I had a very traumatic c-section birth due an imcompetent Dr wanting to finish by 18:00 nearly died and I was in hospital quite a while and my husband had to take two months off from the Army to look after me and the baby. I had detached myself so emotionally from the birth that I didn't feel a thing and even joked about it until I went back to work. I have only now starting to really bond with my son and he is 14 months old. I'm A and E nurse and after a couple of months of being back at work I could no longer deal with the flashbacks, nightmares and anxiety of dealing with labouring women and intubated patients....typical severe PTSD symptoms. I am now off sick and having treatment. However, I have always said that I didn't want an only child and my husband and I have started to try for another one (he's in Afghan at moment but we gave it ago when he was home at Christmas for 2 weeks). My problem is that now I am reattaching to all that happened to me I am not sure I can go through it again. Has anyone else been in a similar situation? I just find it so sad that he might not have anyone to play with, gang up on his parents with and have some good old sibling rivalry with. I feel very selfish to feel that I am having doubts about giving him a sibling.
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