Divorce -do people HAVE to?

[marantha]

Odd title I know but my cousin and her husband have been married for just 3 years (both only late 20s) but have realised it was a mistake.
Facts:
*No children.
*Husband owns house.
*No joint assets.
*No debts taken out jointly.
*No intensely bad feeling between them just an amicable joint feeling that they made a huge error in getting married.
*Neither of them wish to fork out for the expense of a divorce, and he is willing to pay her a few thousand pounds (just to cover cost of bits 'n' pieces that she has contributed to house e.g. paint and so on)to settle things. She is willing to accept this. He trusts her not to ask for anything more out of him and vice versa (their choice).

It sounds stupid what with divorce being such a big thing in society, but what options are available to them for minimum fuss/expense?
I can't quite believe that it can be a simple process. Can it be?

[Resolution]

They should both go to court and ask the court staff for any leaflet there is on how to divorce. Sounds like they'll have to seperate for 2 years, as it doesn't look like adultery or unreasonable behaviour would apply here.

[marantha]

Thank you. No, from what I can gather it's just a case of them realising they are fundamentally incompatible and neither of them wish to make a big deal out of it or, rather, as little a deal as possible.

[allnightlong]

You can I know a few people who have done it. They could formally seperate but not divorce if they wanted to be more cautious from a legal stand point. If after 2 years they wish to divorce it's very simple and can be granted in a matter of months.

[nocake]

Divorce doesn't have to be expensive. You can prepare the divorce petition yourself so will only pay the court fees. They should, however, make sure they get a court approved agreement (consent order) separating their finances. It is worth spending some money to get this drawn up by a solicitor.

Although your cousin's husband trusts her not to ask for any more in the future (and vice versa) situations can change so a legal split is important.

[DrSeuss]

My friend and her husband sat down with the paperwork, filled it in and sent it off with payment. No fuss, almost no lawyers, so it can be done.

[Truckulent]

I think what BB is saying without a court approved clean break consent order either party can come back and ask for the finances to be sorted later for example the lottery winner recently who'd been divorced for years had to pay his ex 2 million

[MitchyInge]

I haven't got round to sorting out a divorce yet, 15 yrs or so post separation. Can't imagine wanting to marry again so what is the point?

Think it is partly because I always have better things to spend money on, am sure it can be done cheaply but am happy to wait for one of us to die.

[Resolution]

Truckulent is right about that, though it works both ways.

Mitchy - one reason for getting divorced is state pensions. If a wife, on the basis of her own NI contributions, isn't entitled to a full pension, but her husband has a better contribution history (not uncommon) she can elect on divorce to have her pension worked out on the basis of his contribution record.

[nocake]

You've hit the nail on the head, Truckulent. You win the lottery and your ex can go to the court and demand part of it. How happy would you be if that happened?

It's far better to get a consent order drawn up and approved by the court. If the financial split is amicable and simple then it's not expensive to do but could save a lot of hassle in the future.

[STIDW]

This thread illustrates that online divorce, self representing and not taking independent legal advice can be a false economy.

Without a court order settling the finances there is the potential for claims any time in the future, including claims to a deceased ex-spouses estate. Even if the probability of being successful is low as time passes sorting out the finances tends to get more complicated and therefore the legal fees are more expensive. A final court order is the only way to ensure all future financial claims are dismissed and peace of mind.

When someone is remarried they are barred from claiming property adjustment orders or financial provision but can still apply for pension sharing. However this doesn't prevent applications started before remarriage from going ahead. When a petitioner to divorce made claims by ticking the boxes for financial orders in the petition the application may proceed.

[Resolution]

When a respondent to a divorce has remarried they cannot then apply to the court for any financial relief, including pension sharing.

[mumoverseas]

Totally agree with STIDW and Babybarrister (as usual) No matter how little people think they have, it is essential to get financial matters resolved once and for all

[marantha]

Thanks for replies. I do think that although they want things to be as cheap and easy as possible, they wish to make a clean break of it once and for all. They are still relatively young and don't want 'baggage' hanging around IYSWIM.

[STIDW]

That brings the thread in a complete circle. Court orders settling the finances can only become effective after the court has granted the first part of divorce so to make a clean break one of the parties will need to apply for divorce.

The actual divorce isn't that complicated and if your cousin or her husband are prepared to do some research and form filling it is possible for them to do it themselves. The form D8, guides and list of court fees are all available to download from HM Court Services website.

Settling the finances is a different matter. Most people do not have the knowledge or experience to do it themselves. It isn't possible just to read the law to understand it. Many online services appear cheap but they do not include the price of legal advice. Without independent legal advice the final order may not be ratified or if it is ratified challenged at a later date. I've lost count of the number of people posting on the internet who have lost £10ks because they wouldn't spend £1k- £1.5k on a solicitor.

[STIDW]

"When a respondent to a divorce has remarried they cannot then apply to the court for any financial relief, including pension sharing."

I am not a solicitor but my understanding is this is a moot point. Some lawyers argue that s28(3) MCA 1973 which bars applications for property adjustment orders and financial provision on remarriage was not amended to include pension sharing orders. It is therefore possible for a Respondent caught by the remarriage trap (or indeed a Petitioner who has not incorporated a prayer for a pension sharing order in his/her petition) to apply for a pension sharing order notwithstanding remarriage providing the petition was issued on or after 1 December 2000.

[Resolution]

You are quite correct. My apologies. What do I know!

[NotActuallyAMum]

Sorry for the hijack OP...

If you do have a clean break done through solicitors via a consent order there's no comeback at all...is there?

[prh47bridge]

If you both had independent legal advice the only comeback is if one party was hiding assets so that the order was based on false information.

[mumoverseas]

And also assuming that it is actually ratified by the Court. My old local Court used to reject up to 70% of Consent Orders when first lodged, usually for minor things like the DJ not being happy with Form M1/information statement or other petty thing. Don't assume just because it has been lodged that all ok and wait until it has been sealed.