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a little advice on dating, please...

7 replies

squidler · 16/02/2008 21:16

I have been following the recent topics of internet dating with real interest over the last few weeks or so....

I am a single mum, posted here last year a little bit under a different name, but found I was spending quite a lof of time here, so deleted my registration... I wasnt dating at the time, and was quite happy that way. In the meantime, I have found that I am now comfortable enough with 'me' again to want to share some stuff with another, so I registered with an online dating agency. Its a really small one compared with some of the ones I have seen discussed here, mainly for 'greeny outdoorsy' people concerned with ethical issues/naturey stuff. Anyway, I made contact with someone there, talked for a few weeks and last weekend we met up for a first 'meeting' - coffee and strolling about. He was exactly like his pic and we got on very well!

Yesterday we went on a second 'date' - a low key dinner date, and even had a little kiss. This is the first date I have had in FOUR years! I was like a teenager again - v. nervous but it was fun-nerves. #

we have arranged to meet again next w/e but.... I have question for people that have dated this way or even met DP/H through internet - Without the 'safety' of shared information, eg friend/colleagues, when does it feel right to ask someone to your home? I am not thinking of doing this in the immediate future, as we are both happy to see each other in safer places (ie more public spaces) but at some point I would like to ask him for supper/to spend some time here with me when the children are at their dad's (which they are regularly - some weekends etc..). I suppose I know when I will 'know', but just looking for experiences really...

Sorry for the waffle, but I do like this chap and it feels exciting/scary at the same time without the added notion that he might be an axe-murderer. Mind you, when I mentioned that to him, he agreed and said that he didnt know that I wanst one either!

Anyone?

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ZippiBabes · 16/02/2008 21:22

i don't know i have met two guys and they have both been to my house

the first one the first date

and the second one after quite a while

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ZippiBabes · 16/02/2008 21:22

it was only quite a while with the second one because of circumstances not because he seemed dubious at all

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squidler · 16/02/2008 21:26

Thanks ZippiBabes

Yes - I dont have any 'reason' to doubt him so far, and it is just being cautious and sensible. And a part of me really doesnt want to be sensible!

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WiiMii · 16/02/2008 21:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ZippiBabes · 16/02/2008 21:32

oh i agree with wii

i am sadly a reckless personality

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squidler · 16/02/2008 21:55

WiiMii - I totally agree. I have been harrassed before (through work) and it is scary. The person didnt know my address and your comments have reminded me about that...

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lostdad · 18/02/2008 08:54

You think you've got problems. I am that axe murderer.

In all seriousness - a lot of the stuff that you'd worry about wouldn't even occur to men unless they'd known single mothers.

I've been meeting up with someone I met via a dating site and it's more friends than anything else. Her daughter lives with her which means of course, she can't do all the usual going out dating stuff. On the other hand - does she invite strange men into her home? An extra factor is that I don't want to `invite myself' round her house partly because of her daughter and partly because it'd be rude even without her daughter being there.

Of course, being a sensible well-balanced and reasonable chap I am however I find myself thinking that there are a large number of nutters out there who make all these precautions necessary.

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