Long term, regular Mumsnetter - NC for this - Oh I can think of a hundred threads - I know all about Extended, Dizzy and beesimo.
My son came out to me yesterday. He is 11. I'm struggling with it to be honest, which has shocked me - I have gay friends and have even campaigned for gay rights in the past.
DS is a very immature 11 year old and he told me that he was gay after a friend of his older sister (16) told us that he had a boyfriend.
As soon as he told us (me and my DD) I immediately hugged him and told him that it was fine, that it is normal and OK and that I love him (all true obviously!) and he cried and I reassured him.
Everything was OK until I went to bed and was completely unable to sleep and worried and worried and became so anxious about it all that I was sick at 4am.
Please believe me that I am not homophobic, but I am so so worried about my son - how will he cope with all the hatred he will encounter? It makes my heart hurt. I managed to keep everything ticking over all day as usual (I think but maybe I was a bit in my own head, I don't know)
He's been grumpy all day. I broached the subject with him again this evening, and was trying to make him feel better by telling him that 10 percent of the population are gay and that out of his year at school of 300, statistically 30 of those children will be homosexual too, and he started crying again. This is all so hard.
Anyway, he then said that gay men don't have sex and I was a bit and said that of course they do, and he asked me how and I said that they have sex like straight couples - kissing each other and oral sex but that sometimes they...and then he interrupted and asked what I meant by oral and so I told him. God. And then he asked how that worked with gay men and I told him and he said "I didn't think gay people had sex"
And he followed that up with a bit of stuff of about not wanting to do that - and so I was just thinking that's a normal reaction to the thought of oral sex (straight or gay So I asked him if he fancied any of the boys in school and he laughed at me and said "NO WAY" So I asked if he fancied any famous men and he said Johnny Depp and then I said "Oh! good taste!" and he said "I wouldn't want to kiss him though or do that other thing, I just think he's really cool"
Good Lord this is long, so in reality he probably is gay - because why would he say it if he weren't right? but he also told me that he really fancied my DD's friend (a girl) and I think he's just a bit confused right now.
I wouldn't say that if he were straight though would I?
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LGBT children
We are all confused
6 replies
iThinkiKnow · 17/03/2012 23:27
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