Problems with DD - Year 1

[greenbean100]

I hope you all may be able to offer some advice. Sorry this is so long.

My dd is now in Year 1. She can read anything, easily worked her way through a Year 3 maths book last year at home and I guess may fit into what you call G&T.

She is at a private school, because in nursery she was way above average but struggled socially.

Her reception year was fantastic - everything we could have hoped for. She was very stimulated in a class room filled with activities and things to do. She had a great teacher who brought out the best in her. She developed socially in leaps and bounds.

This year it has gone horribly wrong. She is in a plain class room setting, and has a newly qualified teacher. She started term enthusiastic, always finishing her extenstion work and getting everything right, but in many ways needing more. When she brought maths homework home, it was in a similar layout to what she does in class. 1 section very easy and gradually getting more difficult in the following 2 sections. She could do it all easily and said "this is silly". She got to the point where I would get the homework out and she would cry. She would pretend to struggle doing something as simple as 6 - 3, trying to count on her fingers and getting muddled. (She could do this sum mentally when she was 3!). The spellings she is bringing home are cat, mat, cup etc - I know the whole class has to be catered for - but they are way to easy for her, and she doesn't understand why.

It has got to the point where her teacher took me to one side this week and said she has gone from being bright and enthusiastic to tired all the time, and having no concentration. She has stopped doing any extension work and takes along time doing just the basics - apparently being distant and day dreamy. She said my dd says she is tired and suggested she sees a doctor!

I saw the doctor, who as I expected said she looked fine but is checking for diabeties although this is unlikely as she is wide awake and full of beans at home.
Whilst we were waiting to see the doctor however, we were in the waiting room for about 40 mins. After half an hour a cheerful girl went to having a long face, saying she was tired. I know know tired definately means "bored!!". She walked happily to school, but the moment we went thought the gate, the long face came back.

DD has never slept particularly well. I remember in nursery making sure she had an action packed afternoon, as she never slept well unless she was stimulated in the day. She doesn't go to sleep now, unless she spends an hour reading independantly first. Which is ok - I allow for it with bed time, but it shows she isn't getting what she needs at school.

With the teacher being so young and an NQT, I find it hard to talk to her and to be honest, I am not sure she has the experience to work out how to get the best out of dd. I genuinely seem to struggle to communicate - my problem I know, she doesn't give the impression of being a very confident person and I don't want to seem over powering and pushy.

Has anyone been through this. Can anyone give me advice as to how I get my bright little girl back?!!

Greenie x

[iheartdusty]

not been through this, but wanted to bump for you.

It really sounds as though your DD is understimulated. What does the teacher say about her abilities and about the work itself?

[Clockface]

Have you got Parents' Consultation evenings coming up? It would be worth asking about extension work then. NQTs should be clued up about differentation so it might just be a case of speaking frankly to the teacher and asking directly for more challenging work.

My brother was v. understimulated in yr 1 - sounds v. similar.

[cory]

Ask about extension work seems the first thing to do. The teacher should be able to find her something! Would probably also help if the teacher had a chat and explained that she does understand her situation but that she can't give her extension work unless she does the boring work first.

The second thing is to make clear to her that the homework set for her by the teacher is not the sum total of the learning she can do: you and her are going to do some special learning together in the evening. And then set her work! Being bored at school is bad enough but crying in the evenings because you're bored then seems horrible- and at least you can do something about that.

There are various possibilities here- but basically I think you should be looking at stretching her in a different direction rather than just doing more school work. My parents taught me foreign languages as that was their area of expertise, but you could do something like set her writing projects.

There are some really good websites on things like history, she could do her own research. There are also maths websites. And there are language courses you can buy; maybe you could do one together.
Or learn an instrument (you'd probably need to pay for tuition).

Also make sure you take her to the library every week so she can have a constant supply of interesting books.

Make it clear to her that if she gets through her homework quickly, she can then do more interesting work. What you want to avoid at all costs is that situation when they are working slower and slower.

Sorry if I sound as if I think you should be doing the teacher's work. I don't. But I'm thinking of your little girl and how important it is to keep her happy and stimulated.

[narnia2]

Hi there - I would definately go straight to the head teacher with this; Yr1 teacher sounds too inexperienced to deal with and head should have more insight. Read the chronology of your own story - its definatley under-stimulation of a very bright little girl and it's changing her whole persona - do something now!! And if head doesn't offer anything constructive you may need to consider a change of environment...

[JaneLumley]

Greenbean, I went ALL through this with ds, and am now facing it again with dd. IMHO, primary school is v. tough for kids like your dd. all I can suggest is tactful consultation - it's good that the teacher even acknowledges a problem. Try to talk about 'finding her something to do that hse enjoys' - many take fright at 'extension work' and interpret this as pushing. Meanwhile, offer lots of extension at home - eg new languages, making up stories, history tourism, Kumon, music, whatever suits her bent. I don't think schools yet cater for children like this. You just have to do the best you can to let her know she's ok.

[Elkat]

My DD sounds similar in the sense that she loves learning new things but absolutely cannot see the point in doing things she can already do... and this has lead to battles as she often refuses point blank to do them(although we're only reception, so still to see whether this works for us!).

At my DD's parents' evening, we have just negotiated that my DD would (for homework) do 1 page of standard homework and 1 page of her own work (as extension material) on the same topic. Also, there is no reason why the set homework must come first, so if you can do this, why not engage her with 'her' work first and then move into doing the homework, once she is in the mood - slip it in the middle, so she might not notice! We did it last night with the key words she had to learn, and she didn't even notice. Just leave space for the set homework to get put in first. Only an idea, but it may help!

[christywhisty]

I never quite get these threads about "bored because their too bright", there is far more to school than just doing writing and maths so even the brightest dc's shouldn't be bored a lot of the time.
My dc's were learning all about people and things likeFrancis Nightingale and the Crimean War,1st world war, about how babies grow and developed,Botswana and different religions when they were in the infants.There was plenty to keep them stimulated.

If you know she can do the spellings don't do them with her, homework is not supposed to extend it is supposed compound what is already known. I didn't bother reading with dd after reception and never did her spellings with her.