My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

Lone parents

Let's all celebrate the GREAT things about being single parents (and have a change from the usual grumblings and difficulties)

48 replies

OverMyDeadBody · 28/10/2007 23:35

I'll start:

  1. Never having to consult with anyone else before making decisions

  2. Being able to do things with DS on a whim or spur of the moment without having to factor in someone else coming home from work/needing supper/needing to be informed

  3. My decisions on discipline are final. DS can't use the "but dad said I could/always lets me.." arguments that I used to use with my parents

  4. There's enough room in my big bed for DS to cuddle up to me in the early hours

    I'm sure there are more, I'll add them as I think of them...

    What are yours?
OP posts:
Report
Skribble · 28/10/2007 23:42

I can mumsnet all night without getting tutted at.

I can make dinner when it suits me and the kids and not feel guilty that I didn't wait.

Less washing, actually see the bottom of the laundry basket.

Loads more wardrobe space.

Having control without someone calling you a control freak.

Report
Skribble · 28/10/2007 23:43

Oh and..

No action films booming on the surround sound making me cringe when I think of the neieghbours.

This is very theraputic .

Report
Happynow · 28/10/2007 23:44

Really? One of the first things that comes to mind is that when I've run my bath in the morning I don't have anyone popping into the toilet. It just takes the shine off your bath when you have to put up with someone else's poo smells. Of course, our own smell absolutely fine

Report
OverMyDeadBody · 28/10/2007 23:47

Happynow my DS does that though!

Agree with all yours skribble, especially about being on MN all night with no tutting!

OP posts:
Report
Skribble · 28/10/2007 23:48

Good one, I hated getting asked does anyone need to go as I might be in a while.

Report
lou33 · 28/10/2007 23:48

even the hard bits are worth it to me, i dont see any down sides really

Report
OverMyDeadBody · 28/10/2007 23:50

And not having a tv or any games consoles in the house, my decision (this may change when DS is older, but for now, I'm in control!)

No boxers to pick up off floor/wash/hang up/put away.

A very girly bedroom.

OP posts:
Report
OverMyDeadBody · 28/10/2007 23:51

Come on Lou33, list some of the good bits! Go on...

OP posts:
Report
Skribble · 28/10/2007 23:53

I now have a lovely bedroom apart from a remaining pile of crap that exH better get shifted or I am binning it, if I has room in my wheely.

Report
lou33 · 28/10/2007 23:57

i love feeling independent and knowing i dont need to rely on anyone to cope

Report
Skribble · 28/10/2007 23:58

I am enjoying knowing I can cope, I was only a gibbering wreck for a month.

Report
lou33 · 29/10/2007 00:05

i love being able to dress how i want

Report
persephonesnape · 29/10/2007 00:06

luxuriating that when my kids get fabulous reports, do well at school, on a test etc - it's down to me! i don't have to share my joy with anyone else ( selfish, i know - don't care!)

Report
zookeeper · 29/10/2007 00:31

ooh I like this thread!

Here goes..

I can open a bottle of wine , enjoy a glass, put it in the fridge and it will be where I left it the next day (Exdp was an alcoholic)

I have pink fairy lights over my bed

I clean up without that simmering resentment that comes from cleaning up after an able-bodied male

I can spend hours on the phone/mumsnet if I choose

I can congratulate myself on having removed myself and the children from an unhappy relationship and focus my energies on them

No more shirts to iron (or feel guilty about not ironing )

I have lost that terrible loneliness that comes from being in a bad relationship

I am rediscovering old friends

I can cook what I want when I want. I can now eat with the dcs and not worry about preparing another meal for dp

I do not have to think of buying Christmas presents for his family from the both of us

I can work out exactly what money is coming in and exactly what money is going out and am in control of it

I have discovered the delights of cosleeping with my three year old dd and two for one dominoes pizzas on sundays

Report
minorityrules · 29/10/2007 01:00

no snoring

bed to myself

watching tv in bed, loudly

having a nice long bath and no one thinks it's foreplay or an invitation to sex

less washing

every other weekend off

not going out to my car to discover no petrol

no football/rugby/cricket on the tv

able to watch everything I want to watch or even turning it off to read a good book/magazine/listen to music

no sharing computer

no clearing up after him

tidy bedroom

pretty bedroom with lights

room in the wardrobe

being able to sit with little clothing or even naked (when kids aren't here) without someone thinking I'm up for a bit

This is fun! Am sure there are plenty more

Report
brightwell · 29/10/2007 04:08

No more dreading his key in the door at 6pm.
No more being treated like a skivvy.
Being an independant woman.
Being able to be naked without being made to feel ashamed of my body.
Knowing my dc are growing up to be sensitive, caring, polite, intelligent and adventurous individuals because of me!

Report
OverMyDeadBody · 29/10/2007 08:05

These are all great!!

Being an independant woman is pretty high up for me

Also, like persephonesnake, knowing that how my DS is is down to me

Knowing my DS can sometimes do girly things/try on my makeup/have purple as his favourite colour without being made to be doing somehing wrong or giry, no comments like 'be a man' or 'that's for girls' or 'don't be a sissy' etc. that exP would have said

Being on MN when I should be getting DS ready for school and me ready for work! Better go now!

Look forward to reading others' comments after work

OP posts:
Report
beller · 29/10/2007 09:07

Thanks..love reading this post as im 32 weeks pregnant and my lovely exp has done a runner!
x

Report
LuckyUnderpants · 29/10/2007 11:09

best thing for me is knowing my DS1 (who is now 18) has turned into a kind, sensitive, confident, loyal and honest young man and it was all down to me
Even his father admited (over the mic to all who was there) at his 18 b'day party that he had no part and i take all the credit
plus i secnd everything thats been said already about being independant, less washing, not having to answer to anyone etc etc....and being able to share my big bed with DS2 (15 mths) is the best thing on cold winter nights

Great thread btw

Report
colditz · 29/10/2007 11:22

Once the kids are in bed, I don't have to speak to anyone if I don't want to.

I can roll myself in the duvet like a sausage roll and keep books next to my head.

I can keep my favorite clothes in my bedside table - because it's my bedside table.

I can switch the television off - xp lived and died for the bloody idiot box.

Report
OverMyDeadBody · 29/10/2007 14:59

'I can roll myself in the duvet like a sausage roll and keep books next to my head'.

I do that too, it's fab!

I can leave stuff lying around in my room and know it will be exactly where I left it and no one has moved it.

I never find empty milk bottles/juice cartons/jars and pots in the fridge where someone has put them back empty (ex used to do this)...although I suppose DS will probably do this as a teenager

OP posts:
Report
Pinkchampagne · 29/10/2007 16:29

I can watch what I want on the TV

I can come on MN whenever I want, without worrying about H getting angry & assuming I'm having an online affair!

I tidy my house when I want to, not because he will soon be home & go mad if it is a mess.

I get some me time when he has the boys.

I am enjoying dating again!

Report

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

macdoodle · 29/10/2007 16:35

LOOOOOve this thread...all the above ++
eat what and when I want without being looked at like I just crawled out from under a rock
having a night to myself when H has DD sleep over his flat
[grin

Report
OverMyDeadBody · 29/10/2007 18:03

Oooh yes, dating!

OP posts:
Report
OverMyDeadBody · 29/10/2007 18:04

...and flirting too! That is fun

OP posts:
Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.