Difficulties with ex-H over child maintenance

[mocca]

Hello lone parents! I'd welcome opinions on this please. Am divorcing husband and have a 7 year old D. We have always been financially independent of eachother and I always supported the family totally whilst we were together and worked full-time. He was a stay-at-home dad, made no effort to bring in any money at all and gave me nothing.

I'm still working full-time now that he's left but he helps a lot with childcare. I need to reduce my hours as the stress of F-T work is too much for me (I've just turned 50!). Probably this will mean I'm on a salary of around £10k. He currently pays no child maintenance at all but I've just asked him for a contribution of £100 per month from when I go P-T. He pays no tax as he doesn't declare any income but as he rents out rooms in a valuable property and works cash-in-hand as a painter/decorator, brings in around £1,300 per month. He could earn more if he wanted to but chooses to do only a couple of jobs a month at most because he finds it boring.

He's arguing that he shouldn't have to give this to me as he already spends money on D when he has her - but this is solely on treats and non-essentials (no clothes, food etc). He was very vitriolic when I asked him for this money and started assassinating my character - it was very hurtful as I tried to just be polite but this doesn't surprise me as he's always been very defensive about money and never had a proper job in his life (through choice). Do you think I'm being greedy asking for this? I'm struggling to keep head above water but have always worked hard and will carry on doing so. And I want what's best for D. Thanks

[imagineafullnightsleep]

You are absolutely not being unreasonable. You make sure you carry on with this. £100 is not excessive - to put in in perspective, you are asking for 8% of his take home salary - which is very little. Not that I'd normally recommend threatening anyone - but perhaps a small mention to him, of either he starts being amicable and giving you what you need, or you will contact the inland revenue and have a chat about his 'cash in hand' employment situation !