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Q&A about puberty and menstruation with Lil-Lets expert Vicki Buffery - ANSWERS BACK

36 replies

RachelMumsnet · 26/11/2012 10:54

We're running a Q&A this week with Vicki Buffery about discussing puberty and menstruation with your pre-teen and teenagers. Vicki is the online Agony Aunt for Lil-ets and has been answering questions from pre-teen and teenage girls and threir parents teenage girls  on Lil-Lets 'Ask Vicki' section of their website. Vicki  is on hand this week to answer any questions you may have - from  how to explain changes in her body to choosing santitary protection. Send your question before midday on 3 December and we'll link to Vicki's answers on 12 December.

Lil-lets say:
"We are proud to be the only sanitary brand in the UK to offer products designed specifically for teens. With their younger and smaller bodies in mind, the range of towels, liners and tampons are shorter and narrower than the adult range to provide the perfect fit. To make things even easier,  we have brought all of this together in a 'Teen Starter Pack' which includes 2 lite tampons, 1 regular tampon, 2 regular applicator tampons, 1 teens liner pouch, 4 day teens towels, 2 night teens towels and 1 becoming a teens booklet for advise on puberty and using the products. Everything your daughter could need is in one, discreet little bag".

For more information please visit: http:/www.lil-lets.co.uk/en-GB/Parents

OP posts:
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JugglingWithPossibilities · 26/11/2012 12:01

Hi Rachel

This thread is great timing for me as my DD is 13 and blossoming into a young woman by the day - have just got back from a weekend away and I swear she's gone up a bra size since I left !

Quite luckily for her though I feel, she's still period free. I'm nervous about this change both for her and for me. I want to say the right things !

She likes to keep things to herself and I feel it's going to be difficult to talk with her very much, though I guess I'll just have to keep it brief and choose the right moments. We've talked a little over the years and she's also talked at school and with friends so hopefully that's all enough as background information ?

The little bag of different bits sounds good. Any chance you could make the link clickable Rachel ? < lazy emoticon Wink >

For a question .... I was so happy to discover tampons at 17 (Lil-lets of course !) after a couple of years struggling with rubbish, old-fashioned towels (1970's)

Wondering if DD will need to use towels at the beginning for a bit or how soon could she use infinitely preferable tampons ?

Which ones would be best ? ( especially tampons but towels as well )
I guess the ones in the starter pack have been selected with this in mind ?

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JugglingWithPossibilities · 26/11/2012 12:13

Sorry, just thinking I should have given you a wave too Vicki - Thanks for this thread, as I said it's good timing for me and my "DD" Smile

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LimburgseVlaai · 26/11/2012 12:29

Will watch this with interest. No questions at the moment - I bought a couple of books which I have read with DD and they have done the job for now (of giving her the necessary information and reassurance).

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minifingers · 26/11/2012 12:57

Hi,
My question is about when periods start. My daughter is 13 and 4 months, is wearing a size 34E bra, has had pubic hair since the age of 10 but hasn't yet started her periods. She weighs over nine stone. I would have expected her periods to have started by now. Is she likely to start her periods any time soon?

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stopcallingmefrank · 26/11/2012 14:42

My question is similar to minifingers.

My dd is 14, wears a bigger bra size than me Grin, hair in all the rights places, but does not have periods yet. Apparently, all her friends have started theirs [pinch of salt emoticon]. I tried to reassure her that everyone is different, it's nothing to worry about, etc. etc.

What I want to ask is - when should I worry? If she gets to 15 or 16 and still no periods, then what?

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JugglingWithPossibilities · 26/11/2012 14:52

Hi Frank - A friend of mine didn't start hers till really late ... 21 I think it was.
She went on to have several children with no probs.
I'll be quite pleased if DD doesn't start hers till later.
I started mine at 15 I think it was, and that was quite soon enough !
They are a bit of a pain after all aren't they ?

< tries to muster up more positive attitude for DD's benefit Smile >

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stopcallingmefrank · 26/11/2012 14:54

Yes they are a pain. I started mine really early and TBH was kind of relieved that dd wasn't the same, though I never said that to her.

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ripsishere · 27/11/2012 00:49

I want to ask two questions, one of them has already been asked. Age of menarche. I started at 11, my mum at 12, DD is around 28kgs, totally pipe free, a bit of underarm hair (new last week) and desperate to start. She does have very pointy breast buds.
Secondly, why are your products (which I do have for her) so expensive compared to similar others?

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ripsishere · 27/11/2012 00:50

DD is 11.6 and pube free. She is not a mini Stephen Fry.

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JugglingWithPossibilities · 27/11/2012 07:11

Grin @ mini Stephen Fry !

PS I don't know how you know all these things about your DD's ( a bit of underarm hair etc ) - my DD is such a private person these days ! Smile

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ripsishere · 27/11/2012 07:16

You are joking right. My DD is part of the legs akimbo theatre group. I am frequently invited to inspect her 'privates' for signs of hair and/or blood.
She doesn't invite DH thank goodness.

