13 week loss...

[ilovechips]

Well that's it really. Went for routine 13 week scan on Wednesday morning. Straight away the sonographer said she wasn't happy with what she could see...she spent what felt like an age taking detailed measurements and explained there was excess fluid all around the baby and some structures were absent. We were then told to come back the next day to see a consultant. All felt a bit surreal really, like it was happening to someone else. Next day saw the consultant who scanned again and said the baby was very sick and not able to survive and I'd very likely miscarry soon. We were offered a termination the following day. I had this done yesterday. They think either Edwards or Pataus, they are going to test the baby. It all feels like a blur, within 48 hours going from thinking all is well to not being pregnant any more. Our 13 year old daughter was really upset when we told her, as were dh's family. I haven't told mine yet, I know I need to today am just dreading it, makes it more real somehow. Another family member is 20 weeks and don't want her to feel awkward around us either. Sorry for the ramble just wanted to write it down...

[TheOrchardKeeper]

Oh I'm so sorry for your loss

At least you sort of know there was a reason and aren't left wondering and could make the choice to wait it out or terminate. I know that doesn't make it better though

Good luck for telling your family.

[FluffyDucky]

Ilovechips, hug to you. We went through the same ( found out at 14 weeks, terminated at 15 weeks) last month. You are going to feel pretty numb and shit for a while, it all moves so quickly and time feels weird.
Come on here and ramble as much as you want, it really helps to get it out from swimming around your head!
How are you doing otherwise? xx

[ilovechips]

Thanks. We are doing ok, sad obviously but ok. Physically I just feel like I've had a good kicking (well, how I imagine anyway!) x

[FluffyDucky]

Yeah you will probably feel a bit shit and sore for a few days. Just make sure you rest and sleep when you are tired. If you struggle to sleep at night over the next few days the GP can give you pills which help. x

[Bakingtins]

I'm so sorry, OP it must all feel surreal at the moment. So horrible when you have no inkling that something is wrong. Be very kind to yourself in the coming days and do continue to post, it does help to know others understand what you are going through.

[ilovechips]

Well here we are 6 days later...both feeling rubbish, the shock has worn off and now just the grim reality. It doesn't help that im still bleeding quite a bit and my belly seems determined to not go down and am still in mat jeans :/

Hopefully things will feel better soon.