Thinnies wishing to expand!

[Rhubarb]

Couldn't resist this one after seeing the other thread either! Bit like the chubby/skinny babies thread!

I know this will get on a lot of people's nerves but I've always been thin and hated it! No curves whatsoever, no period until I was sixteen, no boobies until I was 21 and only recently have they become a decent size (b cup although the b*h at Debenhams says I'm being optimistic here - what does she know?! I had to grow long hair just so people would know I was female! Now if I do put on weight it goes straight to my bottom and stomach. How can I put on weight evenly? I do exercise and I eat well, so there really shouldn't be a problem. I just wish I could have Kate Winslet's figure, nice and curvy and even! I'm fed up with being a straight line, I WANT CURVES!

Didn't even have a boyfriend until I was in my mid-twenties, sob, sob.

[jasper]

Rhubarb, is that why you chose your nickname, because you are long and slim?
On the contrary I don't find it in the least annoying that you have brought up this topic. It is helpful for a fattie like me to remember even slimsters such as yourself may not be totally happy with their shape.
I'm not obsessed, honest...

[Snugs]

Rhubarb .... Thank you, thank you, thank you for starting this thread.

I am so glad not to be the only one in this postition ... if I ever dare to say I hate my shape or size I get shouted down by friends who are trying to diet and assume I am incredibly happy to be thin (5' 4" and less than 7 1/2 stone and very unhappy about it ).

My b cup boobs vanished when I stopped bf and have now decided to retreat to an unmeasurable nothingness but the kangaroo pouch belly refuses to go.

If you find the miracle diet that we both seem to need pleeeeeaaaase let me know

[mollipops]

Snugs and Rhubarb, you are legends! Another skinny here who is not as thrilled about it as others seem to imagine! 5'3" and 7 st, 10A bra, belly that nobody seems to see but me, cellulite on my skinny flabby thighs. YUK! Solidarity at last! Gotta fly now, but will drop back later!

[CAM]

sorry can't talk to any of you. I used to be too skinny but that was before having dd 2 when at an advanced age so the flab has just stuck and won't go away.

[Mopsy]

Am compelled to give you all a mention on the slapping thread..... love Mopsyx

[Rhubarb]

Doesn't it just go to show though that even us skinnies have problems with our appearances?! One of the problems with being skinny is that people have no problem with being nasty to you because of it. I would get called an annoying skinny b*ch because whilst my work colleagues were having their Rivetas and Philadelphia, I would eat a healthy meal of pie and chips. I wouldn't dare call them fat, but they thought they had the right to take the p**s out of my weight!

I still hate it when I go shopping for clothes, tops just hang on me, there simply isn't anything there to fill them! I used to wear baggy clothes to hide the fact that I had no boobs, now at last I can wear tight tops, thanks to Wonderbra! Although before I was married I used to worry that any guy would be sorely disappointed if I took him home!

I wish I knew of a weight gaining supplement that would distribute weight evenly - fat chance! (sorry about the pun there!)

All thinnies feel free to moan on here!

[mollipops]

That's so true Rhubarb, how people have no hesitation in calling you skinny/bony/thin/anorexic etc but the same people wouldn't dream of saying to an obese person how fat/huge/flabby they are!!! It makes me crazy! It's not like they are saying it as a compliment, it's definitely not intended as one. Nor do I feel that it is one...I know things could be worse but I don't delight in my shape any more than someone who is trying to lose weight. Grr. Ok rant over time to go...

[Art]

I,m quite skinny too and since b/feeding most of my clothes look like they still have the coat hanger in them!
Nothing ever fits, trousers always have a big gape at the back..... can no longer share clothes with my sister.. sob sob.

Why does everyone assume you must be happy with your shape, just because you´re thin. Lets face it tho´, whether fat or thin is any woman really content with their shape?

Is anyone out there totally 100% happy with there shape?

