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Legal matters

Can my childrens dad take them on holiday abroad without my consent?

10 replies

akaemmafrost · 01/09/2011 00:32

That's it really. His family are ex pats in the middle east and he wants to take them there. Children are 8 and 4. We both have PR. Thanks.

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caramelwaffle · 01/09/2011 00:34

If he does not have a Court Order stopping him and he has their passports - yes.

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Graciescotland · 01/09/2011 00:47

I think, technically, he needs your permission to remove them from the country. A letter would suffice if anyone were to inquire. However, if you don't want them to go I think you'd need to be pro-active and contact passport people.

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Tyr · 01/09/2011 01:01

Unless there is a Residence order in his favour or a Shared residence order in force, he needs your permission.
Unless there are welfare concerns, a court will grant him permission to take them on holiday.
What part of the middle east and what are your concerns about it?

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akaemmafrost · 01/09/2011 05:52

No concerns about place really more about him and his family, they drink an incredible amount and have rather odd ideas about children coming second to that. There have been various incidents that make me concerned for my childrens well being, they are pretty serious incidents as well. Though don't want to go into too much detail here. My son has quite complex SN as well and my in laws and his Dad don't make the effort to accommodate them. Would a court take these kinds of things into account? Also can I contact passport control and make a note on my children's passport record or whatever it is called? Thanks for replying. He does not have residency, does not even have them overnight, they live full time with me.

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akaemmafrost · 01/09/2011 05:54

However there is no residency order in place.

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babybarrister · 01/09/2011 07:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ElsieMc · 01/09/2011 08:35

Courts do generally go with the view that if the child would benefit or enjoy the holiday, permission to go would be granted. However, I don't know your current contact arrangements.

I think you are absolutely right to be cautious. The family courts have a very set view and sometimes people will agree to something their instinct tells them is wrong because they feel it is pointless to object given current legal thinking. I am guilty of this.

However, this is your child. Trust your instincts, if it doesnt feel right, do not agree. Once your child is in another country, there is little you can do to come to the rescue so to speak and you will be outside the court's jurisdiction. The worse that will happen to you is that the court will make an order but at least your concerns will be on record.

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akaemmafrost · 01/09/2011 13:01

Thanks, is it worth contacting passport control or something to have a note put on to say that in the event of the passport being reported lost they are to contact me? I have concerns he would report them lost, get new ones and take dc on those. I have their passports at the moment and they are safe.

As long as breath is in my body I will not agree to this, my do not put my dc first when there is alcohol around, they are all heavy drinkers and I stayed in the relationship with my ex for longer than I ever should have because then I knew my dc would be safe. The thought of them being so far away with this people actually makes me feel sick with fear.

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STIDW · 01/09/2011 19:35

Yes you can ask the passport office to make a note and the charity Reunite has a help sheet with other suggestion to prevent children being taken to another country without the appropriate consent.

Babybarrister's point about overnight contact is important. If it is safe for regular overnight contact in the UK it would be difficult to justify withholding consent for a holiday abroad.

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akaemmafrost · 03/09/2011 10:15

He does not have regular overnight contact as he does not have a suitable place to take them, I think if he did it wouldn't be a problem. Its just when he gets with his family they drink heavily and just lose sight of everything. Would I get a chance to say this in court if it came to that?

Thanks again for replying to me.

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