Ex H doesn't want to take booster seat for 6 year old DS on holiday

[citylover]

.. because it's too inconvenient for him.

he is taking them on holiday next week with new DP and they are getting taxi to the airport about 30 miles away.

I don't think you are legally obliged to use one in a taxi however if the journey is planned then I think you should.

Can't believe he would put DSs safety and comfort (It's horrible being in a car if you are low down) above his own inconvenience.

Following from my earlier thread about bathsit's more important to look and smell right than to be safe!!

he also wants to take their clothes tonight so he can iron them all ("we are staying in a good hotel you know").

Also despite us going over summer holiday arrangements several times he has now asked me whether I have booked the summer holiday( which I have) as it appears to be inconvenient to him and his new DP. He has agreed to look after them for the first half of the summer hols and now this seems to be inconvenient. Well its tough because I can't change and gave him several opportunities to discuss before I booked it!!

[Dropdeadfred]

tell him it's illegal...or why not phone random taxi firm and ask?

[citylover]

Yes might do that. Anyway he is going to take it, I am insisting on it and I think my older DS will also mention it.

I really can't see why it's auch problem for him. It weighs next to nothing and airlines are used to taking them.

He used to be like this when the DCs were younger - ie moaning about all the luggage.

He is such a PITA, I don't think he has started such antics with his new DP yet. She is pg and am sure will not want to put up with similar once they are going on holiday.

And yes I am nervous about them going away - I am used to one being away but have never had both of them away from me for a week.

[citylover]

correction - 'such a problem'

[citylover]

Have checked and though it isn't illegal in a taxi but it is in a private car.

The requirement to use them in a private car must be there for a reason ie I would not drive him in my own car without a booster seat. Would you MMJ?

So what's the difference? A taxi is just as likely to have an accident as a private car IMO (though of course I don't have the stats to prove it).

If I were going on a planned journey to LGW either in my own car or in a taxi I would use a booster for my DS.

[gomez]

Does he then need to lug it onto the plane and take it on holiday too where it is not needed.

Can you not arrange for the taxi firm to supply one?

[gomez]

I probably wouldn't either TBH.

[MascaraOHara]

Sorry CityLover I never take one on holiday with me. Would he have problems getting it on the plane too?

[LilRedWG]

Here are the car seat laws.

[citylover]

If it was black cab wouldn't have a problem.

Just saloon type cars.

Ah well we agree to differ. Am sure it is partially bound up with general anxiety about them going away.

[MascaraOHara]

I do feel for you CL. Am I right in thinking it's you x that has the issues around them being bathed/clean etc? or am I mistaken?


What happened with that bloke?

[citylover]

Yes he has issues around those things. It makes me feel as though I am unclean and a slovenly person/mother when in fact I know am none of these things. Just a bit untidy but very clean. I think he has OCD I really do.

The other guy vanished and I have heard nothing from him since November. I think he is in his cave. LOL. He has done this to me once before so who knows!!

Not laughing really heartbreaking in fact. I sure do pick 'em. See other thread am half heartedly on internet dating but am not keen. And the calibre of guys who are contacting me is rather . That sounds hard hearted I know but you should see 'em. Being with exH has made me soo wary.

Think I need to give myself more time. As it's only eighteen months since separation and a year since divorce. Add an overwhelming and intense 'fling' to that and its all too much really.

How is it going with your man MOH?

[gillybean2]

Will they be hiring a car while on holiday or using a pricate car at all? If so will they be hiring car seats while there? Car seats going round the airport carosel are a common sight whenever i've travelled, airlines are well used to carrying them, and it's much cheaper than hiring them from the car hire company.

I would suggest you write a letter stating your concerns about the car seats not travelling and checking he will ensure car seats are hired if a private or hire car is used while on holiday to ensure the safety of your daughter as per british law. Also check he has taken out adequate travel and medical insurance to cover the children while away.

As far as the school holidays go, arrangements have been made. If he can not now meet his obligations he will have to make other arrangements (his mother, a holiday club, aunts and uncles etc) just like the rest of us have to do. While the children are with him they are his responsibility and he can't expect you to jump in every time he can't manage to be a parent. Being an equal parent means dealing with things like this. In future I would suggest you confirm in writing with him at least 3 months in advance which holiday weeks (specific dates and times of collection) the children are spending with who and state in your letter that if you don't hear from him within 2 weeks you will assume he is happy with the agreed arrangement.

Allow some flexibility in emergencies or exceptional situations of course, as you would hopefully expect from him to do for you. But if he can't give you a reasonable reason for wanting the change (eg new gf is due to give birth or he has an operation coming up) then don't be swayed into making his life easier by picking up after him still. He is an equal parent and should act like one which means taking responsibility when it is his time to have the children.

[Dropdeadfred]

If he is using the same cab company to get back from the aiport he can arrange or them to keep the booster seat until the return journey. I know this as we did it with dd3's car seat with a cab firm.

Problem solved for both parties...

{bows on way out....}

[goingbonkers]

A lot of taxi firms can provide car seats on request (usually have to book in advance) at no extra cost.

Airlines do allow car seats but maybe advisable to check in advance if this counts as hand luggage??

If the airport is just down the road I wouldn't worry too much, but if it's a fair distance, taxi or not, accidents happen. (Not trying to stress you out!) Also, booster seats are designed to put them in the correct position and so the 'adult' seatbelt doesn't cut across the neck.

Would def get him to hire car seats with hire car if applicable.