[CAM]

I'm not

[mollipops]

Snugs, Rhubarb and Art and anyone else who wants to help - I need a shoulder to cry on. Someone at work today said something to me which I think was intended as a derogatory comment and the more I think about it the more upset I get.

Deep breath - someone had left an empty envelope on the front of the counter; said workmate tossed it over to me and said "Did you have your lunch in this or something?" and then walked away. I laughed at the time but afterwards realised the possible nature of her comment. Would you find this offensive or am I being overly sensitive? I mean, there is another woman at work who is a very large (lovely) lady, and I know she is currently trying to lose weight, but I wouldn't have even thought of saying something like that to her while giving her a large box or whatever - the opposite equivalent of the comment made to me IYKWIM - and I would be mortified if I was to overhear such a remark.

I have only been working there for about 4 weeks and I am feeling a bit put-upon by this. Everyone has been so nice and made me feel so welcome, but this woman works in a different section and I haven't had much contact with her to date. (Btw it was "casual" dress today so I had jeans on, which I guess accentuate my thinness more so than "professional" clothes do.) What do you make of it?

[Lucy123]

mollipops - I'm definately not skinny but see why you're upset. I guess the reason people think it's ok to insult skinnies (or in my case, big breasted women) is because they themselves are jealous and can't see how you could take offence. It's not the same with fat people as most people are not jealous of them. Don't laugh if this woman makes another such comment, but equally don't make a big thing of it. HTH

[Rhubarb]

Oh Mollipops! I really feel for you, it's just not on is it? What gives them the right to pick on you because of your size? As you said, they wouldn't have dared say that to a larger woman. I used to get this too when I was working, the usual comments like, "Stop hiding behind that pen!" and "don't move too quickly you might snap!" Ha bloody ha! Of course you could come back with some witty ones of your own, my favourite was "Well at least I can put on weight, whereas you can never change your face!" but the confrontational ones are the best "What exactly do you mean by that? Is that meant to be funny?" this embarrasses them enough to show them that it is simply not on to make jokes about someone's size.

I guess we should be thankful, after having kids we are still slim and all. But often you just don't feel like a woman do you? Well, at least you have a loving husband and a beautiful daughter, you are obviously intelligent and going by the other thread, very calm-headed and reasonable. I think you would make somebody a very good friend, so that work colleague of yours has just lost out!

Hope that makes you feel a bit better

[pupuce]

Mollipops....I've been there too...still very skinny and now thinner then before my 2 pregnancies... I should stop BF ... (just kidding!) but it is true that people feel they can comment when they should not. I would follow the advice from Rhubarb and say something liks : is this suppose to be funny ? - that will embarass them !
Or ignore it....
But it is hurtful!

[Snugs]

Mollipops.... I think said work colleague needs to be on the good slapping thread.

Just out of interest, what is her figure like? As Lucy 123 rightly points out comments of this kind invariably come from people who are jealous.

I have spent years of torment because of comments thrown at me - since my early teens - and only recently have I come to terms with the fact that I am not the one with the problem ... they are. Hear, hear to Rhubarb's confrontational approach, I wish I had done it a long time ago.

[chinchilla]

I can honestly say that I personally don't know what you lot are moaning about I can't seem to stop eating at the moment, having done so well before, losing 1 stone 5 lbs.

I suppose that it shows us that we all want what we are not. I have dead straight think hair, and would love curls. I have huge hips and thighs, and would LOVE to be 7 1/2 stone!! Oh well, it's a shame that we can't all swap for a day, we would probably then be happy with our bodies then!

[Rhubarb]

Yes but Chinchilla, I bet you had support losing weight, there is no such support out there for us wanting to gain it. In general people tend to be much more pc with overweight people than with skinny ones - it's like the whole world is now saying it is healthy to be overweight and practically a sin for being skinny! Geri Halliwell and Victoria Beckham have both been slagged off by the press for setting a bad example to young girls - just for being skinny! As Victoria says, she can do nothing about her weight, so it hurts when people say she is a bad example.

