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General health

I have a terrible case of bad teeth because of dentist phobia..

24 replies

DENTSPOURRIS · 28/06/2013 10:54

It's really difficult for me to talk about that but I need to take the plunge : my teeth are really bad, I have 7 tooth missing (on the side of my mouth) and the rest are all grey apart from the teeth in the front.
I have a terrible dentist phobia due to my parents taking to a arsehole for treatments when I was little.

I'm scared about losing all my teeth, I'm in my late 20s, I'm still very scared of the dentist but I need to do something..I don't have a lots of money so what can I do to help myself ? I will appreciate you sharing your experience with me. I'm really depressed about it.

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BrianButterfield · 28/06/2013 11:03

I hadn't been to the dentist for a long time and knew I needed some real work done (back teeth had bits broken off, etc) - found an NHS dentist with spaces and had to go as DH was taking DS and I knew I should set an example. I used to lie awake and worry about them so much.

When I went I just explained it all and he was really gentle and kind, said that actually they weren't so bad and outlined some steps he could take to do the easy stuff first. No lectures or tellings-off!

I haven't actually had any of the work done yet but I haven't worried about them once since I went, it was really like a weight off my shoulders. Seriously they do understand these days and you are not alone as so many people have trouble affording or accessing dental care that there are a lot of people out there with bad teeth through no fault of their own.

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DENTSPOURRIS · 28/06/2013 11:08

Can I pay by installments you think ?

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LaundryLegoLunch · 28/06/2013 11:12

I had a six year fear of dentist and never went. Then I hot am abscess and was in the most unbelievable agony I have ever known and I was forced to go.

The dentist was so lovely, I told him I was nervous and hasn't been in years and he was really great at going slowly, explaining things clearly and constantly checking I was ok.

I'm still not a big fan of going but I can manage it now. Def ask friends for dentists they'd recommend or call a few surgeries and explain that you're very nervous and haven't been in years - they'll know the best people to see.

I had a horrible dentist in my teens but since then they've all been good. And the one that was not so nice (only that she was unfriendly not mean) I just didn't go back to. I told the receptionists I wanted to see someone else and they sorted it out)

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ukatlast · 28/06/2013 13:26

Good advice about getting recommendations. Lots of support here: www.dentalfearcentral.org/

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Owllady · 28/06/2013 13:30

This is a lot more common than you may think. I am exactly the same. I broke a tooth summer, have I been yet?

You are not alone though x

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Owllady · 28/06/2013 13:33

ukatlast, that link is really helpful, thanks

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fluffiphlox · 28/06/2013 17:14

I have always gone to the dentist regularly. Treatment has improved no end. Ask around your friends and pay if necessary to see someone they say is understanding and patient. I have a fantastic dentist (I have stayed with him through three practices). I am not at all phobic but he is very patient and amusing too! He is very considerate of my intolerance of cotton wool. It is a private practice and you can pay by credit card.
I'm afraid that I'm very judgemental about people with bad teeth. It looks awful, neglectful and generally repulsive. Nothing worse than looking at a gobful of shrapnel.

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Bluebell99 · 28/06/2013 17:24

I don't think fluffiphiox comments are helpful, who cares about her judgy pants or that she pays by credit card. Some people won't have that option!

Anyway, I have been phobic of dentists for years but I force myself to go regularly. I have an nhs dentist who is very nice and I trust. I have had some diazapem prescribed by my gp which helps if I need treatment, but I am so much better at going now. I recently broke a tooth and went straight to the dentist, rather than put it of. Get some recommendations from friends for a dentist who is good with nervous patients.

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fluffiphlox · 28/06/2013 17:30

I mentioned the credit card only because the OP was wondering about paying in instalments. If anything is worth spending good money on it's keeping a decent mouthful of teeth.

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fluffiphlox · 28/06/2013 17:34

I notice the OP is called DentsPourris, so this is may be a case of French teeth I think and (huge generalisation) as a nation, they don't appear to take dentistry as seriously as the UK even, let alone the level of obsession of the US.
Honestly, it's not painful, a little uncomfortable perhaps, but not like it was 40 years ago.

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PrettyFlyForAWifi · 28/06/2013 18:43

Fluff, did you mean to be so rude? People can have poor teeth for many reasons, you know.
Dents, well done on taking a first step by talking about it. I am what my dentist calls 'a true dental phobic' but she has made me so confident that I have even managed to have a dental implant inserted!
What I have learned is that there is no reason nowadays why dental treatment should hurt. Neglect is v painful though as I've learned to my cost.
My dentist is NHS and there is a cap on how much treatment can cost so it's fairly manageable. I have also had private treatment which cost me a fortune but was so worth it. The first step is to go and have a consultation. The news may not be as bad as you think! Good luck, and here's a hand if you need one to hold.

