is there anybody who finds being lone parent difficult?

[shebnem]

i am a lone parent. after a bitter break up with my dd's father i am left alone to look after everything. in other threads i saw 'why some women content doing all house work?'
i am doing everything myself like any lone parent. but the difference is i have nobody around to look after my dd for a couple of hrs. i have to face every pressure myself. but i find it so hard sometimes.
we broke up with her father cos of domestic violence. then he put me in such a situation that i have to blame myself for everything and he never tried to contact her. anyway him and his family and his friends played their game very well.
somedays are so difficult. my dd is not a so content child. she is demanding and after my attention 24/7.
that makes life so difficult.
and cos we had difficult times i couldnt concentrate on her dicipline very well and sometimes she really gives me hard time.
i feel under her pressure to much too. i have to entertain her, etc. it is very hard for me to go out with her, or to do something of home or of my own during her presence. thats so difficult.
i gave up having fun long time ago.
all i wish is to recover and to be my old self-dressing nice, go to work- but i dont know when will i be able to do that.
just tried to take out these from my chest.

[Uwila]

I have no experience, but support will surely be along soon...

[Uwila]

Bumping for you....

[tortoise]

Hi shebnem.
Im a lone parent and it is hard when you have to do everything but im lucky because i do get sometime child free when they see their dads(daytime only). My xp was violent but it was towards my son.Cant remember the last time i went out and i too hope one days things will be better.How old is you dd? Its never too late to start disapline.Ive got 2 of mine sleeping in their own beds all nite since xp left so it can be done.
Do you have any friends or family near by?

[shebnem]

hi tortoise,
my dd is 5 yrs old.
there is no support from her father. he got rid of her in his own ways.
my family is away and i have friends but i cant dare to leave her to them, cos i dont trust her behaviours.
so its really hard.
thanks for sharing my problem.

[tortoise]

My family are away too.They moved to Turkey in october last year.My boys see their dad quite often and the girls see theres 3 times a week for 3 hours at a time.
Until recently ive never left the girls with anyone else but i had to let them go to a child minder so i could do a parenting course once a week.They are used to dealing with all sorts of children.Does she start school in sept then? Maybe you could start a course/new hobby once she starts? Sometime just for you doing something you enjoy.Have you looked to see if there are any mn meet ups in your area?

[shebnem]

yes, there are many courses, etc, i know tortoise.
i have no problem to find them or to find new friends.
my problem is, till now i was the sole carer of her, i never had the chance to leave her for 1 night to anyone.
my dd is in fact a lovely girl and i love her very much, but i feel sometimes i need some space to breathe and to miss her.

[shebnem]

yes, there are many courses, etc, i know tortoise.
i have no problem to find them or to find new friends.
my problem is, till now i was the sole carer of her, i never had the chance to leave her for 1 night to anyone.
my dd is in fact a lovely girl and i love her very much, but i feel sometimes i need some space to breathe and to miss her.

[crazychilledmummy]

I know exactly what you mean. I am sole carer for my DS and I have no family to give me a break. I have lots of lovely friends but they all work and have their own lives.

If she is 5 does she go to school yet? Do you get any time away from her at all?

You will get a lot of support here, keep posting...