But you are also right, none of us are happy with our bodies, but that still doesn't give anyone the right to comment on them - I would never call you 'lanky hair' and would hope you would never call me 'beanpole'!!!!

[ionesmum]

Mollipops, sounds like a true case of jealousy to me. Pity her for being so sour.

[bossykate]

this thread has been something of a wake up call for me. i couldn't have imagined that anyone would be hurt be being teased about being slim/thin - as other people have mentioned, it is what we are all supposed to aspire to! although i can easily imagine that it must be very tedious! well, ladies, i can assure you it is entirely motivated by envy! i will be more conscious of this in future.

[SueDonim]

I used to be extremely thin (5ft 6in and 7st) and its true that people do feel free to make comments about your weight. I've always put it down to envy.

Annoyingly, although I now weigh about 9st, people still say I'm thin, when I can see (and grab!) the fat on my body!!

[pupuce]

Well I am very thin and like it... keep saying to DH that he should NEVER complain as I'm sure loads of women wished they were my size.... BUT there are people who think I am too thin and then imply that you are anorexic, etc
I am fairly secure so I really don't care. It is envy and jalousy and these are comments they are not welcome.
Sigh....

[chinchilla]

Rhubarb - Of course I would never call you beanpole (although I would mean it as a compliment if I did, because I would never mean anything unkindly - I'm not that kind of person). I now understand that thin people don't think of these things as compliments though, which I didn't before.

I think that someone like me would always mean 'beanpole' as an envious compliment, not a bitchy comment, although I can see now that some people are meaning to be unkind. It must be hard to differentiate these two types when you are not happy with your weight. However, if you called me 'lanky hair', it could never be thought of in any way as a compliment! (My hair is actually thick and straight, not greasy )

I do understand in some way how you are feeling though, because, at 5'3", people have always thought it is OK to comment on how short I am. It is always said so matter of factly, as in "How's the weather down there?", or "Oh, you are short aren't you". I know I'm short thanks, I don't need telling!

I suppose that both fatties and thinnies need to consider the feelings of others before they speak. I still envy you all though, because I am a greedy person, and it is only by hard work that I am not the size of a house!

At least you can have fun eating cream cakes - sigh...I'm off to munch on a stick of celery

[chinchilla]

Another thing that I meant to say is that, yes, you are right to a certain extent about the pc thing. If you are slightly overweight, people don't comment. However, if you are huge, they think that they can treat you like s**t.

My sis, who is a fantastic girl (well, woman I suppose, being 26!) is large. I think that she is a size 28. People walk past her in the street, and think that they can be openly nasty because of her size. I know that she can lose weight, and you can't help being thin, but it just goes to show that people are nasty across the board.

I think that the point here is that people are horrible, and we just need to be like my sister and love ourselves for what we are. I should stop beating myself up for needing to lose half to one stone still, and you thinnies out there need to relish in it.

Buy some low waist trousers, and make me jealous with your flat tummies. I'll buy a push up bra and make you jealous with my big boobies!

[Rhubarb]

LOL Chinchilla about the big boobies!! It is true that skinny people do envy our larger breasted counterparts! You are right, people are nasty no matter what size or shape you are. Though I used to find it more hurtful when all the jokes and hurtful comments used to come from overweight women, I would never comment on their size, but they used to put me down to make themselves feel better - though I guess that happens the other way round too.

And I didn't actually mean you had lanky hair Chinchilla! Just using a point you made to make one myself! As it happens I think I have a big nose, frizzy hair, tiny boobs, horrible feet and lousy stretch marks. But then I guess I wouldn't be me without them!

[chinchilla]

I've just realised how unattractive we have made ourselves sound by the way

I'm greasy, fat and short; you're thin, frizzy haired and big nosed. YUM...

Perhaps there is a moral here. I'm ok looking despite my flab, so I think that I shall concentrate on that in future, instead of looking at my negative points.

Anyway, I think I've hijacked your 'thinnies' thread for long enough. Speak to you all soon.