" I would like a sister"

[lottysmum]

Well i thought i was doing really well...dd is nearly 7 and seemed very happy and content being an only child ....until this week...when i got the....I would like a sister...

i have explained to C before how lucky we were to have her given my age....I fell pregnant at 40 (not planned)...also explained that mummy did not have any eggs left...thought it the best way to explain why it was not possible (I'm 48).

What seems so silly is that it never once crossed my mind about having another...infact i couldn;t understand why anyone would want to go through childbirth twice having been through it once....although I do now!

I really feel for dd now....although i don;t think for one moment I could have gone through child birth twice.... I am not at all maternal....I love dd to bits but the first 12 months was tough... being an acidental parent.

Anyone else found themselves in this situation?

[MadBadandDangerousToKnow]

Your situation is like mine, except that my pregnancy was hard-won through medical intervention rather than accidental. I am another old parent. Although I had hoped to have more than one child, by the time my daughter arrived I had lost my appetite for pregnancy or childbirth (the birth was in full-on ER-style).

My daughter very occasionally says that she would like a sister. We have explained that that just isn't possible (and I'm afraid we tend to big up the disadvantages of having a sibling, such as having your toys borrowed and broken). We've also encouraged her to select her own sisters and she now has about four - her cousin, her friend's little sisters and our friend's daughter.

There have been several threads about coming to terms with having one child. Have you read those? I'm sure others will be along in a amaoment, but if ever you want to chat about life as a one child family, there's always tea, cake and booze in the yurt.

[MadBadandDangerousToKnow]

that's a moment, of course.

[Portofino]

Mine's always asking for a baby brother! I think your explanation is fair enough. I'd "like" another, but I'm 40, DH is 51 and finances are not favourable. I had a "scare" a little while ago and we would have coped. But i would still not do it on purpose.

[FlorenceofArabia]

I don't think it does a child any harm to know s/he can't have everything they want in life whether it be too many sweets, a sister, a new computer game or a brother.

[teafortwo]

Lottysmum... Perhps this might put things into perspective...

I was the eldest of two girls.

When I was a lickle gewl I used to bug my Mum saying I really really wanted an older brother !!!

... but I know if I had one I would be have been going "Oh Mummy - I wish I had a little sister" or if I had both "Oh I wish I had been an only child"

I think this might be a grass and greener thing to take with the teeniest tiniest pinch of salt!

[teafortwo]

perhaps
perhaps
perhaps
perhaps
perhaps

... just doing my spelling corrections