When your children are with their dad, do you always feel you should be getting on with the housework etc?

[Pinkchampagne]

I am child free until around 7pm as the boys are with their dad, and I feel (like I often do!) that I should be doing the housework, and maybe tackling some of my huge ironing pile...but here I am having a cup of tea & sitting in front of my PC!!

[mummyofaprincess]

PC when my DDs in nursery i say to myself ill do that polishing and ill hoover, but when i get back from taking her i just sit here with a cup of tea in silence with the pc on

My xp doesnt yet have DD on his own but when he does im sure i will be the same

I do the housework with DD instead

Doesnt help that im 7 months pregnant and dont feel like doing anything when ive been out for a 40 min walk lol

I know i know, no excuse

[Pinkchampagne]

I am the same! I have all good intentions, but often don't do half of what I planned!
Just did a little ironing because I felt I really should, but quickly bored of it, and have now left the rest for another day!

[lou33]

god not at all

i buggered off to see a mate last time he saw them

[mummyofaprincess]

me and DD are both ill and i had loads of washing up to do, so yesterday i forced myself to did it, sooo boring.

Might get a dishwasher

[MAMAZON]

mine only see their dad for 3 hours a month so i use my very limited childless time to get all teh things done i can't whilst they are here.

so things like scrubbing teh cupboards out, wiping the bannisters down, scrubbing teh carpets....DO NOT GET DONE!!

instead i wax my fanjo,pluck my eyebrows or just sit back and watch tv/listen to the radio.

[lou33]

i agree mamazon, do your own things

moap, i actually cried last time my dishwasher broke down, the thought of all that washing up........

[Pinkchampagne]

I don't have a dishwasher!

I don't feel so guilty now that I realise I'm not alone in not getting all my housework done while I have some child free time!
I always feel that I really should be doing something, but often take the more relaxing option!

[shelleylou]

i usually do the daily chores etc when ds has gone to bed then chill out. His dad has him every other weekend so i try and have as much me time as possible along with a decent general tidy up so i can relax in a tidy house.

[mistressmiggins]

no I dont
I make sure I can do things for me - like having a 3hr hair colour/cut without having to ask my parents to have the children
I go out in the evening without having to get a babysitter
I get up late & read the papers

yes I do some housework but I certainly dont spend all my free time on the house

you deserve the time you have free to look after yourself cos when you have DCs full time without a partner, it's tiring!

[Pinkchampagne]

Oh yes, MM, it is tiring all right!
Someone at work was saying that it must be good being a part time mother, with the boys sometimes spending time with their dad. It is nice to have some child free time here & there, but having to deal with the children on your own day in day out, can be bloody hard work!

[littlewoman]

I go and spend the night with my boyfriend. That way I don't even have to look at the housework I ain't doing

[Pinkchampagne]

I often do that when ex H has them at weekends, littlewoman!

[mistressmiggins]

It's the one thing I have to bite my tongue over.
"lucky you getting a weekend free"

we dont have children to get a weekend off
I would give anything to have my children every day. However as your life is not like that, you should make the most of it for yourself.
I do find if I've done things for me when children are away, I feel raring to go when they return.
I also find I'm usually ill when they are away it's as if my body keeps going while I am looking after the children, and then it relaxes when I have a weekend off....annoying but at least I can slob around without having to deal with DCS

[littlewoman]

I have 6 children, and am recovering from clinical depression. I never get a whole weekend off, only one night, so I'm not going to feel guilty about looking forward to that. Anyway, they go great places with their dad that I can't afford to take them - also, I am a bit Bohemian, so I expect they love the structured feel to the time they spend with their dad. (For dad read 'control freak', for mum read 'disorganised muddlehead'!)

[allgonebellyup]

mistressmiggins - i have to disagree with you, just because you have children it does not mean you cant look forward to weekends out with your friends, it is great to have a break and i LOVE my weekends when they are child-free.

Tell me i am a bad mum!

[tetti]

I ought to study really,have a workrelated qualification that I must pass by the summer,and I have heaps of paper work that needs doing.Instead I just catch up w mates,pamper myself and have a nice,long lie in!lol

[mistressmiggins]

allgonebellyup - you must have misread my post as I totally agree about child-free weekends & having a break

what I said was it annoys me when people tell me how lucky I am - all I meant was I would rather be in a family unit than my DCs going hundreds of miles away without me
thats all

[citylover]

Well my exH does not give me enough time to myself to do much - actually that isn't the real issue I am that he seems not to want to spend so little time with them - typically one to three hours during the week if he picks them up from school or cm and 24hours every other weekend. Can't seem to handle them for longer periods or is having social engagements.

He often shows (to the DCs)that he is in a rush to get away how must that make them feel or when I get home he is doing his emails or something.

When I get that precious time I don't usually do housework usually go shopping/browsing or meet with friends.

However he is taking them away for half term with his new DP (that should be an eye opener for her as they can be very boisterous and she has only met them about twice) and I will have a whole week to myself except for going to work. I am compiling a list of things to do that week (put up blinds, meet friends for an unhurried drink, have small tattoo (ok mid life crisis is occurring) but am also dreading being apart from them both for one week.

Also worried that they will get ill/injured but I know that's just me being irrational.

[citylover]

sorry should be to want to spend so little time with them