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One-child families

Has anyone had their only child very young?

8 replies

lagoon · 07/07/2014 12:16

I had my DC when I was 18 and I'm now 28. Due to my partner, it's not looking likely I will have anymore DC and now thinking that in ten years DC will be carving out their own place in life, I will be late 30s and "child free" to an extent.
Has anyone else been in this situation or know anyone that was? What did you/they do with themselves and what are the benefits?

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QisforQcumber · 07/07/2014 15:42

Hi Lagoon,

I had my DS and 18 and I'm now in my late twenties with no plans for another at all. Occasionally I get a bit wistful but it only takes a couple of hours in the company of my DN's to remind me why I have no desire to go back to the baby stage.

Pros
DH and I both work FT, having 1 DC means family time is essentially one on one time.
No sibling rows
No "you love them more than me" arguments
We can afford to do things which would be out of the question with DC2 (Expensive activities, holidays etc.)
9 years are we are done and are free to travel the world Wink
I have been able to take on additional study which would have been much more difficult if we had another younger child.


Cons
In regards to travelling the world? DS think this sounds a smashing idea and is already planning an extended gap year so he can join us Hmm

I suppose the real test will be when the old biological clock starts ticking, ask me again in 10 years.

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FiloFunky · 07/07/2014 15:50

I had DS just before I turned 18.

He's 12 now and I just turned 30.

I cannot have another. But ive thought about adopting. I feel very sad that potentially in 6 years he could have left home.

But in other ways I am working FT. mortgage has 14 years left. I could be in a good position to really help him on his way in life and be constable myself.

All in all I feel quite conflicted for many reasons!

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FiloFunky · 08/07/2014 10:40

Bumping cause i am interested in hearing from others !

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Betrayedbutsurvived · 08/07/2014 10:48

I had my daughter at 17, I'm now 47 and she's 30. I look at friends my age with teenagers and genuinely can't imagine what the would be like. DD is settled with her own family and career so DH anD I are free to do whatever we want, we travel a lot, drink far too much, eat out often, and spend all our money having an absolute blast, and we have many more years of the same to look forward to. Wouldn't change a thing.

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lagoon · 08/07/2014 11:05

Thanks for the replies people. betrayed that's exactly what I am hoping for in my future. Glad I'm not the only one who had their only child at a young age!

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QisforQcumber · 08/07/2014 11:14

DH needs to see this thread! He goes all gooey eyed when I'm holding someone else's baby and makes lots of clucking noises. Freedom awaits!

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MollySolverson · 22/07/2014 16:02

I was 23 when I had dd so will be 41 when she leaves home (in theory). I'm looking forward to entering a new stage in my own life as she enters one in hers. Betrayed, that sounds awesome!

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nowitscleanugobshite · 22/07/2014 16:16

I have a friend who had her kids at 15 & 17. She and her DH then emigrated when she was 20. At 35 she decided she wanted to be pregnant and have kids she was "allowed" to have! She now has a 2 year old, 3 year old, 5 year old, 23 year old and 25 year old! All full siblings. She fosters and home educates the little ones too!! So much for those who said that her "life was over" when she was pregnant at 14!

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