They wouldn't let me play

[HebeJeeby]

Sometimes DD (Year 1) comes home and says that her classmates wouldn't play with her. We moved to the school in January as we relocated to the area. It is a very small, friendly school which has made her very welcome and initially everything was great. Recently, she has come home saying that no-one would play with her. I spoke to the teacher who said that DD was a very friendly, sociable little girl who was doing well and had lots of friends and played with lots of children. Some days she will say that she played with someone and one little girl in particular but that this girl will often stop playing half way through if she doesn't get her own way and my DD then runs after her trying to persuade her to play again. In another instance she was playing families with 3 other girls and DD was the dog who had to go and sit in another room in the 'house' whilst the other girls carried on playing in the rest of the 'house'. The teacher also told me that one f the mothers had come into school to say that she felt her DD wasn't being very nice to my DD.

DD is happy, enjoys school and tells me she has lots of friends. She also says that she plays on her own a lot. The teachers aren't worried and on the one occasion when I have gone to observe DD at playtime, she's been happily playing with other children.

So.... am I a paranoid mother who has nothing to worry about? DH is concerned but thinks that we have to let her work it out herself as she has to learn to develop friendships. I just worry that this is a very small school and there aren't a lot of children to choose friends from if some of them decide they don't want to be DD's friend. Any advice gratefully received as this is tearing at my heart strings like you wouldn't believe.

[anonymosity]

It sounds quite normal and similar to what I'm experiencing with my DD (5). I do think girl friendships are much more complex and difficult to navigate than boy friendships. I also think that as parents, we hear when things go wrong, we hear the fears or the upsets from them - and quite often, having unloaded these things the child goes off feeling reassured and a lot better. We don't hear about all the good stuff (usually). And I think this probably goes on forever...