Talk

Flip

Find nursery advice from other Mumsnetters on our Nursery forum.

Nurseries

feel guilty

9 replies

lilybird · 22/03/2006 20:45

dd (3) goes to nursery 3 days a week, whilst i work.
have just booked her in to go to preschool one afternoon a week from easter on one of my days off.
think she needs to start as it will get her used to going (the preschool is atttatched to the primary school she'll be going to)
lots of her little friends will be there.
but why do i feel so guilty??

OP posts:

Report

ThePrisoner · 22/03/2006 23:37

Because you are a mummy, and it is ingrained!! I've never yet met a mummy who doesn't feel guilty about something.

Report

threebob · 23/03/2006 06:51

If you think she needs to start - then you shouldn't feel guilty. Would you feel less guilty if you were working while she was there?

Report

Sparklemagic · 23/03/2006 08:02

You can't do anything else really - you can't get her from Nursery to pre-school on one of your work days can you?? So don't worry and don't feel guilty!

I know it must feel odd 'sending' her away from you when you are at home but you are giving her the opportunity to meet with her future school peers which can't be a bad thing, can it?

If you really hate the idea, the only thing I think you could do is hold off from pre-school till the term before she starts school - so that she still gets to meet her peers but doesn't have to be away from you for more than three days a week. But I think in getting her used to the pre-school you are doing a good thing, not something to feel guilty about!

Report

lilybird · 23/03/2006 19:20

thank you ladies, there is always something to feel quilty about.
her best friend goes to the preschool so hopefully that will make things abit easier.
also give me some time to catch up some chores!

OP posts:

Report

threebob · 23/03/2006 19:35

Oh, now that I don't approve of - get a cleaner and use the preschool money to pay for it.

Report

mandini · 24/03/2006 11:25

I live outside the UK and here it is the norm to send your child to preschool from the age of 3 (usually earlier) - for 5 days a week, from 8-2pm. Having read a bit of Biddulph I am now set against sending my daughter who will be 2 and 9mths to preschool for so many hours 5 days a week, for two years before she really needs to go to school. I don't work, and I see it as my role and I love it to "educate" her in the early years, and not people who I don't know. However, I am made to feel by all my friends here that I am doing wrong (because they have all sent theirs and don't see their role as a parent in the same way as I do.)
Sleep is very important to her, and in an institution she won't get the nap she needs which is inevitably at the wrong time. She'll then come home knackered and will go to bed at 5pm to make up for lost sleep, and I will lose out. I don't see why I should do this before she's 5 - do I bow to social and cultural norms and lose out on the most informative years of my daughter's early life? Any suggestions?

Report

Kathy1972 · 24/03/2006 11:28

Biddulph=silly.
There are good nurseries and bad nurseries, good mothers and bad mothers.
Good=good mother or bad nursery. Bad= bad mother or bad nursery.

None of you should feel guilty!!!

Report

Kathy1972 · 24/03/2006 11:28

I mean 'good=good mother or good nursery'!!!

Report

lilybird · 03/04/2006 15:51

well,just took dd to the preschool,to have a look around.
she was full of it all the way there & has told everyone she saw over the weekend where she was going, then when we got there,she buried her head in my chest & wouldn't say or do anything, even though her best friend was there!
i told her i would stay & help her (they were making easter nests) but she kept saying she wanted to go home.
now i'm dreading her starting after easter.