son's access to child

[pearshape]

My son has recently split with his partner. She is now preventing him from having any access to his ten month old son. My son loves his child and it is very hard for him to not have access, it is also not fair on the child. She has twice made arrangements for him to have access only to cancel them at the last minute. She now won't answer any messages or the phone. He hasn't seen his son since Christmas. He has been advised that he is entitled to regular access but how can this be enforced? He has just started a job but is on a low wage so won't be able to afford expensive legal fees. What can he do? Will he have any entitlement to legal aid? She is due to move, or may have already and he will have no idea where his son is living. I really want to help him but don't know how

[OldLadyKnowsNothing]

He needs to get a lawyer. If he's on a low wage he may well be entitled to Legal Aid; my son had to pay £42 (for everything) as his contribution.

Sadly, if she continues to be difficult, even a Court Order can't really be enforced. :(

Also contact/join Families Need Fathers (NB, NOT Fathers for Justice!), they can help with legal advice and so on.

[cantfindamnnickname]

Go onto the legal services commission website and i think there is an online calculator - then find out which local firms offer legal aid and ring them for an appointment asap.

Contact orders can be enforced.

He needs to take action NOW not sit back and do nothing - Christmas was 8 weeks ago

[pearshape]

Thank you so much for the advice. He really wants to get this sorted and is missing his son terribly. He has twice thought he'd arranged a day out with him only for her to let him down at the last minute. She seems to be using their baby as a weapon to hurt him which makes me very sad. We will have a look at the website. thank you again.

[Justw0nder1ng]

Also they will be expected to attend mediation in the first instance

[Collaborate]

I reinforce the fact that contact orders can be enforced.

[OldLadyKnowsNothing]

How can contact orders be enforced? I'm not doubting you, I just don't see how it can generally be in the best interests of the child to have the RP fined or jailed. Genuine question, my son's ex can be a difficult besom and frequently threatens that he'll never see his ds again (though she never follows through, tbf). He'd go for a contact order (she refuses mediation, I don't think she understands what it means) if it was going to mean something.

[prh47bridge]

The courts have a range of sanctions they can use to enforce contact orders. These include:

• making the mother compensate your son for any financial loss he suffers, for example travel costs for wasted journeys
  

• ordering the mother do community service
  

• order the mother to attend counselling, anger management sessions or whatever else the judge feels is appropriate
  

In extreme cases the courts can reverse residence so that, in your case, your son would become the RP.

[OldLadyKnowsNothing]

Thank you. :)

[rubin]

It is however quite rare that courts will sanction the mother (or person with residence) because they are reluctant to enforce additional financial hardship on a single parent & imposing a sanction (eg community service) that will involve the parent having to organise additional childcare which again has a financial impact.
What has happened in the past however is that, after many times of breaking an order, the judge has threatened that s/he will pass residency over to the NRP if the parent doesn't comply with the order.

[Collaborate]

All contact orders have a notice attached to warn the parent with residence that they must obey the order, and will be in contempt of court should they disobey. Having to undertake community service while a child is at school will not impact on the child, only the mother. The bigger picture is that it is in the long term interest of a child that contact takes place as per a court order. Short term difficulties that arise owing to a fine or the mother having to pay compensation (eg for the cost of a wasted holiday) are more than made up for by the long term benefit of proper contact. It is only rare that the courts use these powers because the threat of the sanctions being imposed are often sufficient to ensure compliance.

[rubin]

Appreciate what you're saying Collaborate, although from my knowledge on the basis of what I have seen happen through the courts where I live is that the court does very strongly take into consideration the impact on the parent with residence if sanctions are imposed. But as you say the threat is more often enough to ensure the order is complied with.

Don't get me wrong I don't support breaking any order, although every case needs to be judged individually & there can be circumstances where preventing contact, on a short term basis, is a necessary measure. EG Where the parent with residence is being unduly threatened & emotionally abused which in itself has a huge impact on the parent to raise the child. Unfortunately not all NRPs are open to discussion & reason.

[balia]

Agree with the advice to join Families Need Fathers. Get your son to organise mediation (if he is on a low wage he may not have to pay) and they will send out an invitation for his ex to attend.

He needs to get himself involved and active - for a very small child, 2 months is a very long time. What has he done to resolve the issue?