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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss

SO UPSET!! I cant keep up the smile anymore for others :(

6 replies

mummyneedinganswers · 26/07/2014 15:04

Dp and I have had 4 mc in 2 years at the moment were waiting on test result on our chromosons and stuff. But atm im finding it really hard to cope. 3 of my friends gave birth over the last 2 weeks. I also have a friend hu is on her 1st pregnancy and is only 18 and she keeps coming to me for advice as she knows ive been pregnant. I dont think she realises its hard for me to talk about pregnancy all the time and that I get upset having to guide her thru hers wen I am struggling to fall pregnant now. What am I meant to do should I tell her its to hard for me to constantly give asvice or am I a terrible person pretending im happy to help and for her wen really I just wish it was me considering she didnt want to be pregnant and she still doesnt know if shes going to keep it . Im so comfused and angry...

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DontBeBlueBeARainbow · 26/07/2014 17:44

mummy I'm so sorry to hear what you've been through

you're not a terrible person, i think 99% of us on here find the things you mentioned very difficult. I think it's quite insensitive of your friend to ask advice 'knowing you've been pregnant' (assuming you don't have DC) although she is young. But i would absolutely explain that it is hard for you - perhaps you have a mutual friend you could suggest she speak to?

I'm just so sad for you and I'm not surprised you can't keep on smiling, it can be exhausting and you need to allow yourself space to grieve, not an easy thing when pregnancy seems to be everywhere. Anger is a normal part of the grieving process, so don't feel bad about that.

I'm so sorry again, and hope you get answers very soon xx

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ToriB34 · 26/07/2014 19:30

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

dildoos · 26/07/2014 20:43

Sorry mummy that your suffering Sad it's awful and some people really don't understand. Sending sincere thoughts to you.
I see you are under going the tests required and I hope you get some answers.
How long til you get chromosome results? I found that test was our longest wait probably 6-8 weeks but felt like years xx

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bakingtins · 27/07/2014 07:40

Do you have DCs? If your only experiences of being pregnant have ended in MC and she knows that, she must have the hide of a rhino and you need to tell her that she's upsetting you!
Do come and join the RMC thread for some support, if that would help. It gets pretty lonely if nobody you know IRL is dealing with multiple losses.

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ColdCottage · 27/07/2014 10:24

I'm sure if you explain that as much as you would love to offer her advice and support normally at the moment it is a little too painful for you, that she would understand. Perhaps point her towards another friend, or here for advice.

Good luck, hugs.

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Greyhound · 27/07/2014 14:09

So sorry :(

I had a pregnant friend pump me for information about miscarriage, because she knew is just had my 4th loss - I was so hurt by her insensitivity. Of course, her pregnancy was fine and she kept updating me on size of her bump etc Angry

I would tell this young girl that you are not in a good place to discuss pregnancy and hope she takes that in board.

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