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Chat with other users about all things related to working life on our Work forum.

Work

Has your partner taken paternity leave recently?

77 replies

Tom · 02/03/2004 19:04

Dear mumsnetters

I wonder if I could ask your help...
I need to find a few couples where dad has recently taken paternity leave, to get some quotes and stories for a major speech by the govt minister who introduced paternity leave - Patricia Hewitt (the minister for women).

I'd be particularly interested in dads who would not have been able to get time off after the birth had it not been for the introduction of the new law (perhaps because their employer would have said no), and also couples where the two weeks off were a particularly positive experience - for example, if mum had a traumatic birth and because of the two weeks off, the dads presence after the birth was really helpful, or perhaps dads who really took the opportunity to get stuck into the baby care during the initial two weeks, providing them with a solid start in terms of confidence and competence as far as looking after the baby.

If anyone has a good story to tell, please could you respond on the thread or email me at [email protected]

Mucho appreciated.

OP posts:

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WideWebWitch · 02/03/2004 20:23

Tom, I know this isn't what you're looking for but the pay for paternity leave is so ridiculously pitiful that it's not worth having for most people. At £100 a week almost all fathers will be better off taking holiday (and getting paid accordingly) instead of calling it paternity leave. Just wondered if you're calling for it to be more? Sorry, our story is no good for your purposes, dp took a week off but it had to be unpaid since he isn't in a permanent job.

Bron · 02/03/2004 21:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bron · 02/03/2004 21:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

miranda2 · 02/03/2004 21:18

What??? I thought paternity leave was on full pay? Or is that at the discretion of the company?
We had a week - remember being quite cheesed off taht although the govt had announced it would be two weeks, it didn't actually come into effect until the following april (no good for Hewitt's speech i'm afraid!).
What we really need is something like the (Scandinavian?) system where either the mother or the father can take 9 months on full pay, or they can split it - then in theory there'd be complete gender equality, so no employers thinking women cost more cos they might have babies...

miranda2 · 02/03/2004 21:20

Oh, and while i'm at it, Tom, if you have the ear of Patrici Hewitt could you bend it to the effect that childcare really ought to be a tax-deductible business expense since it is physically impossible to work without it? As a vicar I am currently earning 16k (12k after tax) and paying 7.5k in childcare - dreading the effect of having a second, and what if its twins?? Cheers mate! M.

Hulababy · 02/03/2004 21:24

DH has not taken any paternity leave since Dd was born 22 months ago. One simple reason - £100 a week is so far below what he normally gets it just isn't financially viable. Would have to be a desperate last resort for him to use it. Sorry - doesn't help you I know.

Hulababy · 02/03/2004 21:25

Miranda2 - Dh agrees whole heartedly with you on the tax issue of child care. He is forever going on about it!

prufrock · 02/03/2004 21:31

Same story here Tom, DH managed to save holiday and take 3 weeks which covered whilst I was in hospital, and two weeks after I came out post c-section. Really couldn't have managed without him -he did all the night feeds whcih I'm sure contributed to my speedy recovery, and it was lovely for the 3 of us to be able to spend time realy getting to know each other. But even with me being on full pay from my job during maternity leave there is no way we could have afforded for him to take time off at only £100 per week. And I should think a lot of people will be in a similar situation, especially at a time when they are having to shell out more money.
In fact I'd be interested to see gov figures on how many fathers do take it up -ie how many employers claim the money back

twiglett · 02/03/2004 21:46

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twiglett · 02/03/2004 21:46

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Hulababy · 02/03/2004 21:48

Off on a tangent slightly but would you believe this. My mum got a week's worth of paid leave (full pay) when I had DD. As I had had a cs her employee (local council) offers this option to come and look after me. Could be taken as individual day's too not just aas a full week. So useful! Couldn't believe our luck, especially as Dh doesn't get anything like that.

prufrock · 02/03/2004 21:59

Dh did actually get 2 days fully paid paternity leave when dd was born. But his company (big city firm) have now stopped that and are offering the 2 weeks at £100 instead. However they do still offer al employees 2 days paid leave for - get this - moving house!

