Did you go for counselling with IVF? Should I?

[Eggsiseggs]

Just curious, really. Just waiting to start our first cycle in the next couple of weeks.

As part of the whole process, we have been offered counselling. I feel pretty ok (excited, even!) about the whole thing after years of messing around with ttc blah blah blah. DH is willing to go, in fact I think he thinks we should (but he is very keen on doing everything 'properly', iykwim!).

I dunno. I suspose I am trying not to get totally consumed by it all. I still need to work full time in quite a demanding job, and I just don't want to dwell on it.

Ahhh FFS I don't even know what I am trying to say! Will shut up

Did you go? Was it good? Should I go?!!!

(Surely, surely these boards need a 'Headfuck' emoticon?!!)

[Eggsiseggs]

Thanks cola!
Am not sure if the fact I don't want to talk about it means that I actually should, but it's good to know I don't have to.

Sending me crazy already!

[Bijou30]

Hi eggsiseggs,

It sounds like you're in a positive frame of mind, which is a good place to start. We were never actually offered counselling when we had IVF but we knew it was available.

I think if you and your husband are talking about it together and you've both got friends you can talk to (which, at the risk of generalising, can be harder for men), and if, like you say, you don't want to dwell on it, I wouldn't feel obliged to take up the offer of counselling.

But it would be good to hear from others who've had counselling and found it helpful.

Best of luck!

[hels71]

I didn't........but a few years on am considering it. We had one that worked and one that didn't and i am having trouble coming to terms with it. They did say we could go afterwards...but I'm not sure how long after!!!

[RaspberrySnowCone]

I did, it was helpful and will go again depending on the round I'm undertakings outcome in three weeks. Ill need it if this doesn't work, I'm finding the whole thing very stressful!

[eurochick]

I did with my first cycle as I thought it might help me come to terms with needing IVF, which I was really struggling with. I found it useless. She just head tilted at me and I didn't find it helpful at all. I didn't bother after that.

[NooMyx]

We had to have a session before going ahead with an egg share cycle years ago. It was a nice, relaxed chat together really, nothing very shrinky. Not sure if it was in any way necessary, but certainly didn't lose anything either.

[hawkeye21]

I did after a particular failed cycle. I struggled to deal with it and my consultant recommended it. It did help me on that occasion. It wasn't anything I considered or felt the need for at other times though (even other failed cycles).

[fairypangolin]

I did a couple of sessions by telephone when I was feeling overwhelmed and needed just to blurt out everything on my mind. The cycle worked so I didn't need to continue. Didn't get DH involved because it didn't seen necessary and part of my motivation was to avoid spilling too much on him a d then getting cross when he wouldn't respond the way I wanted.

So I would say give it a try, you don't have anything to lose.

[FreckleyGirlAbroad]

I live abroad and the private clinic we used didn't offer counseling. We used egg donation but like others pps have said, we talked it over and over as a couple and had no other options so went ahead with no counseling. It's not to say I might not need it one day in the future, but for now we didn't feel it was necessary.