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Gifted and talented

When can you know your child does not have any talent in a music class?

15 replies

Fiona2011231 · 09/03/2014 09:14

I suppose every parent would hope your child could shine in a music class. But what would you do when he/she does not?

I have a four-year-old child who joined a singing/dancing class three months ago. Last week I came to the class to watch him and I found that he was slow and awkward. Although my child enjoys the class, I'm not sure if he will become better.

Should I give him more time or should I try to find another class for him?

My sincere thanks,

OP posts:
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SpeedData · 09/03/2014 09:21

Confused He's four and he's enjoying himself. What's the problem?

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Ohwhatfuckeryisthis · 09/03/2014 09:26

He's four, at that point isn't it more about him having fun? If he enjoys it, let him go.

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Picturesinthefirelight · 09/03/2014 09:27

At age four my dd was away with the fairies at her first singing/dance class

By 6 she was showing potential.

At 12 she's now at a full time ballet/dance/performing arts school.

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Martorana · 09/03/2014 09:32

If he's enjoying himself stay. If he isn't, stop and try again later.

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SagaNorensLeatherTrousers · 09/03/2014 09:38

You should only care whether he enjoys himself or not at this point.

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bootsycollins · 09/03/2014 09:40
Biscuit
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RegainingUnconsciousness · 09/03/2014 09:42

My good friends and I did a dance class for 13 years (thirteen years!) despite being shit, because we enjoyed it. If our parents (or the teacher) had pulled us out because we clearly weren't ever going to excel we'd have missed out on an important social event (we weren't in the popular gang, we needed this), and an important physical activity (we weren't exactly sporty!).

If he's enjoying it, let him carry on!

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Acinonyx · 09/03/2014 09:51

If he's enjoying it I would stay- in fact all the more so if he is a bit awkward as it may bay loosen him up. My dd was not particularly talented in this area (to say the least) but did ballet for nearly 3 years. I think it did her a lot of good precisely because she can be physically shy and awkward.

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Fiona2011231 · 09/03/2014 10:19

Great answers. I really appreciate your experience and advice. So I'll let him stay in the class.

OP posts:
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FastLoris · 09/03/2014 20:16

And forget about the "talent" BS.

People come to all kinds of different things as different stages in their lives with different qualities to offer and different abilities to learn at various speeds. You have no idea how he'll respond to whatever other musical experiences he's likely to be exposed to. If he enjoys the class then he's obviously responding to music on some level, in whatever way is right for his stage of development.

What is it about music, particularly, that brings such baseless assumptions about hardwired and unchanging capacities out of the woodwork.

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Worriedandlost · 09/03/2014 22:12

Ha-ha-ha, dd had the same problem with one with her music instruments, also at 4, really-really bad, 10 months years later she started improved, 1.5 later her teacher considered her one of her most able students.

Do not give up, still too young, the most important thing that your child enjoys it! And it is good for self-confidence, posture, balance, etc!

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marmitecat · 09/03/2014 22:18

Ds1 lay on his back kicking his legs in the air while the other children in his pre school music class clapped rhythms and sang songs. Until the age of 7 his pitch was quite undeveloped. He dropped a violin quite early on in his string class.

He's 8 and about to do g3 on one instrument and g2 on another, has absolute pitch and has just been offered applace as a cathedral chorister.

I'd say don't give up yet :)

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Pythonesque · 17/04/2014 13:46

At 4 I was tone-deaf and sang back in a monotone at a music group (kodaly etc based). 2 years later I came home from school told my mother how I'd discovered that notes at the 2 ends of a piano sounded different (we had a piano at home as well). Within weeks of that incident I insisted I wanted to learn violin alongside my desperate-to-learn younger sister. So I did. Without the relatively intensive music exposure that I ended up having I wouldn't have been able to appreciate music let alone be the musician (serious amateur level) I am today.

I was also stiff and poorly coordinated and doing ballet classes in effect provided an important form of physiotherapy for me, though I had to give up at about age 8 as progressing to the next group was inappropriate as I wouldn't physically have managed it.

My son was interested in doing ballet age 4 but I was delayed a couple of months in actually taking him to try out a class. He refused to join in, just wanted to watch, so after a couple of times I insisted that I wouldn't take him unless he was prepared to join in. Possibly I should have persevered but didn't want to overload him at the time etc. I have subsequently come to understand that his personality means he doesn't like to try until he is confident he knows exactly what to do - he was asked to leave a singing group at one point because of the perception that he didn't want to do it. Now a chorister because singing is absolutely what he wants to do!

A group that is engaging your child and that they want to participate in (or even just attend) is a GOOD THING :) They will gain a lot regardless of what their subsequent ability turns out to be. With music I am a great believer in "every child can" (Suzuki philosophy amongst others); even though I'm blessed with children with talent I would have sought to encourage them in music anyway.

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ReallyTired · 17/04/2014 23:06

"vI suppose every parent would hope your child could shine in a music class. But what would you do when he/she does not?"

Does the OP have to be good at everything? Music classes help improve concentration, listening skills and language skills. In answer to the OP, I would look to see if my child enjoyed the class. I would only take out my child if they didn't want to go.

Four years old is too young to write off a child as having no musical talent. My son took up guitar at 9 and half and has made excellent progress.

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JulieMichelleRobinson · 23/04/2014 16:23

At four, I don't expect to even know if they're "good at it or not". At four, I expect them to be having fun, exploring new concepts. Some learn those concepts faster than others, but it doesn't mean they'll end up being better musicians.

Besides which, why only ever do things that you're good at?

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