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Other parents giving your child food...

53 replies

anniebear · 05/01/2006 20:50

Am I the only one that finds it annoying?

I go to a local play area. I have 2dd, twins age 4. One has SN and will just stand by people if they are eating

Most of the time people will give her some crisps, even a chip before now.

I wouldn't dream of giving another Child food. Apart from the fact that I don't want mine taking food off people they don't know, they could have allergies (ok, they haven't!! but they could have!!)

One week when they were a bit younger I looked round and my other dd was sitting at a table and an older lady was giving her some chips and sausage

Am I going ott?

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mummytosteven · 05/01/2006 20:52

No. I think it's courteous to check with parents, both because of allergies/any special diet issues, and because parents can be very finicky!

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gigglinggoblin · 05/01/2006 20:54

there was a thread a while back where someone was complaining that a woman in a play area didnt give her child a piece of banana when she was giving some to her own child.

i dont normally give other kids food, but if they stand there looking hopeful i ask their parent if its ok. i wouldnt be happy about mine being given food, but then i would also feel bad if a child was stood next to me wanting some. maybe worth moving your child if you dont want her given bits?

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Elibean · 05/01/2006 21:03

I would ask a parent first. Or get the child to, depending on age.

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anniebear · 05/01/2006 21:05

Lol, I remember the banana one!!!! and yes the parents should ask the childs mother/carer

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anniebear · 05/01/2006 21:07

Of course, I call Ellie away if she is standing at peoples tables.

Pretty hard though when there are 12 tables and she doesn't really have any social manners yet!

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starlover · 05/01/2006 21:08

i agree... if people wanna feed your kids then they should ask first! not just hand them food

ds is 10 months and today someone at our bumps and babes group was eating a biscuit and he was straight over there staring at her! lol she didn't give him any thouhg

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Mog · 07/01/2006 19:01

I think you need to chill a bit about this. Not many people have allergies to chips. These people are just being kind, not trying to poison your child. You might have been out of sight or they might not have known who the parent was. In any case they weren't acting out of malice and I think it is up to you to go and take her away if it offends you so much.

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Kristingle · 07/01/2006 19:04

Sorry but I agree with Mog. I woulndt do it but I think lots of people would. they are just trying to be kind.

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MarsLady · 07/01/2006 19:05

I'm with mog actually. I tend to say thank you to the other person and if it bothers me I say... thanks, but I'm trying to cut down **'s chip intake. Always said with a smile.

I confess, if mine are happily eating something I tend to look up to see if I see the parent of the "clearly starving" lol child to see if it's okay to hand them some.

My mum was like that, I'm like that.

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Twiglett · 07/01/2006 19:07

I'm with marsy (and mog)

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kama · 07/01/2006 19:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Wallace · 07/01/2006 19:10

Slightly different but my SIL gave ds a spoonful of her yoghurt when he was 4 months old and hadn't even started being weaned

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Pinotmum · 07/01/2006 19:13

When my son was 6 mo one of my dh's relatives gave him a Jaffa Cake. By the time I saw it it was half sucked and hald smeared over his face. Funnily enough he's never accepted one since. I'd prefer people not to give my children food and I'd prefer my children not to beg but I think you have to chill sometimes as it's done with good intentions.

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Lilliput · 07/01/2006 19:36

Am I being dim, what is SN?

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Milliways · 07/01/2006 19:40

A friend of ours DS has severe CP. He is in a chair with a tray attached. At last church week away someone used his tray as a place to put their uneaten cake. The Mum was not happy as child is tube fed & it could have choked him!

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WideWebWitch · 07/01/2006 19:58

I wouldn't give someone else's child food without checking with the parent first. You never know about allergies/rules etc.

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anniebear · 08/01/2006 11:06

Lilliput.......SN is special needs

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anniebear · 08/01/2006 11:11

I don't need to chill about it! And yes, they are trying to be kind

I am not really annoyed and didn't get angry! Just wondered what others thought.

You surely wouldn't give a young child some chips and sausage at a play area?!!


As I said, my child has special needs, so yes I can take her away from the table but she wouldn't understand and just continue to go back

Maybe I shouldn't go to any play area's then?

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TeddyRobinson · 08/01/2006 11:12

I'd call my child away from another table because I think it's rude to let your child hover around someone else. If I was that person at the table and someone else's child was hovering, I'd be getting really annoyed. Most rude. Your child may not have social manners yet but you do, and your job is teach them!

I was out with my friend once having a girls lunch in a nice pub. On another table was a girl about 4 - she would not leave us alone, kept coming up and talking to us and messing with stuff on our table - we were trying to chat and FGS, I'd left my 3 at home with dh and didn't go out to entertain someone elses kid while they enjoyed a leisurely lunch!!

Off topic now I know but it does annoy me!

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anniebear · 08/01/2006 11:19

I do teach my child manners.

TeddyRobinson, I presume your child does not have brain damage after having meningitis? So it's great that you can call her away from a table and she understands. My DD doesn't quite understand that one yet

Her twin sister would know not to stand at peoples tables and stare at their food, but Ellie doesn't realise that this could be classed as impolite.

In fact she has better manners than most children when it comes to saying please and thank you, just hasn't quite got the concept of other things yet

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misdee · 08/01/2006 11:24

Sparkly dd1 dpes this as well. she hovers around other peoples tables. we have to tell her to come away. dont think anyone has handed her food yet tho.

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anniebear · 08/01/2006 11:26

she doesnt spend the whole time there at peoples tables!!

Don't think I would even bother going if she did that, would bit a bit embarrassed!!!

It is only now and again. Supose she knows if she does stand there that somebody will give her something!!

But I do call her away or take her to play on something

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TeddyRobinson · 08/01/2006 11:27

But can't you go over and get her and sit her with you?

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TeddyRobinson · 08/01/2006 11:27

Oh OK, x posts

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anniebear · 08/01/2006 11:31

Yes! I am just saying it is not quite as easy as she doesn't understand

she is not being naughty and certainly not being rude

It wasn't a huge issue either (belive it or not!!)

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