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Have you ever just given up on relationships?

9 replies

FrightOwl · 07/10/2007 21:31

...and if so why?

OP posts:
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caroline3 · 07/10/2007 21:38

This one struck a cord with me tonight....

Yes, I have given up on men certainly for time being.

I have had a couple of unsuccessful relationships following marriage break-up and have been celibate for 3 years now!! I guess I have just got sick of having to look at internet dating sites or pester friends to introduce me to people. The whole process is pretty soul destroying and seems very undignified at my age (early 40s). My kids give me all the love and cuddles I need at the moment, but there are times when I think I don't want to be on my own forever and need to start trying again. Then I think about how fat and unattractive I have become and the whole things fills me with dread. Also going out on dates costs money which I am fairly short of.

What about you??

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TrickORTripletEm · 07/10/2007 21:38

Sorry, I'm one of the really sad ones who always hangs in there until the very last minute, I don't think I have ever finished a relationship.When I was younger I just used the avoidance method!!

However, now I have kids I would definately think twice if I thought my relationship was coming to an end. It's one thing to make yourself miserable, but I don't think I could bare to see my kids miserable.

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TrickORTripletEm · 07/10/2007 21:40

Sorry frightOwl,misread that!! Thought it said have you ever just given up on a relationship!!

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prettyfly1 · 08/10/2007 08:42

yep - for four, nearly five years. bad experiences and a need to just learn to be me combined with a strong wish for total independance, financially and emotionally led me to the choice. I miss having a laugh but love is something i jsut cant be dealing with and am happy as i am.

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sportie · 08/10/2007 12:21

my marraige was so awful its taken me over 10 years to trust a guy enough to allow him into our life.Actually wasn't a problem being solo as DDs were only babies and all my energy was spent bringing them up and studying/working etc. Have just started a relationship about 4 mths ago....really wierd to start again but actually enjoying the attention and the sex!!!

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allgonebellyup · 08/10/2007 16:28

yes i have totally given up for good now, my dh is now with another woman and i am so gutted that i NEVER want to go through this pain ever again.we were only together 5yrs but i did finish it cos i was sick of bickering.

my first relationship ended after 4yrs, but strangely i wasnt fussed when it ended, despite having dd.

i dont want to look at another man as long as i live, although i do miss having someone around and sex/affection.

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zmandaz · 08/10/2007 18:41

I wish I could give up on men! The only guy I'm really into at the moment is only interested in being friends and I'm terrified of making a mistake again like I did with my ex-h. Much as I'd love to think that I'd meet someone and settle down I don't want to get hurt again. But I really really don't want to be alone for the rest of my life so I guess I'm still hoping that my knight in shining armour will come along.

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lemonstartree · 03/11/2007 16:52

yes never ever again. Bad enough being urt myself but now I have dc... no way coudl Itrust myself to choose a partner who would be good to/for them when their own father has been such a prick.

42 and celibate forever

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prettyfly1 · 03/11/2007 17:33

after what i said a few weeks ago i may have to conceed defeat. i had given up on men but have since started to get involved with someone. we were apart for years, although i never forgot him and it seems to have just clicked. its still early doors and we hava long way to go but right now its lovely and i am glad i am giving him a chance.

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