fear was until I became a mother.

[CPtart]

That babies actually fight sleep. I presumed they just lay down and nodded off...how wrong I was!

[Keztrel]

Ah, having to teach babies how to sleep - that's a new one on me but makes sense! Thanks for all your thoughts :)

[plonko]

God yes the sleep. I never believed my mum when she said I didn't sleep til I was 2, and now she is my absolute hero.

Babies are not born knowing how to eat or sleep.

That you will find a new love for your OH when you see him become a father.

That you will become invisible. Babies and pregnant women are attention magnets and the transition from doted on pregnant lady to 'just get on with it, you're a mum' is quite startling.

Oh and just how it can take for perineal stitches to heal

[NeoMaxiZoomDweebie]

Having the FEAR all the time.

[AnythingNotEverything]

How strong I am. I had no idea, but soon found I would fight anyone or anything to make sure my child was ok. This links to patience, as mentioned by pp - I still don't understand how we consistently get up in the middle of the night to deal with a LO. Again.

The biggest thing I think is the little bubble of family. That idea that nothing and no one else matters, and the trust that only your little family get an opinion on your little family. That brought me peace I didn't know I was missing.

[TheSurgeonsMate]

I thought it was all going to be an unbelievable amount of bother, and I couldn't understand how people have the energy and patience for it.

In fact, I keep things quite simple, I don't find my own daughter a bother , and luckily I received a bundle of extra patience in the post-natal ward as I slept which has come in quite useful.

[BaldricksTurnip]

The sheer all consuming no minutes left in the day absolute knackering epicness. And the mess. And the love

[stowsettler]

How boring she was in the first few weeks. How incredible and amazing she is now (16 weeks)

[Keztrel]

D'aw.

[Nicolaeus]

Agree with the patience. And not being able to leave DS to cry.

Good job it's both points as he still isn't sleeping through the night at 21 months

I also didn't anticipate how much my heart would melt at little things. DH agrees. Only last night he got us both grinning like loons when he pointed at a banana and said "nana" (he's not talking yet except for "no")

[Thumbwitch]

Ah yes, the Fear. Stupid things - imagining that I'm going to fall down the stairs holding the baby, seeing myself doing it in my head.

How much time I could waste just staring at my baby. Watching every little move, facial change, awake or sleeping - I just loved it. I never got bored by either of them, even in the first few days/weeks - I was endlessly fascinated by these tiny humans and how perfect they were, how well they worked, that I had produced them! [sappy]