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fluffiphlox · 28/06/2013 19:36

Not meaning to be rude at all. The OP is calling herself DentsPourris. And I dont think I said anything that is so different to others' comments.
In a nutshell: it's not painful as such, get a dentist you know to be trustworthy.
If I am judgemental about the care someone has or hasn't taken with their teeth as an adult, I am probably not alone.

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PrettyFlyForAWifi · 28/06/2013 21:08

I don't think anyone else said that filled teeth were repulsive...it clearly took a lot for the op to write her post and that kind of comment is uncalled for, she's looking for support, not judgement.

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Dysgu · 28/06/2013 21:39

I recently found the courage to sort out starting to get my teeth sorted! The toothbus was visiting the county last month and I went and also took my DDs.

The dentist was lovely despite the state of my teeth and I left with a list of treatment needed and a list of local NHS dentists currently taking on patients. (Oh and she told me that DDs both have 'princess teeth' = phew!)

I walked straight over to the nearest dentist, filled in the registration forms and have an appointment in a fortnight. I am a bit anxious at meeting another dentist but once the initial meeting is over and they see my teeth, I am just looking forward to getting them sorted.

And I feel good now that my DDs have a check-up for September and I will then ensure they go every 6 months.

Good luck - I found the hardest bit was making the decision and following through but felt really proud of myself that I had made the first step. Now it seems easier...

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fluffiphlox · 28/06/2013 21:50

I didn't say filled teeth were repulsive I said obviously neglected teeth were. I have filled teeth myself. Most people in their mid fifties do. It was the way dentists worked in the sixties and seventies. By quantity not need. It was to do with the way they were paid, i would imagine I even had one back tooth extracted, probably needlessly. I have all my other teeth.
However, these days there is no need to present gaps and obviously neglected teeth to the world.
These days going to the dentist is a doddle compared to when I was young. They can even provide pain relief FOR the injection. For somebody in their Twenties to have seven missing teeth is quite shocking to me.

I would encourage the OP to get down there and get on with it. Have some bridgework or a denture if necessary. Bad teeth age you terribly. It irks me seeing otherwise well-presented people displaying unkempt gnashers. I say this to encourage her. She won't know she's born when she's had it all done.

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ukatlast · 28/06/2013 22:19

fluffiphlox - It's a good job most dentists no longer have your judgemental attitude. It's a huge reason why so many people avoid care...fear of judgement.
Not me though, you can't keep me away but I only go to reputable painless people which alas is easier privately than NHS.

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ukatlast · 28/06/2013 22:23

Dentspourris - the bottom line is if everyone had perfect teeth, dentists would be 'out of a job'. Most dentists know this and will treat you respectfully, understand many people have valid fears based on past experiences and suggest what they can to restore your dentition so you can eat more easily and smile with confidence. Function is more important than cosmetics though.

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DENTSPOURRIS · 29/06/2013 12:52

Thank you for all your comments, it helps. I need to go, I was up all night because of a bad tooth Sad

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Hassled · 29/06/2013 13:00

I went to the dentist a month ago for the first time in over 6 years. I googled local dentists and found one which specifically said they dealt with nervous patients - private, but yes I've been able to pay in installments. £40 for initial consultation + scale and polish. Fillings - a lot more, but I'm having one done each month so I can spread it out.

And I'm not going to tell you it was a piece of piss - none of my dentist issues have gone away. It wasn't fun - but my teeth look and feel one hell of a lot better and I really am thinking now "why the hell did I wait 6 years?". For the scale and polish on the first session we arranged it that I raised my hand if I needed them to stop (which I did, several times) and that makes a huge difference, just knowing I could do that.

So go for it - you'll be so pleased with yourself afterwards.

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Bluebell99 · 29/06/2013 15:26

if you are in pain with a tooth, then in a way it is even easier to go, as they will make the pain go away. I said earlier in the thread, i broke a tooth whilst at a friends house, I rang the dentist straight away and was about to get an appointment within half an hour. i went straight there and didnt have time to worry about it! He fixed the tooth.

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Leverette · 29/06/2013 15:53

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olivo · 29/06/2013 20:24

I can second having some low dose diazepam prescribed. I had a gap of about 14 years of not going and was terrified, but my GP prescribed diazepam and put me in touch with a lovely dentist. She is private but most I've paid is £90 in a go. Ll treatment was spread out as and when I could afford it.

Good luck, you've done well to speak up and get the ball rolling.

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PrettyFlyForAWifi · 30/06/2013 06:06

Oh good point, olivio - I had diazepam until I got my confidence up. Good luck op.

Fluffy, you said 'nothing worse than looking at a gobful of shrapnel', which I quite reasonably interpreted as fillings.

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willman61 · 08/06/2017 07:24

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