Well. That went well, didnt it.......

(415 Posts)

So I am looking after my friends 3 year old for the weekend.
I'd just like to point out, before I post the wonderful things that have happened since yesterday, that I do actually have children.
3 in fact.

I point that out because after reading this, you might be forgiven for thinking I have no clue about children what so ever grin

So...she arrives at 5pm. Lovely, lovely girl. Lovely mum who for some reason thinks I am trustworthy, drops her off without a fuss.

Oh dear god.

All is well for a while. We eat dinner, she eats it all up. And dessert. I am cleaning the kitchen, I turn around and she is eating the dogs food out of his bowl.
And then told me the doggies dinner is very tasty grin

We are watching tv later on and I ask my ds1 to keep an eye on her while I make a cup of tea.
I come back, she is in the dogs bed.

She wants to play hide and seek. So she hides.
Can I find her? No.
Can the DCs find her? No.

Im about to call the fucking police because clearly she has disappeared when she pops out from a bush in the garden covered head to foot in mud.

We give her a bath, got her pjs on. I go to make her a hot chocolate. I turn round and find her sitting in a cupboard. Of course, I notice she is in there the very second I shut the cupboard door. On her head.

I put her to bed on the little bed in my room.

I go to bed as well because I know if I am not sitting there looking at her, something will happen.

I wake up, an hour ago. She is asleep in the dogs bed.

She just said to me "I had so much fun auntie tantrums. I are doggies dinner, you lost me, I got very dirty and sleeped in the doggy bed. And you shut me in the cupboard"
She found it all hysterically funny.

She's going to go home and tell her mum all of that isn't she??
Is there any way at all I can put a positive spin on this??

I very doubt my friend is ever going to talk to me again, let alone trust me with her child.

Oh I forgot to mention that she has just drawn all over her face with a green felt tip.

AND I CANNOT GET IT OFF.

Agnesboo Sat 14-Sep-13 07:58:14

grin

bigTillyMint Sat 14-Sep-13 07:58:25

And you have her for the whole weekend?grin

bigTillyMint Sat 14-Sep-13 07:59:21

I bet your friend will be eternally grateful for the weekend break you are giving her - she sounds like a right handful. And adorable, of course!

Coconutty Sat 14-Sep-13 07:59:36

Nope, you're doomed! Sounds very funny to me though if that's any consolation?

Mumof3xx Sat 14-Sep-13 08:00:00

She's safe and having fun I wouldn't mind if she was mine!

shootfromthehip Sat 14-Sep-13 08:00:04

Oh brilliant, you couldn't make it up! I've had a laugh if it's any consolation!

Oh no it's not funny AT ALL.

I have her until Sunday morning.

I have no idea what else could possibly happen. I do not have enough eyes or hands.

I have removed all the dogs beds, bowls and toys from the house. The dogs are looking at me like..where am I supposed to go then?

I can't believe how stressful it is

Mumof3xx Sat 14-Sep-13 08:02:26

You will have to keep us updated on the teat of her weekend with you

Mumof3xx Sat 14-Sep-13 08:02:56

Rest not teat stupid phone

Tee2072 Sat 14-Sep-13 08:03:38

If she was mine I'd laugh my ass off and apologize for not warning you.

grin

foofooyeah Sat 14-Sep-13 08:03:40

Yes I have had a laugh too - nothing wrong with sleeping in the dogs bed!

TheFallenNinja Sat 14-Sep-13 08:03:40

You still have the dog lead though? Continue the theme :-)

Sparklingbrook Sat 14-Sep-13 08:04:26

Oh good lord I would be a wreck. I was going to say you need to take her out for the day but maybe not. grin

Good grief.

You need wine. As long as she doesn't see it first.

I properly snorted at this! Sorry Tantrums. How old are your children? Have you forgotten how wee ones can get into everything? grin

Chubfuddler Sat 14-Sep-13 08:06:36

Clearly she is a mowgli child and wishes she was being raised by wolves. She's having a whale of a time.

Chubfuddler Sat 14-Sep-13 08:07:39

Seriously why have you removed the dogs beds? Assuming the dogs don't mind her I've never met a small child yet that doesn't lie on the dogs bed given the chance.

MistyB Sat 14-Sep-13 08:08:02

Will you carry on updating the weekend goes on? She sounds like the sweetest title horror!!

starsandunicorns Sat 14-Sep-13 08:09:07

Marking place for hourly updates and more adventures you do know she not going to want to do home if it help my dd at 2 would sleep in cats bed and hide in kitchen cupboards and jump out to say boo

ChippingInNeedsSleepAndCoffee Sat 14-Sep-13 08:10:06

Ach. I'm vegetarian and still say 'None of that will harm her and if she was mine I'd laugh then ask you why you thought I needed a weekend away' grin

Leave the dogs bed where it normally is, wont kill her to share it with them.

When her Mum picks her up, tell her that she needs to stop reading Hansel & Grettle to her and comment on her brilliant imagination grin

In the meantime - USE the Dog Lead on the little darling!

FruOla Sat 14-Sep-13 08:10:37

Hahaha - brilliant grin

<bookmarks place for further updates>

GerardButlersSecretLover Sat 14-Sep-13 08:12:13

OP your post remind me of me at the same age! I was known as the Terror!!! You have managed to make me smile after really bad nights sleep!!

Hellonewworld Sat 14-Sep-13 08:13:28

Keep updating us! She sounds lovely, if not a tad lively wink.

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