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Advice needed please

5 replies

Foxy800 · 09/07/2014 22:56

Hi I have been separated from my dds dad for three years now and contact has always been sporadic and currently it is a month since he last saw her. He is also behind with maintence which is a ridulously low amount so on advice of a solicitor I saw last week I have applied to the csa. However, I was going to use the solicitor to write a letter to ex explaining that dd needs regular contact and to arrange some but the fees are way out of my price range so not going to go down this route anymore. Any suggestions on how to go about it. I cant just talk to him as all I get it when tried to discuss it in the past is I cant commit due to work.

Thanks in advance.

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PajamaQueen · 10/07/2014 09:23

If you can't talk, is there any way you could email him and ask him to arrange something? Surely he knows his work schedule and can at least spare an hour somewhere. It's up to him weather he takes up the offer of arranging to see his DD but at least if you email rather than talk to him about it there will be a record of you trying to sort something out - along with his reply.

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cestlavielife · 10/07/2014 10:44

you can make him have contact.
it needs to come from him.
email him offering dates so you can show that to dd in the future.
pointless trying to force him to make better + more contact.

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Meglet · 10/07/2014 10:55

You can't force him to have contact, and from the sound of him it might be a waste of time. He knows he should see her so leave the ball in his court. Do you have copies of e-mails to back it up?

FWIW the dc's stopped seeing their dad 5yrs ago and he's always paid maintenance via the CSA on time.

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Foxy800 · 10/07/2014 18:29

I don't have emails but do have all texts etc recorded in a book. I am also currently going through csa which he found out today when he got a letter from them, he called to moan at me that I hadnt talked to him about it.

Thanks for replies.x

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Foxy800 · 12/07/2014 11:29

I am thinking of writing him a letter stating that dd really needs regular contact and making a suggestion then leaving it in his court so to speak. If i do I will keep a copy of letter to show her when older if necessary.

No idea if it will work but want her to at least know I tried for her.