This week im bitter because....
I go to work and buy everything for ds, fund his hobbies, go out of my way to do things to make him happy while daddy sits on his ass all day with his gf and her kid. (ok so a bit of history, he lost his job due to attitude (seen it all before) but apparently has a condition which makes it impossible for him to work at the moment , benefit of the doubt though as he's always worked).
when ds started staying at his dad's house, his stuff bit by bit started going missing, so i bought him new clothes, which are now going missing. he's coming back dressed like a tramp in faded old clothes, several sizes too small (her child's clothes)(bet ds's new clothes will fit her kid lovely soon). dad hasnt bought him a birthday present, or even a birthday card, wouldn't attend his party (yet again, despite the fact i invited her and her child too). dad is also now refusing to take him to his hobbies while ds is staying with him (which i still have to pay for btw) because hes "going out" (exp that is, he's not taking ds with him, ds will be in the house with exp's gf and her child).
so why even have ds stay there? im beginning to wonder if he's just being used as a distraction to keep her kid busy .
honestly why do i bother? months ago i was selling most of my clothes on ebay to get funds together to make sure ds had a decent birthday as i was severely in it at the time (through no fault of my own i hasten to add), and this twit, who pays me not a penny maintenance, wastes my money, and despite the fact, he's had months to cobble some money together for ds's birthday, he still hasnt...and ds comes home telling me that they bought her kid a psp for his birthday etc etc, and that they go away for weekends to the seaside, and they are decorating.
i realise that actually sounds like jealousy and its not, they more or less have the same things we do, and he has always worked in the past even if he's been a fool with his money. this is perhaps my point. i realise he may not have much money at the moment and ive been in that situation too so i do understand. however, having to claim benefit to me is not a valid excuse, because i always managed to buy everything ds needed when i had to claim..so i dont think a birthday present is an unreasonable request. im not unreasonable, i cancelled the claim through the csa as soon as he lost his job to make life easier for him (wasnt a "malicious" claim anyway, we had both agreed to the pittance he paid me when he was earning a decent wage).
it his lack of thought...and well now i just think he's taking the piss tbh. he's paid me nothing since christmas, doesnt help me with uniform and cant even be arsed to get a present for ds. he's always been like this when he's working too. although im now earning more than i was i'm far from loaded!
i actually wish he'd sod off again. i really feel like he's just using ds as a playmate for his gf's child because as the last 8 years, he has no interest in him whatsoever and this seems to continue, despite his sudden erm..."eagerness?" to have his child stay with him. i guess it goes a lot deeper than the money issue, im probably scared ds is being used, as his dad's attitude generally seems to indicate that and i can see it all ending in tears.
ok...am i just been taken for a fool here?
more than that...ds hasn't said anything the sweet gentle boy that he is but it must hurt to see this other child being favoured.
thanks, btw, if you read that far...its a bit of a ramble again!
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.
Lone parents
You know, i liked it better when he had no interest in ds, every week without fail i would like to shake him
7 replies
nightowl · 28/08/2007 19:14
OP posts:
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.