Separation or divorce? Sorry bit long!

[Daisyinbloom]

Hi needing some advice here from you wonderful people! My situation is DH left Feb last year with au-pair (long story), and now 2007 has dawned and I want my life back! We are selling the family home as can't afford to keep it with him not here. To be fair to him he can't pay what he hasn't got. He pays nothing towards 2 DS but has them for half the week (okay with me). We have negative equity in the house, but have to sell due to huge mortgage. I want to finish with him permanently.. BUT - do i divorce or get separation agreement? We will both come out of this with borrowings because of the house, so i want to keep costs down. Has anyone any experience of either, and how much did it cost?
The other point is that I desparately want to now be in control, after a year of living in limbo (waiting for him to come back as he promised, etc etc, then realising that he wasn't coming back and actually I didn't want him back anyway). What information do I need to get before I see a solicitor? Eg pension claims etc. I really really need to keep the costs down here as I am broke! But this fear of "what i need to organise" is stopping me going to get help right now! Can anyone help please?

[Kelly1978]

it really sounds as if you need proper legal advice. Are you not entitled to lefal aid?

[Kelly1978]

legal

[lulumama]

might get more assistance posting in legal/money matters too, or doing a link to this thread there x

[Daisyinbloom]

hi thanks for your replies. Don't think I get legal aid as I have a good salary - though all of that is swallowed up in mortgage! Will try posting as well in legal / money matters. Thanks again!

[MamaG]

You might get Legal Aid - it goes on outgoings as well as income, so if you ARE paying loads for a mortgage, you may be lucky.

See a solicitor who does a free 1/2 hour interview.

Get a divorce - its over, you know its over and you'll only drag it out by not doing it now.

Good luck