Debbiethemum · 02/03/2004 22:55

We have saved money to cover dh's wages so that dh can take some paternity leave.
However since they made him redundant in Sept as they thought the company was going bust, hired him as a contractor for October and re-employed him in November. He was only out of work for 2 days!! He is no longer entitled to paternity leave.
This leaves us having to persuade his boss to let him have some extra time off.

lydialemon · 02/03/2004 23:24

I have to echo that 2 weeks at £100 a week is ridiculous. DH works in local government and got a week on full pay, and then took 2 weeks holiday. It was wonderful having him home, but it had nothing to do with the new measures! If we had had to rely on them I would have been alone.

Sorry Tom!

Ailsa · 03/03/2004 00:35

My dh works for Royal Mail, he was entitled to 1 week on full pay and 1 week on £100 SPP. Needless to say, like so many others here he only took the first week. Even though I'd had a c-section I told him to go to work on the second week, if I got stuck with anything I could ring his mum who only lives at the end of the road, she took dd1 and ds to school everyday.

Before the changes came into effect my dh was allowed 1 week paternity leave with full pay. So the changes made no difference to us.

Ailsa · 03/03/2004 00:37

Meant to say, previously dh could take his paternity leave as odd days at any time during the first 3 months, but had to take the last lot as a full week.

expatkat · 03/03/2004 04:08

Dh was categorically told by the bank he works for that they don't "do" paternity leave & it was by no means an option for him. I thought all men working in Britain were entitled to it.

bobthebaby · 03/03/2004 07:04

We don't live in the UK Tom so I'm no use but my dh took 6 weeks unpaid leave when ds was born. He was the first to take unpaid leave in his company, others did as other posters dh's did and saved up holiday. We wanted to take a holiday in the UK when ds was six months so the unpaid leave was a brilliant option for us - I realise that in the UK it would be much more difficult.

handlemecarefully · 03/03/2004 08:38

Ha ha ha! - paternity leave, wot my dh???

He has a 'self employed' contract with Zurich - which in his defence means that he doesn't get paid if he doesn't work (isn't entitled to paid holidays or anything)so the governments changes mean bugger all to us.

If history repeats itself for number 2 (due soon) he'll be back at work next day. Still my mother will come down to stay and help out.

twiglett · 03/03/2004 08:40

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handlemecarefully · 03/03/2004 08:41

Totally agree with Miranda2 - why on earth isn't childcare considered a cost of employment and tax deductible? Makes me seethe

Bozza · 03/03/2004 08:53

When DS was born in Feb 2001, DH took a week's paid paternity leave and a week's annual leave. This was before statutory paternity leave so we were quite happy.

No2 is due in May and so DH is now entitled to the second week at £100 but of course like others we cannot afford this, so he will be taking a week's paternity and a week's holiday. At least it will be May and not February! I suppose we're lucky that his work pay the first week at full.

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WideWebWitch · 03/03/2004 09:22

Prufrock, blimey, but of course moving house is more important than having a baby!!

oliveoil · 03/03/2004 09:32

I am quite lucky in that dh works for the family business so can take time off more than normal, had two weeks off (full pay) when I had dd.

Not sure what I would have done otherwise as I needed him to help out due to me having a section.

Bizarrely, his friend doesn't see the point in having time off when they have just been born as 'they don't do anything apart from cry'...bet he is a good hubby.

Blackduck · 03/03/2004 09:43

My company gives the first week at full pay and the econd at the statutory £100....colleague took the second week as leave as couldn't afford the drop to £100.
My dp is a uni lecturer so whilst his employer offers the two weeks as required he couldn't take it as ds appeared at the most crucial point of the year for his students (projects and all that...)..but then I did have him around for the whole of the summer

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