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JugglingWithPossibilities · 27/11/2012 07:29

Retrieves mildewed and cobwebbed manual "How to raise your child from birth to 20" from down the back of the sofa. Ahhhh ! so she did come with a manual - shame I mislaid it for a bit !!

< reads from ch.13 "individual differences will become more apparent during the teenage years" Grin >

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Dancergirl · 27/11/2012 13:56

I would like to know about gaps between periods when they first start. Dd is 11.5 and had her first period in the summer holidays, around mid-August. She hasn't had another one since. I seem to remember having a long gap between early periods myself, but is there any ways to tell when she might get her next one? It's like waiting all over again!

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JugglingWithPossibilities · 27/11/2012 15:03

Have just ordered the teen starter pack plus other supplementary bits from the website so am beginning to feel better prepared already !

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yummumto3girls · 27/11/2012 23:43

My DD is 12 and yet to start her periods. I have bought her the Teen Starter Pack, which I was very impressed with. Have spoken to her about the products and directed her to the teen section of your website which she found helpful. I'd like to ask for advice on how soon to encourage tampon use after starting periods and whether there are any issues with early use of tampons.

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UrbanSpaceManBaby · 28/11/2012 12:04

A 'naice' lady came to talk to just us girls at school. To this day I can't go in a public lavatory without thinking about the spread of germs from the applicator to the door handle from the previous incumbent. Do brusk, no nonsense ladies still have to deliver talks to giggling girls whilst the boys are shunted into the hall for a double period. (No pun intended)

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OhWesternWind · 28/11/2012 12:09

Can anyone recommend a book for my dd age ten? She's had all the younger children books, the hair in funny places etc but wants something more "teen"y and I'd really appreciate some help with this.

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Iamnotminterested · 28/11/2012 14:33

DD won't wear any towels other than Lil-lets teen range Grin, a customer for life, methinks.

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morethanpotatoprints · 28/11/2012 18:01

I would like to know if 2 ranges could be brought out, one with mixed tampons and towels and others with just towels.
I was only 9 when I started and my first try with tampons at 14 resulted in hospitalisation for several weeks and diagnosis of toxic shock. I have had the talk with dd aged 8 already as she is changing shape, I don't want to have to tell her she could die if she used a tampon, just yet.
Also it would help others in the same position as I know although rare there are other sufferers and most likely heriditary.

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JugglingWithPossibilities · 28/11/2012 18:25

Oh how awful for you potatoprints Sad

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morethanpotatoprints · 28/11/2012 18:50

Thank you Juggling.

I don't really want to frighten anyone but there is a risk albeit a small one. Its difficult though, when do you warn your dd or explain the risk.
I had 2 mothers (long story). My natural mum died very young from this but it was related to contraceptive and not tampons. I only found out a few years ago through members of her family, as we never met.
60 people are diagnosed with it each year, although it affects men as well as women. Of these 30 are related to tampons and 2 or 3 people unfortunately die each year. It is the young as in children and elderly most susceptable.

I recommend everybody google the facts, not as I say to frighten anyone but to make your dd aware, even if you wait until they are older. I also don't think the risk is publicised enough in the packs, always very small print, for obvious reasons.

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LaBelleDameSansPatience · 28/11/2012 19:29

Just collecting info for my sheduled talk to y5/6 girls in my class next week about 'feminine hygiene' - hadn't even thought about toxic shock. Never done this before and can't find any materials at school. Any tips/ideas/warnings gratefully received.

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FuckingWonderwoman · 28/11/2012 21:26

How do I persuade DD1 that tampons are so much nicer to use than towels? She tried them on holiday last year (because it was either that or not go swimming) but as soon as she got out of the pool she rushed to get dressed and pull out the tampon. I have extolled the virtues of lil-lets, how you just whack it up with your finger, and no nasty scratchy applicator, and the joys of not having a chuff covered in goo, but she's just not interested.

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JugglingWithPossibilities · 28/11/2012 21:39

That's interesting Wonderwoman - I was so pleased when a friend suggested I try tampons - made periods so much better. I hadn't really thought of people / DD not liking them. Just wondered how early she could try them - as others have mentioned.

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morethanpotatoprints · 28/11/2012 21:43

LaBelle.

I don't think toxic shock is a subject that should be covered at school, it would scare them to death. I'm not telling dd till she's older and hoping she will be happy with towels if she starts young.
The whole subject scares me because thank God cases are rare, however, because of this I don't think many people are told or warned of the symptoms, I certainly wasn't.
I read that most doctors will never experience a case, so it is v. rare.
FWIW symptoms include high temperature, which was immediate in my case. Flu like symptoms, vomiting, the runs, etc.
I just think it wise for all parents to be aware of this and monitor the use of tampons in the early days. Not much is known about it but some research was done in the 1980's and easily found through google.
Please all have a look.

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