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Living overseas

Two days in India to decide whether my family can live there - help!

20 replies

HumpheadWrasse · 02/09/2014 20:55

DH has been offered a role in Hyderabad that he's really excited about. He and I are flying out at the end of next week for him to meet his new boss and for us to have a look around before confirming he'll take the job.

We can only manage 2 full days there, with work and childcare commitments. It's our first international assignment - is there anyone who's been out on a visit like this before to a new country who can give me any tips on what I should be looking at/ questions I should be asking? We will have a 'relocation agent' apparently, I'm not too sure what they do. I've not been to this part of India before and DH has never been to Asia at all.

We have 2 DC so schools etc will be a priority.
Thanks!

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HerRoyalNotness · 02/09/2014 21:01

Our company has never given us a reccie trip, so you're lucky there!

As soon as we land somewhere new we drive around the city getting a feel for the neighbourhoods to see where we will live (your relocation agent will probably direct you to the expat areas anyway), see which are most convenient for schools, work and shopping/activities.

Before you go, check out the international schools available and locations to give you an idea of areas to live in. How will they be getting there? School bus, or will you have a driver? (our company forbids employees to drive in India and provides drivers) Check the availability of school places before your trip.

Check out where the local food markets are, and the western style supermarkets. Ask about cellphones, internet and sat TV. Find out if there is a country club/british club in the city, and the location.

Can't think of anything else off the top of my head. Good luck!

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HerRoyalNotness · 02/09/2014 21:03

Oh yes, location of hospitals, gps and dentists - you need a good feel for what healthcare and the quality that is available for you.

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HumpheadWrasse · 02/09/2014 21:40

Thanks HerRoyal, god I'd not even thought about how the kids will be getting to school! DH would get a car but presumably he'd need that for commuting. I've had a look at the websites of the three international schools I can find in the city, it's very difficult to see through the sales pitch. I guess the neighbourhoods around each of them would be a good place to start.

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HumpheadWrasse · 02/09/2014 21:42

You're very brave by the way, to take the plunge and move without looking around first. I now feel luckier!

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butterfliesinmytummy · 03/09/2014 00:54

I've had one recce trip in 10 moves and never had a relocation consultant, make the most of it all! I would say do your homework before you go, work out what you like the look of, what you don't, where the expats live, where yr dh's office is, where the schools are etc. Look on forums, travel guides, blogs etc. get as much info as possible. Your time is relatively short, can you start emailing the relocation consultant before you go?

Sounds like an amazing opportunity.

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cheeseandpineapple · 03/09/2014 21:32

Exciting! I've lived away for nearly 20 years and sometimes a reccie can be double edged. I've loved living in each of the different countries we've been in (in Europe and Asia) but I probably didn't like them or envisage liking them when I first visited. In fact, fortunately, we were already committed by the time we did our reccie for current place because I'm pretty sure I'd have said no and backed out but 7 years later, we're keen to stay if we can.

Main drivers for us post children have been schools, would prioritise seeing them, check availability of places ie you can get your children in for when you plan to move and ensure fees are covered by the company or affordable.

Have heard same about drivers being provided for India based roles, that's important as driving in India can be hair raising!

If you go ahead, make sure the company provide you with decent temporary accommodation for as long as possible (at least 3 months) so you can get lay of the land before committing to a place to live. Would try and see a couple of the temp options whilst you're over so if you go ahead you know which one you'd prefer. No point seeing perm accommodation options in such a short time and before you know which schools you're going for as it's usually the schools which determine the location of your perm accommodation.

Your relocation agent should organise for you to visit the schools you might be interested in but do your own research and make sure they include the schools you're weighing up. In some places, agents get incentives for taking you to see certain schools. I've had a relocation agent refuse to set up a visit for a school which was recommended to me, claiming they never have places, I organised my own visit and that was the school we ended up at.

We opted for a British style primary school although older one is now at an international secondary (IB one). How old are your children and do you have a sense of the type of schooling you would want for them? How long do you think you will be overseas? That's usually a factor in choosing type of school in terms of transitioning back potentially.

Could your husband's company put you in touch with someone from the company or a spouse with same aged children so you can speak to someone before the reccie for school recommendations and general overview? Maybe you could squeeze meeting them for coffee/drink/dinner when you're over?

Overall with only 2 days, I think it's schools which are the priority. Won't leave much time for anything else except hopefully feasting on amazing Indian food!

All the best and keep an open mind. Very hard to gauge a place in a few days. Plus India in particular is going to be a big contrast but it could be an amazing experience for you and your family!

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cheeseandpineapple · 03/09/2014 21:45

Would add, check that your housing budget is sufficient for family sized homes in and around the schools you're considering and whilst not much time to look at permanent accom options, might be worth squeezing in a visit to at least one property to get a sense of what you could get for your budget. If it looks like the budget is low and you're not likely to get something which you think is suitable, there's still scope to negotiate.

I don't know what the set up is in Hydrabad but when we lived in different countries in Asia, we lived in apartments/houses with shared pool, gym, communal garden which were great fun and very sociable. Might be worth finding out if there are places like that potentially.

Also worth making sure the company offers club membership for the whole family. In Asia, handy to have eg for swimming if you don't have access to a pool where you live and just generally good for socialising.

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Laptopwieldingharpy · 04/09/2014 01:19

what cheeseandpineapple said!
your relocation agent must really work all his agenda around school appointments.
good luck!

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marcopront · 05/09/2014 18:18

If you only have two days, a lot of that may be spent just dealing with the noisy, dirty place that India is. I am just starting my fifth year in Mumbai and love it here, and had been here to visit many times before. Every year I watch colleagues deal with being here, it is tough.

