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what can my nasty ex do without parental responsibility?

5 replies

honey86 · 16/05/2013 19:23

i split with my controlling ex last week. i ended it because i was sick of the mind games and verbal abuse. hes threatening court but being as he wont have pr, what can he do legal-action-wise once this baby is born? at present hes still spreading hate about me and my family over the internet.

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bluebell8782 · 16/05/2013 20:22

Why won't he have PR? Father's get it automatically these days unless you aren't planning on putting him on the birth certificate which is unfair on the child.
He will be able to get PR through the court anyway unless he's a danger to the child.
Sorry he's being an arse to you but I think you ought to be prepared for him getting reasonable access if he's serious about going all the way.

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NumTumDeDum · 16/05/2013 20:28

He can't make any applications until the baby is born. Once born he can apply for parental responsibility and contact. If you include him on the birth certificate then he will have parental responsibility. If you don't then you can later agree to enter into a parental responsibility agreement with him or a court can make an order on application.

PR does not guarantee contact and so if that was your only reason for witholding it, then it would be a waste of time. Having PR or not habing PR makes very little difference if he makes an application for contact.

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Lioninthesun · 16/05/2013 21:31

If he wants to be on the BC he has to attend the registration. My ex couldn't be bothered to come, despite me telling him time and date weeks in advance, and he tried to tell the Court that I had not put him on it deliberately by going behind his back to register. Luckily I had an email to confirm he knew the time and date and simply didn't turn up.

Ex took me to court as he decided he didn't want to pay the CSA, or any CM at all. He tried to say that not being on the BC showed he wasn't to have parental responsibility Judge disagreed and ordered him to pay and suggested he see his DD. He has yet to do that though...

My advice is to leave him off it - you can put him on later if you and he like - and contact CSA as soon as baby is born (they don't back date payments and can only start claiming £ from your first contact with them).

Try to rise above the gossip - he is making himself look idiotic slagging of the mother of his child.

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Sunshinewithshowers · 16/05/2013 22:48

Yes, the father has to be present to register the birth, & to be put on the certificate.

My partner of 9 years left me when I was 6 months pregnant for OW

I had to register baby's birth on my own 3 weeks ago, so only my name on certificate.

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honey86 · 17/05/2013 10:26

i thought about it because he is an angry abusive bully plays mind games. every request of his is unreasonable but if i dont fulfill it he gets nasty. hes very controlling and has mental health issues. hes not allowed contact with his first child for the same reason. he also reckons he has to right with pr to snatch his child and run away abroad and i wudnt be able to stop him.

i decided a life without a role model like that is better for the baby, and my 3 other children, as his behaviour would be harmful to their emotional well being. i think a life of living in an unstable environment and mental/verbal abuse is whats more unfair.