Do we worry too much?

[goodkate]

I have been looking at this site now for 2 months. And I think that a lot of us mums worry too much about what our children should be doing/pooing/eating/drinking/talking/walking/learning etc.etc.

I think the most important thing to look out for is our childrens happiness. I have three dd and although with the first I was a bit more worried, generally the more laid back I have been the more I notice when something is genuinely wrong.

I think there is too much pressure on us to be the perfect mother via the press/media/grandparents.

Do I shout too much? Probably. Am I lazy with them? Sometimes. Do I feed them rubbish? occasionally. Did I worry when my dd2 didn't stop wearing a nappy until she was 3 even though my mother nagged me? did i hell.

Are my girls happy? Well judging there faces I'd say yes. I say take the pressure off ourselves and enjoy these wonderful, joyful human beings for what they are now and balls to the world!!!!

[Branster]

Indeed!!!

[Soulfly]

I am quite laid back. I think its a good way to be (well i try to be laid back)

[MeanBean]

Hear hear. We need more of this. Bringing up children is so difficult anyway, we don't need to worry about things that don't merit it. For most childhood problems, it's as much of a problem as you choose to make it. I keep telling myself that anyway...

[Nutcracker]

I think i have gotten more laid back the more kids i've had. My dad certainly thinks i'm laid back as i don't jump up and down to the kids every 5 seconds.

As far as health goes i am pretty laid back with Dd1 as she's hardly ever ill but with Dd2 i tend to panic as she once had pnumonia and went downhill pretty quickly.

[marthamoo]

Well said, goodkate!

[Tommy]

Hear hear again! I'm definitely more laid back with DS2 and that, in turn, is helping me be more relaxed with DS1!

[tweeny]

a mother of triplets told me of the concept of a "goodenough" mum when my twins were 6 months old. i draw great srength from this when i know i'm not being the best mum, but im not being the worst either.

[Beatrice]

I'm a new mum (dd is 16 weeks) and a chronic worrier. Here are some of the things I've worried about today. All you more experienced mums please feel free to set my mind at rest about any/all of them.

1. The shape of her head is a bit weird.
   
2. She's getting lead poisoning from the tap water I make her formula with.
   
3. She's being poisoned by the formula itself.
   
4. She'll end up being called Scarface by the kids at school because she keeps scratching herself so badly.
   
5. She'll choke on her scratch mitts as she tries to suck her fingers.
   
6. She'll be poisoned by the washing powder residue in her scratchmitts.
   
7. I'm not sure whether scratchmitts is spelt with one t or two.
   
8. She hasn't shown any sign of wanting to roll over yet, so she must be a couch potato like her dad.
   
9. The stripes on her vest clashed with her cardigan.
   
10. Should she be wearing a cardigan in this weather?
    I could go on, but that's enough for today. I'll just add that my friend's sister was worried for ages about the length of her daughter's arms. She couldn't understand why it was that when her daughter lay flat on her back with her arms extended they were level with the top of her head, whereas adults' arms extend a good foot or two above their heads. Health visitor had to point out that babies' proportions are quite different from adults'.

[tweeny]

point 9. advise calling in trinny and susannah

[Davros]

I agree that people worry too much in general, but especially when it comes to babies/children. You need to save it up for when there's really something wrong! WHen there's good cause to worry though someone is always ready to tell you not to worry! A no win situation. Although no-one wants to be complacent, many day-to-day worries are not worth wasting time on (except no 9 of that list of course ).