Hi
I have posted on here before. I miscarried 7 weeks ago today at 5+1. It was confirmed with a scan 2 days later. I feel I have been doing ok, have been on a course which i'm grateful for, for the distraction and now waiting to start a new job. last week i started thinking of my scan which is tomorrow ( I had already received my date in the post). I was meeting up with my friend the day i started to think of it and thought once im out i should feel better. She knows what has happened. Her brother and his girlfriend (who I had never met before) ended up meeting up with us and spending 5 hours with us. His girlfriend is 16 weeks pregnant, 4 weeks ahead of where i would have been. It was constant baby talk the whole time which i know is understandable. It was just so hard hearing them talking about all the things we would have been talking about now and the plans we would have been making and the things to buy.
Before they got to us My friend asked me not to let on I already knew and let them tell me. I assumed she meant to just to let them bring it up. I hoped they may not want to say anything just yet so i wouldn't be put in that position. Then as soon as they had basically sat down my friend goes so have you got something to tell impatiently(!) so I had to act all surprised and excited when he told me. I also got handed the scan photo to look at.
They spent 10 mins on my friends phone at one point looking up buggy's online while i sat there. At one point the girl went to look in a baby shop which again cant be unexpected but my friend also bee lined for the shop despite her brothers protests. Luckily he put his foot down to them looking just yet as hes superstitious. I must admit I breathed a sign of relief. I had to excuse myself to the loo a couple of times during the time we spent with them just to get a breather.
I have felt emotionally drained and gloomy since then and feel sad thinking of my scan. I also feel dissapointed with how i felt after meeting with them as i really thought i had made progress and cant help keep thinking of it and how the day unfolded. I suppose a part of me is unreasonably feeling a bit upset with the way my friend handled the situation. I feel so many mixed emotions and keep feeling guilty and/or selfish for feeling them. I feel i have no one to really talk to that understands.
I just thought getting it out might help. Thanks for listening and so sorry for those of you that find yourselves on these boards xxxx
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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss
Miscarried 7 weeks ago was feeling better. 12 week scan tommorow feeling so sad again
6 replies
impatientlywaiting14 · 07/07/2014 21:35
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