natural miscarriage or ERPC?

[lalatele]

hi, was told last week that my "baby" was too small for the dates and no heartbeat...2nd mc for me...i am devastated...last time i bled before i knew i had mc so had a natural mc...now am still waiting for the bleeding...how long does it normally take to bleed? am dreading it and currently have a bit of cramp, nothing bad but can't tell if it's because i need the loo or what...last natural mc was not too bad(period cramps) but i heard it could be real bad and am dreading it, especially as i am on my own with dc most days...is it wiser to go for an erpc? how long should i wait?

[thisisyesterday]

how far along id you think you were?

[lalatele]

i am officially 10 and a half weeks and last week, baby was no older than 6 weeks...
but still no bleeding and do feel pregnant

[thisisyesterday]

aww what did they suggest?
I guess personally I would want to wait... just in case. but maybe that would make things worse? I don't know

hopefully someone who has been there done that will be able to offer you some better advice

[neolara]

I'm sorry for the loss of your baby. It's a horrible thing to happen.

I don't want to alarm you, but a mc at 6 weeks is physically very different to a mc at nearly 11 weeks. I have been in your position and chose to have the mc "medically managed". This meant I was given drugs to start the mc off and then I stayed in hopsital for a day while the mc happened. I was relieved that I did not have to deal with that level of blood loss at home. Fortunately I did not have any pain during the mc, although I understand this is relatively unusual. If I are alone with your dc when you start to mc it could be quite frightening. Also, you might not mc naturally for another few weeks. If you want to avoid a general anaesthetic, it might be worth talking to your hospital to see if you could be given this medical option.

There might be advantages to an ERPC. You won't have the uncertainly of wondering when the mc will happen, it is a quick procedure and it shouldn't hurt. But on the other hand, it is an invasive medical procedure and you will have a gen anaesthetic. FWIW I had an ERPC about 2 months ago for another mc and it wasn't nearly as bad as I had thought it would be.

[lalatele]

thanks neolara, will probably wait a few days but as u say, am dreading the bleeding and pain...

[lalatele]

it all sounds so scary! having to go through mini labour without having a baby at the end is terrible!!! i will have to see...i really would like to have it at home as last time wasn't so bad but a labour!!! no way! thank you all for your support...

[TheBlonde]

I had some brown blood loss so had a scan which confirmed mmc but it took me a further 6 days for the bleeding to start by which time I was 10 weeks or so

I had painful cramps for one evening - took strong prescription painkillers. I lost a lot of blood and it wasn't manageable at home.

Unless you have strong reasons for wanting to avoid an ERPC then I recommend that option

[expatinscotland]

I'm sorry for your loss.

I had a missed m/c last year about this time.

Like you, the foetus never grew past about 5-6 weeks.

I went for the ERPC. I was supposedly 12 weeks along and never bled.

I just wanted it over with instead of waiting around.

It was short and put a clean end to things.

For me, that was the best option.

Wishing you the best in whatever you decide.

[Gemzooks]

very sorry for you.

had missed miscarriage this march.

I decided to go for it naturally because I have a real dread of intervention/surgery. It happened 4 days after the 12 week scan that showed no heartbeat.

I've also m/c at 8 weeks and this was nothing like it. It was very, very painful, like a mini labour, with contractions. It lasted 5 hours and then the placenta came out. Couldn't see anything upsetting but lots of clots. It really was so painful at one point I didn't know what to do, and lots of blood loss.

However, I felt better afterwards and at least knew there was no risk of puncture or infection from something going wrong with a D and C/ERPC.

Everyone is different, and you have to just think what is more manageable for you, waiting and expelling it yourself or having it done.

One thing I would say is really look after yourself and get plenty of rest for at least 3-4 days afterwards, it is a tough thing to go through. Wishing you all the best!

[Saz78]

Hi Lalatele,

Im currently having a miscarriage and was told by my hospital to go home and come back in 2 weeks unless the pain became too unbearable or i started "flooding" (dont you just love the NHS!) ... i was supposed to be 9 weeks, but a vag scan after some bleeding revealed it had stopped developing at around 5 1/2 weeks. Everyone is different of course, but things havent been too painful for me so far, i had some bad cramps last night and a few today, but the blood loss hasnt been too bad, a bit like a heavy, painful period but with more clots and cramping. the worse thing about it for me has been not knowing what to expect and i guess that would be the only good thing about having surgery. Take time to decide whats best for you and take care of yourself.

Saz

[lalatele]

hi all thank you for your advice...have decided to book an appointment for next friday so that if i bleed in between, then fine...if not then i will go through the procedure...enough of waiting.