Been single now for almost 5 years - anyone have any advice re getting 'out there'?... Feeling a little lonely now tbh...

(8 Posts)
PiperBeeley Tue 17-Jun-14 13:43:31

The thought terrifies me quite frankly! - my last relationship was violent and abusive, and it's taken me a long time getting over it, but in fear of sounding a little cliche - all my friends are encouraging me to be brave and try again! Also I have 4 children aged 4 - 14. I think part of the reason I've stayed single is because I really don't believe any man would consider dating me with such a large family, which makes me feel a little hopeless, but I genuinely understand it! Should I try, or accept it may never happen? PB x

OptimisticOlive Tue 17-Jun-14 17:02:14

Hey Piper, I haven't got much advice to give I'm afraid (I'm single lol) but can say I have done a bit of online dating and it is great if you're just starting to get out there again, boosts confidence, meet new people etc. And you have already got past the how many kids etc stage when you meet so you don't need to worry about that. There are some lovely guys online (also lots of weirdos, you just need to be careful and do all the recommended steps for safe dating, don't let them pick you up at home/give them your address until you've had a few dates, don't get pissed and do things you'll regret, meet in public place, if your instincts say someone is dodgy trust your instincts!) I've had 18 dates from online in 2 years, sounds awful but I'm picky! And all of them bar one have been lovely and not weirdos.

But do take it with a pinch of salt and don't expect to meet the "one" (bonus if you do meet the one though smile

Good luck and keep us posted about how it goes!

Minime85 Tue 17-Jun-14 17:59:17

Hi. Get on pof or similar and have some fun flirtatious conversations to start with and go from there.

PiperBeeley Tue 17-Jun-14 21:25:57

Thanks guys smile problem is the last guy I was (the violent psycho) is also single, and he is also on these sites sad I'd love to try these things but honestly the thought of 'bumping' into him frightens the life out of me! I do sometimes consider having a look anyway, but I invariably chicken out. I think meeting someone new is going to be trickier than I thought confused

OptimisticOlive Fri 20-Jun-14 18:25:30

You could always set up a profile with no picture then he wouldn't know it was you even if you did run into him?

Ollybob Sat 21-Jun-14 20:22:18

Olive has a good idea but it doesn't attract many people. What you could do though is sign up with no photo, have a good search around and then bloke your ex's profile, once that's done you can pop a photo or 2 up and then not worry about him seeing it smile
Every site is different so worth looking at the filters and contact options as you may be able to prevent him by seeing you just by tweaking those smile

Ollybob Sat 21-Jun-14 20:22:50

Block his profile, not bloke lol

PiperBeeley Tue 24-Jun-14 18:21:22

Ah thankyou Olive and Olly! I didn't know you could block people - never occured to me to try! I think I may give it a try then grin
Thankyou for the advice! smile

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