Ex has stopped paying the mortgage

[gems77]

Me and my soon to be ex husband share a mortgage. We split 18 months ago and instead of maintainance we decided that he would pay his half of the mortgage instead.
He lives with his new gf in a big 4 bed house around the corner and has now said because of change in his wage he can no longer afford his half of the mortgage. It was roughly £50 a week now he says he can pay £20 we have 3 children the oldest not being his.
Iv contacted csa.
Anyway Im out of work so get help with my half. We have interest only so I get all of that paid. My mortgage company have now said the interest only plan has come to an end and capital now has to be paid so thats an extra £50 a week.
He still refuses to pay so dwp are gonna pay almost all of his half of the interest also for me. Im still left with about 3275 a month to find. I dont have it unless I find a very well paid job. Im looking, but then I wont receive any help from the dwp so will have to find £620 on my own. He will be paying nothing but how does that work when the house has to sell when my youngest is 16? It isnt fair?
I cant have his name taken off as its too high for me to take on myself.
Has anybody been in the same position as me? Or know where I stand?

[gems77]

not 3275 its £275 a month but if i work its £620

[cestlavielife]

you need to consult a divorce lawyer and get divorced asap so the finances and the house can be sorted out

if the hosue was sold ho much euqity would there be? could you get a mortgage and buy elsewhere ?
would it be easier fo you to rent and get HB?
etcetc

[gems77]

We are in the process of our divorce.
I would like to keep the house as I will never be able to mortgage on my own.
It has as little as 5k in equity.
I wont always qualify for hb and would rather be paying my own mortgage than someone elses.
I just dont think its fair I pay. I struggle to juggle 3 kids, childcare, a home, after school activities and maintaining of the home for him to get a lump when my youngest is 16 and it has to be sold or i have to buy him out.

[cestlavielife]

you might agree he "gives" you the house now in lieu of any ongoing mantenance....

but if you residing in the hosue there is the concept of occupational rent.
but then i for his DC so complex.

why do you say 16 anyway?

ask for it to be "until the youngest finishes tertiary education" which give you til post-university.

in any case given the low equity at the moment it is academic isnt it? will all depend how much equity is there in however many years time...

[RedHelenB]

If there is that little equity then i would expect the court to award the house to you with the proviso you take him off the mortgage as soon as you reasonably can. However, you will need to be able to fund the mortgage in full yourself but he will need to pay appropriate child maintenance ( a minimum of 20% of his net wage)

[WkdSM]

I would get in touch with the mortgage company immediately and explain the circumstances to them.
They would then write to him and explain that he is jointly and severally liable for the debt whether he is resident at the property or not.
If the property was repossessed and a debt remained they could persue him for the entire sum - if he owns the property he and his girlfriend are living in they could take a charge against that house. They are more likely to persue someone in work with assets than a single mum in rented (worst case scenario - just to put the wind up him!!)

The mortgage company should also be able to write to him at his new address as well as you with regard to any changes in payments etc.

You should certainly see a lawyer and contact the CSA asap.

[Collaborate]

It's way more complicated than that. You need to speak to your solicitor (if you've got one) or get one (if you haven't).

CSA for the child maintenance. He'll pay 20% of his net pay, with deductions dependant upon how often the kids stay at his and how many kids in his current household. The court can order him to pay for his step child. All depends on his income how much he'll have to pay, but if the house will be reposessed without him paying more, you may well get it awarded.

[PatsysDouble]

How much does he take home a week or month?
He should be giving you 20% of that for the kids (assuming they sleep at yours each night) - how does that compare with what he was giving you before?
www.cmoptions.org/en/calculator/calculator.asp

[gems77]

My mortgage company wont take him off the mortgage as the amount we owe I would have to be on 35 k a year thats never going to be possible so he will be on the mortgage until, my youngest is 16, someone else moves in and there was one more cant remember. My solicitor explained whilst we were discussing the divorce.
Its just he has stopped paying since that and I rang my solicitor and she said I cant afford it I will have to sell.
Iv spoken to my mortgage company and they arnt too bothered as long as its paid. Dwp will pay the interest and his too.
He lives in her house.
He tells me he is bringing home £150 a week, even if this is true he cant afford to give me what I need I guess but if Im struggling and juggling to pay the capital, its not fair he walks away with whatever equity in years to come.
Thanks for all of your advice, appreciate it!

[cestlavielife]

it should be until youngest finishes full time education or becomes fully independent .
dont accept 16 as a cut off.

[RedHelenB]

If there is so little equity you may be as well to sell if you cant afford the mortgage as you won't be able to stay on interest free forever. On 600 odd a month it is very very unlikely that a court would order him to pay anything above child maintenance. Does he want to sell the house & how long until the youngest is 16?

[howmuchlonger]

Does he work part-time £150 a week isn't even minimum wage. Do you have proof that's all he earns?

[howmuchlonger]

If you work over 16 hours a week you'd get tax credits and some mortgage companies will take that into account as income. Would be unfair for you to struggle to pay the mortgage all those years and then for him to walk away with half.

[cestlavielife]

op might be able to argue any capital repayment is hers alone.
is moot point anyway as equity may not increase beyond 5000 .

[Happylander]

I am in this situation I have to find £920 a month. Ex not paying mortgage and can't get mortgage on my own and no equity. Anyway I am in process of getting house signed over to me but ex still having his name on the mortgage. This means that if I ever do sell it all proceeds go to me and he can't claim for something he has not paid for.

I got a lodger in as that means I can pay for mortgage. For you to take over the deeds I think you will need to show you can pay for it without help but not sure. How much does your ex get paid? If you know then you can use the CSA calculator to work out how much he has to give you.

[gems77]

There is little equity so selling wouldnt benefit me?
My youngest is 4.
All he says is thats what he earns and Im in a position where I get financial help with 3 kids and he doesnt get any help. Hence why he has stopped paying anything.
Equity might not increase an awful lot but it will increase.
Yes I asked him to do the same as you Happylander but he asked for 5k to do it. I dont have that sort of money but I said I would sell the car to give him 2k.
I just need to sort out with my mortgage company about paying interest just for a further year and then I can start paying capital when my youngest starts school and I can work.
The csa are dealing with my claim.
Im gonna wait to see what my mortgage company says and take it from there I would rather be paying my mortgage than someone elses and its about the same amount as rented property.
Your mortgage is very high Happylander. Its such a struggle on your own.

[Happylander]

Yes it is high but it is only for a 3 bed bungalow and less than most of my friends. Sussex is expensive lol.

Can you get a lodger? Move the kids into one room for a while? Students etc?

I don't have any spare money and very few treats but I am proud that I haven't had to lose my house.

[gems77]

Good for you! Thats how I feel.
I have worked hard over the years to make this house a home and of course the ex has too but now he has stopped. I want to keep our home and keep up with the maintainance of it.
Its a very small 3 bedroom house and my eldest is 16 in the smallest room and its very very small.
If there was space I would def consider this.

[RedHelenB]

If you can afford to keep it great but if it is at the expense of happiness, home is where the heart is not bricks & mortar. But from what you have written your ex is not going to contribute & you need to do the sums to see what's what. At least if you rent then HB covers all the housing costs. The other danger is that you still have financial links with ex & if he is bankrupted say, they can still come after any equity in the house.

[gems77]

Ok thanks for the advice Im gonna see how I get on with the mortgage company first and then make a decision

[RedHelenB]

GOOD LUCK with it all!