Very practical help needed - equipment for a natural miscarriage

[starkadder]

Long story. I am about 5 weeks pregnant but started bleeding lightly yesterday morning. Nothing yesterday afternoon but a little more this morning.

Doctor had sent me to hospital for D&C last night but when i got there the doctor on duty could see the baby in a scan (which my doctor had not been able to do - hence the instruction for D&C) - and said that it was not 100% sure that it was a miscarriage.

However, he did say that it was much more likely to be a miscarriage than not, as he could see that the yolk sac was an irregular shape.

Today is Thursday. Tomorrow we have to fly to the UK (we live in Spain) for a wedding and are then travelling around the UK seeing relatives for 2 weeks. Can't change the travel plans as is important family wedding.

I think I can cope with this. This is my 3rd MC but I had a lovely healthy baby after the first 2 and can accept that what will be, will be.

But I need you lovely, wise MNers to help me. The first 2 MCs I had D&Cs. This time, I may well be in transit. Plus I can't face that wait again - that long, horrible wait wiht no food or water till they can do the op. So I think this time I will wait for it to happen naturally.

What do I need? Heavy pads, right? Painkillers? In what event would I need to go to hospital?

Thank you in advance.

[EldonAve]

Sorry to hear your sad news
You will need heavy pads and maybe some strong painkillers
At 5 weeks it may not be much more than a normal period

If you bleed too much (>1 pad an hour) or feel ill or faint you should go to hosp

[Northernlurker]

Heavy, heavy pads and painkillers as you say, dark knickers (spare pair in your handbag), dark trousers. I would pack plenty of plastic bags in your handbag to - could come in handy in various ways, not least if you pass some remains and want to dispose of them in your own way. I'm sorry I know that's a horrible thought but it's probably best to think about that now rather than if you're faced with it mid wedding or whatever. I think that you only need to go to hospital if you are soaking through your pad very quickly or the pain is too much.

Very sorry to hear you have to do this - the timing truly sucks! Can you tell your mum or somebody at the wedding - would be good for you to have the extra support and then if your dh does need to take you to hospital there will be somebody primed to look after your child without the need for more explanations.

[starkadder]

Thanks so much for your quick and helpful replies.

It's DH's brother's wedding so my mum won't be there Could tell his mum but we decided not to as she is in a massive state of nerves over the wedding as it is. We may tell her afterwards.

Am hoping that nothing will have happened much by then anyway but obviously can't be sure. With my 2nd MC, heavy bleeding started while I was waiting for the D&C, which I guess was about 24-36 hours after first spotting began. But it could be different this time, of course...

The good thing is that the wedding is in the village where MIL lives so I can always hotfoot it back to her house in an emergency. At least it's not in a hotel miles away or anything like that.

[thefatladyscreams]

Oh so sorry and what lousy timing to have to deal with the practicalities.

I'd echo everyone else's comments. Get night time sanitary towels and get some strong pain relief (you may not need it but better to be prepared). I think you can take impruprofen and paracetemol at the same time - ie can alternate the dose every 2 hours. Perhaps ask your pharmacist.

I miscarried natually and was worried what constituted heavy bleeding. The nurse said if I was filling a pad every 15 minutes and grabbing towels. Sorry for the graphic detail but like you I was concerned what was the cut off for being stoic and dealing with it at home and when you needed to go to the hospital.

Hope you're OK - take care.

[Heathcliffscathy]

i had a miscarriage at 7 1/2 weeks and heavy flow pads were fine. i bled for two weeks but heavily on for 10 days or so. take some paracetamol with you. think you should be fine physically, go easy on yourself emotionally, so sorry

if you get a temperature go to hospital straightaway.

try to get into an early pregnancy walk in for a scan at some point to make sure everything is gone.

[starkadder]

thank you again I have been very sad but I think emotionally I can deal with this.

It is so much easier than the first two times because I know I can have a baby, at least. So it's sad and horrible and miserable but it's not the panicky grief I felt before.

You are all brilliant. MN really is quite great. I only discovered it when my DS was a baby (i.e. not when pregnant before) and it was a lifesaver then - latterly I have got a bit drawn into the "AIBU" threads and all that, which are fun but - this really reminds me of how amazing an online forum can be.

Thank you so much.

[tinierclanger]

Hi starkadder. Really sorry to hear your news.
I miscarried naturally, also while I was away from home. Unlike you I didn't have the sense to prepare properly! So although I had pads I didn't have painkillers. Make sure you have both ibuprofen and paracetamol, or co-codamol instead of the paracetamol, as you may need to take both at the same time.

Hope it's not too tough on you.

[tinierclanger]

PS. A friend who is a midwife told me physically it's better for you to miscarry naturally. Hope that's true.