Looking for some advice regarding ex and contact

[Sienna2012]

Just looking for some advice, not necessarily legal but if anyone knows that side of things, their input would be great too!

My son is 8 months, ex and I split up when I was pregnant

With regards to contact currently ex has DS every weds for the afternoon and one day every weekend. He is changing jobs and tells me wont be able to do the midweek contact, therefore wants more contact at weekends. He says if I don't agree both days every weekend he threatens with court.

We have attended mediation to get where we are today and thought we was finally communicating reasonably well.

I have older school aged children from a previous relationship so although I do have DS all week if I plan to visit family, days out etc, always done with my children on a weekend. I therefore am reluctant to agree to both days every weekend...
Ex cant do overnights as has nowhere suitable to stay and the contact he is wanting would mean my children would only see their brother for a couple of hours every weekday evening. Never having a full day with all my children together except for school holidays.

I am stuck as to what to come up with for a solution? I think both days every other weekend would be ok if DS was older but at 8 months I think going a fortnight without seeing his Dad is too long... and ex wouldn't agree to this anyway.

Is there an obvious solution that I'm just not seeing? Or am I being selfish and not being fair on ex to not agree to both Sat + Sun each weekend?

[Collaborate]

I think you have valid concerns. How likely is it you'd want to go away at the weekend? Are there things you will actually do as a whole family? You are right to consider the baby's relationship with siblings. Father is wrong to threaten you with court if you don't bow to his demands.

[Collaborate]

He could have the baby for a couple of hours after work mid week.

[Sienna2012]

At the moment he has him for one day every weekend so haven't been away or anything yet but do have a family day out every weekend, even if its just visiting cousins/grandparents as very close to my parents, and always do this on the day I have all of my children. So therefore reluctant to agree both days every weekend as baby would never be a part of this...
He says he will working too late and is going to be moving a bit further away therefore can't do a midweek contact whereas at the moment he has every weds afternoon.
I've suggested once all this change of work schedule happens and he has somewhere to live we do Fri night - Sat night one week and Sat night - Sun night the next until baby is old enough to go a fortnight without seeing him and then do the whole weekend every other weekend, seeing as he can't do midweek am hoping by then he'll agree as right now he is saying he is never going to agree to going a fortnight without seeing him

[SilentSinger]

The norm tends to be a whole weekend every other weekend. If you worked or you son was at school (which will happen at some point), if your ex had him every weekend then you would never have quality weekend time with him.

It's important for children to have relationships with both sides of their family but the arrangement your ex want would be at the expense of your family. If you can't agree between you, then he would have to go to court to formalise the situation and I'm not convinced that he would be successful)

(NB I have no legal qualifications)