Monsoon is happening at the moment. This week it has rained every day and this means there is flooding, so travel takes longer. Be prepared for that if you are coming next week.

I agree with the advice about visiting schools. You need to decide if you want to live near school, so your children's commute is short or near your husband's work, so his commute is short.

Normally expat jobs come with a car and driver, but often a group will travel to work in one car and leave the others for the spouse and children.

I found this group on Facebook
www.facebook.com/HyderabadExpats
but it doesn't look very active. This compares with the half a dozen similar groups for Mumabi with about 20 posts a day. I am not aware of a big expat community in Hydrabad and the "international" may be that in name only. I am a teacher and my school has about 5% expat students. I have been on workshops here and cannot remember meeting any expats working in Hydrabad.

Try this Facebook group
www.facebook.com/groups/www.expatsinindia.org/

it does seem to have a Delhi bias, and many of the expats are of Indian origin.

(I'll post more after putting my daughter to bed)

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marcopront · 05/09/2014 18:59

I wrote a further message on the laptop but the Internet died, which is a common occurrence here. I'll try again tomorrow.

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HumpheadWrasse · 05/09/2014 19:21

Wow, thanks so much everyone for taking time to give such good advice. It's all a lot to take in at the moment! I've been having a look at some areas and schools, and some rental property websites, so I'm a bit more prepared before we go. It looks like one of the international schools is in an area very close to DH's work, and another is a bit further away but in an area where there seem to be several gated-community type developments, I think both schools/areas would be worth a look.
The DC are quite young, 5 and 6. DH has spoken to his (potential) new boss who has DC out there, he has said schools are ok but as marcopront says not really 'international' or same standard as in the UK. Hopefully with me not working I'd be able to help fill in any gaps.

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marcopront · 06/09/2014 05:09

Internet is back.

I should have said in five teaching jobs overseas I have only once been flown over for an interview/visit. That is the only school I have left after a year, so seeing it didn't help.

You will need to be very clear with the agent what you want to see, and if he suggests other things, be firm.

Getting a cellphone legally will be a problem, you need proof of where you live and they do home visits to check the address now. They didn't tell my friend when her home visit would be and then cut her off because she wasn't in when they visited.

You will need to register with the FRRO, if you do move here. I will save the horror stories about that for later.

Feel free to ask me more questions. There is another thread here from someone who might be moving to Mumbai with toddlers. There might be three MNers in India soon.

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Lifestooshorttosleep · 06/09/2014 17:42

I'd call the schools ahead and see if they can recommend any housing areas as in some places the expats tend to live in the same vicinity. That might help you narrow done what communities to look at, as two days is not s huge amount of time so you'll need to focus. In my experience, school admissions depts are pretty helpfu.

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marcopront · 08/09/2014 14:44

Having mentioned monsoon, it seems to have slowed down here, and it has been hot. No idea about Hydrabad though.

I am not sure there will be a big enough expat community to have expat enclaves. It might be the schools i have worked in, but I can't imagine the admissions departments giving advice about where to live.

While I totally agree with the comment about not being really international, I wouldn't be so sure of standards being lower. Different certainly, my school is an IB school and my DD is in a class of 13 in year 4 with two class teachers and specialist teachers for Music, Art, Drama, Yoga, Library, IT, PE and Hindi. She has developed incredibly good thinking skills and knows how things work. Her reading might be slightly behind her peers in England but I think she is ahead of them in many ways.

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vdpmum · 11/09/2014 09:51

Can I ask what your thoughts were? We are moving to Mumbai with 3 DCs and I am going on a recce trip alone at the end of the month.

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HumpheadWrasse · 26/09/2014 11:34

Hello, well after a hectic couple of weeks I wanted to say thanks again everyone for your advice ... we've decided to go for it and DH has accepted the job in Hyderabad. He moves in November and I'll be moving out with the DC at Christmas - I'm currently excited but terrified!

With just a couple of days to look around we found it exciting but hugely chaotic and disorientating, so full of people and traffic, Hyderabad seems to be growing very quickly with almost more building sites than finished buildings. We weren't hugely impressed by the relocation agent who seemed to have a 'list' to show us which wasn't flexible - for example there was only one school they wanted to show us which I wasn't that happy with when we looked round. Thankfully one of DH's new colleagues tipped him off about another school, an American one near his office, which we went to look at without the agent. But we did get a good sense of the city and the areas to look at, so now we can do more research on our own.

Vdpmum, good luck with your recce trip, hope it goes well for you too!

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Seriouslyffs · 26/09/2014 11:42

When we lived in China, we lived where we did because there was an advert for the compound in the lift at DHs work. Hmm
It was only a very short term post but it worked out well- we established what schools laid on transport for that compound and then called them for places.
Slightly similarly on another posting we sat down with friends who had lived in the same big city and were now back here and worked out where they'd lived, whether DH's commute was doable from there, sorted out school places (same school!) and ended up making friends with their friends!!

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Seriouslyffs · 26/09/2014 11:43

xpost! Sounds like the personal contact approach is working for you too.
Grin

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marcopront · 26/09/2014 12:29

India is generally chaotic and disorientating. It is however an amazing place to live. Most people are very helpful and friendly. Did you decide on a school?

Best of luck for the move. Feel free to ask me any more questions.

Send me a message if you are going to be in Mumbai, maybe we can meet up.

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butterfliesinmytummy · 26/09/2014 21:16

Congratulations on your decision. I adore India but have only visited, it will be a culture shock for you all I'm sure but what an amazing adventure.

Something about most expats ... We genuinely like sharing information and tips, don't be afraid to ask your contact or anyone else questions. Your turn will come to return the favour once you're an old hand. Good luck!

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